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I don’t get it. I think it’s like, super weird. Since I was 12, or even younger, there has always been a woman who I’ve been fixated with, or who I’ve had a crush on.
I think it’s weird. Almost like a mental abnormality. It’s almost like I subconsciously seek out and attach myself to a woman and it comes off the wrong way and drives away potential partners. I imagine this is why I’m single. Sometimes I act out on these fixations, and other times I don’t, but once I’m fixated on a woman, I can’t move on until a new fixation takes place. There’s always someone who I have a “crush” on.
Its not super consuming in the way that it’s gonna affect my day to day activities. I just think it affects my love life for sure. Like I can go through a list of women who I’ve had a “thing” for. What’s even weirder is that, it’s usually one after another. It’s never 2 at the same time.
Even when I was like, in middle school, I remember there was only 1 or 2 women who I was really really into. Both kind of at the same time, but not really. Then once the one made it clear she wasn’t interested, I moved onto the next one. It’s literally one after another.
Even in 3rd grade, I remember the student teacher who I was in love with. And I made it very obvious too, cuz I was like, 9 yrs old and didn’t know how to act.
Even now most recently, there’s the 19 yr old at the gym. I’ve had a thing for her for awhile now, even though she’s clearly no longer interested and she has had the same boyfriend for at least 5 or 6 months now. This one hurts the most, because I can tell that she was interested in me, but something happened along the way where she lost interest in me. Now I’m still stuck on her and can’t seem to stop thinking about her.
I think it’s weird. Almost like a mental abnormality. It’s almost like I subconsciously seek out and attach myself to a woman and it comes off the wrong way and drives away potential partners. I imagine this is why I’m single. Sometimes I act out on these fixations, and other times I don’t, but once I’m fixated on a woman, I can’t move on until a new fixation takes place. There’s always someone who I have a “crush” on.
Its not super consuming in the way that it’s gonna affect my day to day activities. I just think it affects my love life for sure. Like I can go through a list of women who I’ve had a “thing” for. What’s even weirder is that, it’s usually one after another. It’s never 2 at the same time.
Even when I was like, in middle school, I remember there was only 1 or 2 women who I was really really into. Both kind of at the same time, but not really. Then once the one made it clear she wasn’t interested, I moved onto the next one. It’s literally one after another.
Even in 3rd grade, I remember the student teacher who I was in love with. And I made it very obvious too, cuz I was like, 9 yrs old and didn’t know how to act.
Even now most recently, there’s the 19 yr old at the gym. I’ve had a thing for her for awhile now, even though she’s clearly no longer interested and she has had the same boyfriend for at least 5 or 6 months now. This one hurts the most, because I can tell that she was interested in me, but something happened along the way where she lost interest in me. Now I’m still stuck on her and can’t seem to stop thinking about her.
i_am_a_champ
can write and do pretty much everything left
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