I am starting to doubt my boxing...

[Box"K"ing]

Exactly! The last thing people give up is admitting that you hurt them.. why you think this big mouth was running his mouth? His mouth was his best weapon (discouraged you and ect) and your FIST remains yours. Remember that fighting is just as mental as it is physical. Don't let a man take your heart with his trash talk just do what you do.



Jab... chances are he felt it. But he is not going to admit it to you. Trash talk is just an attempt to disarm you. There IS a reason behind them doing this. And even if they are not hurt, if you catch them with a left hook while they are trash talking, their perceived strength is used AGAINST them. Honestly, if you can land a jab you can land a right. And one of my favorite shots to shake up a larger opponent is a jab/feint jab upstairs, straight right to the gut.. then sit down on a left hook or right uppercut. Any normal Joe will be unmade by this, because they will hunch in over a bit from the spear to the guts you just administered. If they still ain't down from that lead out with a right to the chin... it should connect they will go down.

If you gonna fight (which I agree with Bill should be avoided if possible) cultivate persistance.. determination... When you go after a girl do you take the first no for an answer...no you keep on till you win her over! Same with a fight.. One technique didn't work? Pour out your whole arsenal.. He mentally trying to dominate you? Shatter that with shock and awe..show your training and why you are superior to a normal joe.. that is all my friend.

I never thought about it like that, to be honest with you, one of the reasons why I have lost faith in my self is the fact that I feel intense shame for engaging in a fight that could have been avoided, I let my anger/nerve get the best of me and I feel like a scumbag who doesn't really deserve to participate in boxing and that a person like me is just gonna disgrace real fighters and the culture of boxing which demands people to be strong minded both inside and outside the ring.

[Syf]

Pick up MMA bro. I woulda shot a double, took him down and pounded him out on the floor. MMA works a lot better in the street than boxing does.

Any fighting style can work, with the correct mindset and application.... his strength is boxing.. In a fight he needs to play his strengths. . Take his opponent into his world for a bit.

[Bigg Rigg]

Any fighting style can work, with the correct mindset and application.... his strength is boxing.. In a fight he needs to play his strengths. . Take his opponent into his world for a bit.

I agree with that. I see what you're getting at.

[Syf]

I never thought about it like that, to be honest with you, one of the reasons why I have lost faith in my self is the fact that I feel intense shame for engaging in a fight that could have been avoided, I let my anger/nerve get the best of me and I feel like a scumbag who doesn't really deserve to participate in boxing and that a person like me is just gonna disgrace real fighters and the culture of boxing which demands people to be strong minded both inside and outside the ring.

I get what you are saying...

It's often said amongst fighters that their greatest enemy is themselves. And this is true. You could have all the talent in the world... And train diligently.... But if you are in the way of yourself, only personal ruin can follow.

No one is perfect and everyone makes mistakes... If you've found yourself in a fight, the best thing to do is finish it to the best of your ability and seek atonement and contemplate what you can do differently in future situations.

I've been around the culture you speak of... And honestly no one in a boxing gym is going to fault you too much for scrapping with a loud mouth that probably insulted your honor... A lot of guys in boxing come from humble beginnings where they have to do what they have to do. There is very little judgment to be found because each guy has his story. If you are in the martial art world, such as Kung fu ect... They do frown on unneeded violence, but both worlds frown more on losing faith in yourself. That is something you have to come to terms with by yourself, can't be taught... But I would say the first step should be ridding yourself of guilt.... That can be a heavy burden. Humiliation is another one. You have some toxic emotion that needs to be dealt with before you can progress in your training.

[- Ram Raid -]

Thank you so much to the both of you, now that I think about it, my problem stems from ego. Like you guys said, having an expection of myself isn't gonna equate to reality and how the world works.

In some ways I feel like that Charlie Z clown who overestimates his own skills. I admit, upon self reflection I am a bit of prick now that I think about it and its something I need to work on.


Hopefuly this incident will make me a better human being and a better as well as more respectful boxer.

If you use it as a catalyst to drive change it will become a positive event.

Whilst I understand your angle there are a lot of common notions that we all tap into that hinder us, so this isn't really about your ego as such. And it certainly isn't about you being a prick or a clown (we'll get back to this).

It's important to keep in mind that any occurrence is neutral and lacks form or significance until we attach meaning to it. It's that interpretation that makes the event what it is to you. Your feelings on this aren't stemming from the event, they're stemming from how you are interpreting it and the meaning you're attaching to it. We can't always control the events that happen throughout life. How we interpret them though, is entirely down to us.

