Anyone here get bored with sex?

[Mr Ehrmantraut]

Left hand- Adriana Lima, right hand- Brooklyn Decker?

What I'm saying is its pointless discussing topics of a sexual nature here because everyone is so fugging alpha.

[!! Anorak]

One thing - and I don't like to brag - but I consider myself very good at oral sex.

I think of it like Who Wants To Be A Millionaire, where you try and bank 2-3, so even if the sex isn't good, they still can't complain that much. Even if you shoot your load early, they're still going home with those orgasms in your gob as a consolation prize.

However, it sets up too much anticipation, I find. Frankly, I probably give myself an "A" for licking fanny (pussy, Fat Yanks), so after they've flooded my tonsils twice, they're thinking "Christ, that was great oral sex... he must be excellent at penetrative sex."

That's where it all goes wrong.

Never give someone a good time before showing them a bad one. It's like buying them an ice cream then giving them a kick in the ****. Or buying them a Christmas present, only for it to be a piece of dog shit wrapped up.

[kadyo's]

Honestly... it's overrated. I'm not an exercise freak - I must be a fugging BETA - and it's a drain sometimes. Like running a marathon.

Last time I did it, I went through three distinct phases:

Three minutes in - "****, am I gonna cum early and make a twat of myself? Concentrate... concentrate..."

Five minutes in - "Thank God, I don't wanna cum now, I know I can last for ages."

Six minutes in - "Oh ****, now I've got a stitch. I need my second wind."

Ten minutes in - "I'm getting a bit bored now. Wish I'd just had a wank instead."


Plus, it costs me a fortune in candy bars. But what about you guys?

Some details are conspicuously missing here, annie mate, who/what you doing it with?

[!! Anorak]

I did it with this friend of mine, which was a mistake. Never **** with that platonic friend line, eh?

Anyway, sometimes I try and crack a few funnies around sex - which is obviously not a good idea under any circumstances.

We had too much to drink, and were getting a bit steamed up, but she had this cat that, at the inappropriate moment, would keep jumping on my lap.

Now, you personally would have said "do you have any ketchup?" but I decided I'd crack a funny.

The line "shall we make it a threesome then?" did not get a single laugh in that instance.

[kadyo's]

Lol!!!

Got to admit that was hilarious!!! cat gender?

[CANELOLUJAH]

bored of ***** naw, probably bored of the chick but all depends on how I feel. Some days I wake up and want to tear it up like its my first time ever that I got to bang this chick and some days I wake up and just bang to bang.

[Psylence83]

I did it with this friend of mine, which was a mistake. Never **** with that platonic friend line, eh?

Anyway, sometimes I try and crack a few funnies around sex - which is obviously not a good idea under any circumstances.

We had too much to drink, and were getting a bit steamed up, but she had this cat that, at the inappropriate moment, would keep jumping on my lap.

Now, you personally would have said "do you have any ketchup?" but I decided I'd crack a funny.

The line "shall we make it a threesome then?" did not get a single laugh in that instance.

Lmao!!!!
I traveled for a while and lived in a campervan with my dog (amstaff)
Anyway i was riding this english bird, as i started to smash hard he would bark with every slap! By the end i was going hammer and tongs and he was flat out going off!
I came, pulled out and turned round and just said good boy to my dog!
For some reason she thought it was weird, but for me it felt more like me and my boy just destroyed this bird.

[El-blanco]

Lmao!!!!
I traveled for a while and lived in a campervan with my dog (amstaff)
Anyway i was riding this english bird, as i started to smash hard he would bark with every slap! By the end i was going hammer and tongs and he was flat out going off!
I came, pulled out and turned round and just said good boy to my dog!
For some reason she thought it was weird, but for me it felt more like me and my boy just destroyed this bird.

Haha epic ****in post man

[kadyo's]

Lmao!!!!
I traveled for a while and lived in a campervan with my dog (amstaff)
Anyway i was riding this english bird, as i started to smash hard he would bark with every slap! By the end i was going hammer and tongs and he was flat out going off!
I came, pulled out and turned round and just said good boy to my dog!
For some reason she thought it was weird, but for me it felt more like me and my boy just destroyed this bird.

lmao!!! chinga!!!! ahahaha!!!

[Hype job]

Originally Posted by Elroy1 View Post
In fact I have someone hold the bag for me at the gym and wing shots in similarly to Foreman and everybody stopt to watch me do it. They cannot believe how hard I can hit it, much harder than the weight lifters can. It looks and sounds very similar to Foreman here. It simply isn't special at all! The bag isn't hitting back and you just throw everything into it.



I'm rolling!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!