Relax Club invitation requirements

[Monaco Slim]

How can I be a part of the relax club???

So I've been bombarded all week with private messages and quotes asking how to join ever since I announced the privatization, so I'll clear it all up in this thread.

The only way you people can potentially be invited is if you meet all the following requirements.

1. You're a grown up, an adult, someone who doesn't waste his precious time exercising, instead you enjoy RELAXING.

2. Every week you do a FULL SHOP at M&S, Waitrose or the American equivalent

3. You only read the time from a Rolex, AP, JLC, VC, Patek or Richard Mille. If you try and sneak in with an Omega or even less then you will be politely escorted out.

4. You don't watch movies, that's for children, adult entertainment only.

5. MINGLING with the ELITES and participating in eyes wide shut orgies really TICKLES YOUR FANCY. Every 6 months we will sacrifice one poster to the relax gods.

6. You wouldn't be caught dead at cheap 3 star resorts in Spain, instead you enjoy relaxing at st regis mauritius.

7. You bought your luxury car with the amount of taxes you avoided paying in the last few years

8. You don't mind paying to get your dick sucked

9. You prefer to PURCHASE your friends

10. You enjoy Monaco GP weekends and Le mans 24h whilst having an intellectual discussion about the battle of Waterloo

[*TonyMontana*]

So I've been bombarded all week with private messages and quotes asking how to join ever since I announced the privatization, so I'll clear it all up in this thread.

The only way you people can potentially be invited is if you meet all the following requirements.

1. You're a grown up, an adult, someone who doesn't waste his precious time exercising, instead you enjoy RELAXING.

2. Every week you do a FULL SHOP at M&S, Waitrose or the American equivalent

3. You only read the time from a Rolex, AP, JLC, VC, Patek or Richard Mille. If you try and sneak in with an Omega or even less then you will be politely escorted out.

4. You don't watch movies, that's for children, adult entertainment only.

5. MINGLING with the ELITES and participating in eyes wide shut orgies really TICKLES YOUR FANCY. Every 6 months we will sacrifice one poster to the relax gods.

6. You wouldn't be caught dead at cheap 3 star resorts in Spain, instead you enjoy relaxing at st regis mauritius.

7. You bought your luxury car with the amount of taxes you avoided paying in the last few years

8. You don't mind paying to get your dick sucked

9. You prefer to PURCHASE your friends

10. You enjoy Monaco GP weekends and Le mans 24h whilst having an intellectual discussion about the battle of Waterloo

But how would we know about eyes wide shut if we don't watch movies
Mr slim?

[Monaco Slim]

But how would we know about eyes wide shut if we don't watch movies
Mr slim?

You just don't understand the difference between movies and art

[*TonyMontana*]

You just don't understand the difference between movies and art

Haha touche

[b Murphington]

When I'm a work, I don't work. Instead, I find a bathroom and I masturbate, because I don't feel like working. I'm perfect for this group.

[Monaco Slim]

When I'm a work, I don't work. Instead, I find a bathroom and I masturbate, because I don't feel like working. I'm perfect for this group.

You sound like someone that I can relax with, I'll send the invite