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An event in your life you will never forget that defined you as a person?

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  • An event in your life you will never forget that defined you as a person?

    Something you will never forget... Something that taught you about yourself, what you are about, made of, needed to get through, etc.

    I have two. This one triggered me today lol, watching a video of the South Bronx. I will share this first one to start things off:

    My dad and I would take long walks all over New York City. I am talking like 30 miles sometimes! I was a tough kid, and my it was a great way to spend time with my old man... Well on one of our walks we were in the Bronx, and the Bronx seems to go on for ever. Same buildings, stretching block to block...We would also walk to Yankee stadium from East Harlem through the Bronx. We saw a stray dog and I asked my dad can we feed it? He went to buy some dog food, and the dog got chased away...

    I felt so bad for that dog. I really cried, I felt like I had let it down, and just so bad for all the strays. My old man, bless him, understood and was with me, didn't castigate me for being so upset. Since that day I made my mind up to do what I could for dogs. I have two rescue boys now and will always, as long as I am here, have a rescue dog, one at least in this house.

    Every time I see the Bronx i get a memory and it makes me very sad. I mean...New York and all the cities are doing amazing and much better things for animals and that is great. But I really wish I could have helped that stray dog, and frankly it still hurts.

  • #2
    Where are you from in the Bronx, my family lives on Colgate Ave.




    Well the first thing that changed me was my first firefight in Afghan. I was only 19. I've never seen anyone killed before and it was pretty bad. Lost a good friend.





    Second was my father passing away. I tried my best to care for him but he just couldn't hang in there.

    He told me he wanted to pass and I would just tell him shut up, you're going to be alright. We both knew he was going to pass soon I just didn't want to admit it to myself.
    Last edited by Beercules; 12-14-2019, 03:30 PM.

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    • #3
      Certain life events really mold you. Takes time to recover half of the time but we get there eventually.

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      • #4
        Originally posted by Beercules View Post
        Where are you from in the Bronx, my family lives on Colgate Ave.




        Well the first thing that changed me was my first firefight in Afghan. I was only 19. I've never seen anyone killed before and it was pretty bad. Lost a good friend.





        Second was my father passing away. I tried my best to care for him but he just couldn't hang in there.

        He told me he wanted to pass and I would just tell him shut up, you're going to be alright. We both knew he was going to pass soon I just didn't want to admit it to myself.
        Im reading your post and just feeling for you. 19 is so young to deal with such a situation. I know that had to be tough. Glad you are here to tell us about it bro.

        On your dad. Yeah I had a rough time with my dad's passing. My dad was sharp as a tack and started losing his cognition. He was 91... He was really difficult for my mother who is 14 years younger and was just getting sick of him. Well my mother had to have a surgery and asked Dad to go into a facility for a while, a nice place...really nice. My dad of course wanted to be home with my mother. So... My mother comes back from surgery and for the next few months asks my dad to stay put while she recovers. I know she does not want him home and is shining him on. I don't know what exactly to do though. He is a handful, yet it is his house...but mom does not want to be with him and he knows it, and she is not even trying to fake it, just shining him on.

        So I am in the middle, trying to do right by my mother and father. I feel bad and I can see that my dad does not trust me anymore, and I am trying to figure out what to do to make them both happy...i get the phone call at about 5am in the morning. Mind you my dad was very healthy physically. He went out of the room walking around, fell and died.

        Beercules I still cannot grieve, happened a year or so back...I feel like I let him down. Just that look in his eyes. I just hope you could tell your dad you loved him and that he knew that was true.

        Oh almost forgot. I am from Manhattan. i know colgate ave though lol, I know the Bronx pretty well. We just used to walk to Yankee stadium from 97th street and Park/Madison avenue.
        Last edited by billeau2; 12-14-2019, 09:09 PM.

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        • #5
          Originally posted by Beercules View Post
          Certain life events really mold you. Takes time to recover half of the time but we get there eventually.
          Its good to hear you say that. I believe it.

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          • #6
            There was no single event. It was just a lifetime of growing up in a dumpy tenement in Brooklyn. The good, bag and ugly of growing up poor in a rough neighborhood shaped my perspective through life. As I got older I could draw strength from having survived hardship, violence, hunger and going without. Despite all the challenges, there were also fond memories of childhood friends, stickball in the streets, girlfriends, cooling off under the hydrants on hot summer days, my first car, night games at Shea Stadium, exploring the city at all hours day and night. If I had to choose one defining moment I would say the death of my father. It was that experience that sealed my disbelief in God. It would later be quantified by the death of a son.

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            • #7
              a divorce changed me , it showed me alot of things , became stronger and wiser.

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              • #8
                Great thread.

                I would say flunking out of Usmc basic training. For the longest time I wanted to be a marine. About a month or so of experiencing home sickness I stopped receiving orders and SI’ed my way out. Been about 4 years and it still haunts me, I went out like a *****.

                I’m a stronger man because of it but hell of life doesn’t have painful ways of teaching a simple lesson.

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                • #9
                  Originally posted by billeau2 View Post
                  Something you will never forget... Something that taught you about yourself, what you are about, made of, needed to get through, etc.

                  I have two. This one triggered me today lol, watching a video of the South Bronx. I will share this first one to start things off:

                  My dad and I would take long walks all over New York City. I am talking like 30 miles sometimes! I was a tough kid, and my it was a great way to spend time with my old man... Well on one of our walks we were in the Bronx, and the Bronx seems to go on for ever. Same buildings, stretching block to block...We would also walk to Yankee stadium from East Harlem through the Bronx. We saw a stray dog and I asked my dad can we feed it? He went to buy some dog food, and the dog got chased away...

                  I felt so bad for that dog. I really cried, I felt like I had let it down, and just so bad for all the strays. My old man, bless him, understood and was with me, didn't castigate me for being so upset. Since that day I made my mind up to do what I could for dogs. I have two rescue boys now and will always, as long as I am here, have a rescue dog, one at least in this house.

                  Every time I see the Bronx i get a memory and it makes me very sad. I mean...New York and all the cities are doing amazing and much better things for animals and that is great. But I really wish I could have helped that stray dog, and frankly it still hurts.
                  Seemingly ordinary encounter with a stray, yet a profound experience for some. It’s such a mystery to me how basic events we all go through produce different experiences in all of us. I admit Ive never saved a dog but that doesn’t mean I do hurt for them. Anyway I really enjoyed this post!

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                  • #10
                    When I saw my 1st full on pron....changed how I looked at women forever.

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