So bearing that in mind you'll see that the issue here isn't the event. On a more immediate level it's the meaning you're attaching to it. Behind that though, is the real gist of the problem. You've allowed yourself to get into the mental habit (and that's all it is) of interpreting events in a manner that make you feel worthless. You're passing judgement, belittling and verbally bullying yourself. A + B = That you're a clown and a prick! You may be doing this partly in the misguided belief that it will motivate you. It wont. Psychologically it will produce low confidence and physically it will induce lethargy. It isn't a moral thing, or a personal failing, it's simply a process that you've picked up from those around you and it doesn't work. It isn't fit for purpose and no amount of effort will ever make it so. Discard it.

The first step to doing that is awareness. Catching yourself in those multiple moments throughout the day when you fall into that mental habit. Then, you intervene in a gentle and non-judgemental manner (remember, all you're doing is correcting what has become an automatic response, and it will take time and repetition. Anger and frustration wont aid you here). Intervene by picturing in your minds eye a RED STOP SIGN. Then either replace your negative interpretation with one that is more positive and practical or in the case of verbally belittling yourself simply drop the thought and move on. Do not fully engage and do not argue with yourself. Merely stop & replace or stop, drop & move on.

Negative self talk is one of the most corrosive things you could ever subject yourself to. On a practical level, it does not work. There are far more effective ways of motivating yourself and interpreting the world around you. Once you've taken the time to implement this first step, attaching positive meanings will become as automatic as negative ones are at the moment. You will no longer berate yourself or call yourself names. This will increase your confidence because it's what you're doing at the moment that is causing the lack. Once you've done this first step you'll look for other ways to improve.

With repetition and patience you'll create a very different world to the one you're creating now and your life will become a hell of lot easier once you've gotten yourself off your back. Other people will give you enough **** as it is, don't join in with them.

[Boxing Goat]

Your recollection of the truth is actually a false memory created by your brain to counteract the trauma-induced experience, If you don't realize this now it will destroy you from within. The first step to recovery is admitting defeat, and if it makes you feel any better, there are plenty of people out there who willing drink piss.

Do not fret my brethren, keep calm and carry on!

Thanks for the inept advice complete stranger

[alexguiness]

As a younger man I fought in the street.

Then I discovered Boxing and realized that in a boxing match you are testing yourself in a safer, more controlled environment.

I cannot condone street fighting, too may innocent lives are ruined by trying to prove how bad-ass you are in front of your friends or trying to impress women.

My advice is that if you seek violent confrontation in the street you will eventually find it. Or it will find you...

But you cannot control what the events that follow.

I am not proud of my street-fighting days, but I look back at my boxing with pride and respect.

[billeau2]

As a younger man I fought in the street.

Then I discovered Boxing and realized that in a boxing match you are testing yourself in a safer, more controlled environment.

I cannot condone street fighting, too may innocent lives are ruined by trying to prove how bad-ass you are in front of your friends or trying to impress women.

My advice is that if you seek violent confrontation in the street you will eventually find it. Or it will find you...

But you cannot control what the events that follow.

I am not proud of my street-fighting days, but I look back at my boxing with pride and respect.

The problem is also that as violent as we were when younger men, there was usually (not always) different horses for different courses. In other words, if we had a beef and we hung out in the same circles we would circle up, throw hands, and shake after. Maybe a ko would happen, maybe a broken nose. If I was going into anothr area I would carry a baseball bat because you could get jumped. On the other hand if someone ****d our sister (for example) well again...different mentality different fight.

Thing is in virtually all these situations people had a sense of honor and scale. If you knocked me down you wouldn't generally kick me in the head while I was getting up....Even getting jumped on, you would get a bet down but you could generally walk away from it after, maybe with sore ribs and a busted lip.

Now a days these kids are watching mma and doing horrible things to each other in fights. Frankly now a days I would not let anyone get a chance at getting a hold of me in a fight...People are really devoid of all judgement. You see punks starting **** with a guy and instead of just a punch to the head, or a few, the punk is left unconscious, bleeding, probably with a concussion and never the same....I understand we get what we ask for but thats overkill in my opinion.

I tell my kids that its not like my time....no fights and if anyone threatens you do whatever it takes to keep safe.

[PainfromUkraine]

Bit of advice - don't jab to the head in street fights...it's not going to have much impact, isn't going to score you points and you are much better off throwing a jab to the body - the solar plexus to be precise. If you connect solidly, you will have not only the surprise factor (as the natural inclination and assumption of your opponent will be to punch to the head), but also possibly incapacitate or at least wind your opponent.

This allows some time to get in close and grapple if you choose, or grab hold behind the neck as he doubles over or leans down and get a few knees into the body...it's a lot less hassle than swinging for the head, leaving yourself open and potentially suffering hand damage if you connect with a sharp bit of the face or perhaps a tooth.

Or if you really want to punch, take the opportunity and throw a hook or uppercut. Jab to the head in the street fight? Definite no-no.

Moral of the story - there's a much bigger target downstairs....use it.

[LacedUp]

Haha, apparently everyone is supposed to posses a Wladimir type jab.

Measuring distance and tap him a million times on the forehead?

impressive.....