Originally posted by RockyMarcianofan00
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Reviewing threads looking for gramatical errors.....
I'd like to think I write essays very well but when i post on forums i tend to let my i's stay lower case
I need to review because I only read a few of the rounds and then winner because I have a short attention span for reading stuff on a computer screen. A book i can read but this cancerous screen gives me a headache.Last edited by RockyMarcianofan00; 06-03-2006, 10:20 PM.
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Originally posted by butterfly1964Tell me honestly, are the matchups poorly written in your poinion, I mean vocabulary wise?
When you write sounds more like an announcer announcing the fight which is what i think you were going for. It Doesn't sound like a formal essay with the long sentences and descriptive words which is what Smokin' is lookin for.
It sounds more like an announcer saying it into the mic which is what your saying. With short sentences and sometimes not proper sentences.
Some sentences are Essay like but i think your trying to stay more true to the Announcer persona (spelling?)
Example:
Rather then saying
George Foreman is down in the 8th round of this fight. He's bleeding from the mouth as Muhammad Ali raises his arms in proud victory for his win.
your saying
and Foremans down in the 8th round. he doesn't get up and Ali is dancing in hysteria for winning against Foreman.
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Originally posted by Smokin'Be honest butterfly, have you actually seen footage of Johnson/Dempsey?
There's even less of Johnson.
I saw part of one Johnson fight and I think they only have like 2 of his fights anyway
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Originally posted by RockyMarcianofan00To be honest it depends what your going for
When you write sounds more like an announcer announcing the fight which is what i think you were going for. It Doesn't sound like a formal essay with the long sentences and descriptive words which is what Smokin' is lookin for.
It sounds more like an announcer saying it into the mic which is what your saying. With short sentences and sometimes not proper sentences.
Some sentences are Essay like but i think your trying to stay more true to the Announcer persona (spelling?)
Example:
Rather then saying
George Foreman is down in the 8th round of this fight. He's bleeding from the mouth as Muhammad Ali raises his arms in proud victory for his win.
your saying
and Foremans down in the 8th round. he doesn't get up and Ali is dancing in hysteria for winning against Foreman., and I type so fast that I make a few spelling errors, but that's about it. The vocabulary I use I believe is pretty high level at times, and I give a detailed description of the prefight, the fight, in between rounds, and the post fight. I think overall I did a good job.
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Originally posted by butterfly1964Yeah, well the announcer persona is what I was trying to portray. The only thing wrong with it is that I oftentimes use lower case when I shouln't, because sometimes I don't feel like pressing the shift key, and I type so fast that I make a few spelling errors, but that's about it. The vocabulary I use I believe is pretty high level at times, and I give a detailed description of the prefight, the fight, in between rounds, and the post fight. I think overall I did a good job.
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Originally posted by Smokin'Be honest butterfly, have you actually seen footage of Johnson/Dempsey?
OF COURSE I'VE SEEN THEIR FIGHTS, ******! WHY THE HELL WOULD I WRITE ABOUT THEM AND NOT HAVE AN INCLING OF HOW THEY FIGHT OR NOT KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT THEM?!
They are my two favorite fighters anyway(besides ali of course), and i have five fights of johnson and six fights of dempsey in my collection and i have seen a total of 13 fights between the two. Does that answer your question buddy?
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Originally posted by RockyMarcianofan00I've seen footage on both of those fighters, there's little footage of Dempsey
There's even less of Johnson.
I saw part of one Johnson fight and I think they only have like 2 of his fights anyway
Johnson versus Burns, Flynn, Moran, Willard, Jeffries, Ketchel...umm, those are the ones I can bring to memory off hand, and I've seen footage of them all except the Moran fight.
Dempsey versus Willard, Carpentier, Brennan, Firpo, Tunney (x2), Sharkey, Gibbons...I've seen footage from all of those.
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Originally posted by RockyMarcianofan00I do the same thing, if i wanted to i could type every post as if it where an essay but i mean its a forum i'd rather type fast and as if i were talking to somebody rather then type it like an essay. All my teachers and professors say i write beatifully but whatever
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