Here it is, folks... the "LOUNGE BULL**** OF THE WEEK" thread

[Drunken Cat]

We've got some more gold here, and, for once, I'm ****ing speechless:

I love how it suddenly changes to a travel advice post toward the end of it. I guess Old Joe just needs a travel buddy. Nothing wrong with that, mind you.

[joe strong]

I love how it suddenly changes to a travel advice post toward the end of it. I guess Old Joe just needs a travel buddy. Nothing wrong with that, mind you.

what are you talking about? it was from another thread where a guy said he would fly anyone on his concord to knock them out...

[Drunken Cat]

what are you talking about? it was from another thread where a guy said he would fly anyone on his concord to knock them out...

I was just joking. The way you wrote, toward the end you were writing about airlines so it seemed like travel advice.

I was just joking. The way you wrote, toward the end you were writing about airlines so it seemed like travel advice.

You did well, son, good effort.


But look alive, everybody, I've found a fresh batch.

Actually, it's not that fresh... I was offline over December, so somehow missed this classic piece of bullshit. And not from the lounge, so technically it doesn't count, but this gem came from the Thunderdome:

I've been arrested 3 times. Possession of Marijuana and Alcohol under 21, Battery, and aggravated assault

Here's my battery mugshot at the bottom of this post, and I had my aggravated assault expunged because that was recent and the most serious, I had just graduated college and was looking for a job, which I did get.

Miami-Dade Penitentiary isn't a ****ing joke. Meat *****- Ass wouldn't last a day in there. Meat wouldn't last an hour in my world.

You don't get any free shots with me. If you want to war with me, you need to accept firsthand that there will be consequences, and they're not going to be consquences you're going to like. Nobody in the world is scared of meat. I would spit in his face and **** his sister in front of him because I know he wouldn't do **** to me. Wolves don't fear sheep.

I've never bent over for anybody in my life, I've never accepted defeat, and I never stop fighting for what I want until I get it. That's never going to change until somebody takes my life.

Mait can't even get ****ing laid. No Girl wants to be with a soft, weak midget who doesn't know how to be a man. That's why this ***** jacks off so much and knows so much about ****.

Now, Righteous is my boy but that is some Grade A classic bull**** right there, 24 carat proof.

First of all, the guy had a recent assault charge on his record, but they wiped it because he'd finished college and was looking for a job... join me as I say "WTF???"

Can you imagine how that interview played out?


"What can I do for ya, son?"




"Ahhhhhhh... ahhhhhhhhhh... me assaurt someone, but it nothing pelsonar, I just ahhhhhhhhh agglivated. But now I want job. Can you ahhhhhhhhhh just folget about assaurt chalge?"




"Uh.... sure. But if I do that I want you to do a favor for me first - bend over, drop your pants and I'll let you experience what a normal-sized cock feels like for the first time in your life."


If that's how you imagined it, then shame on you, because that's racist. Plus, it appears Righteous wouldn't indulge in such a scenario:

I've never bent over for anybody in my life, I've never accepted defeat, and I never stop fighting for what I want until I get it. That's never going to change until somebody takes my life.

Holy shit, folks, it's like Charles Bronson butt fucked John Wayne and they shat out a nuclear-radiated badass. Have you seen the new trailer for the Godzilla movie? Godzilla would watch Mrs. Godzilla having her scales fucked (albeit by a 2inch pecker) and just stand there like a dumb shit, too scared to so much as waggle his tail. If the T-1000 came back in time and Righteous was his target, he'd take a shit in his pants, pack up his crap and head right back to Skynet. "Mission Report: I've fuckin' shit meself, he's an internet bad ass."

This is a man who lays his life on the line every day of the week and doesn't take no for an answer... then logs onto the internet to post on messageboards for 15 hours straight, before heading down to pick up his welfare check.

It's some fine bullshit, ladies and gentlemen - but is he your bullshitter of the week?

[rorymac]

I've also seen the mugshot from his alcohol/marijuana arrest. I used to think he lied about literally everything, but at least this much is true. Now that I know what he looks like I think I kinda like him. No ****. (I give it a couple of days before I start tearing my hair out at his religious/self-improvement threads again)

Anyway, hilarious post. Especially the Terminator bit.

[[ DUBBZZ ]]

you did well, son, good effort.


But look alive, everybody, i've found a fresh batch.

Actually, it's not that fresh... I was offline over december, so somehow missed this classic piece of bullshit. And not from the lounge, so technically it doesn't count, but this gem came from the thunderdome:



Now, righteous is my boy but that is some grade a classic bull**** right there, 24 carat proof.

First of all, the guy had a recent assault charge on his record, but they wiped it because he'd finished college and was looking for a job... Join me as i say "wtf???"

can you imagine how that interview played out?


"what can i do for ya, son?"




"ahhhhhhh... Ahhhhhhhhhh... Me assaurt someone, but it nothing pelsonar, i just ahhhhhhhhh agglivated. But now i want job. Can you ahhhhhhhhhh just folget about assaurt chalge?"




"uh.... Sure. But if i do that i want you to do a favor for me first - bend over, drop your pants and i'll let you experience what a normal-sized cock feels like for the first time in your life."


if that's how you imagined it, then shame on you, because that's racist. Plus, it appears righteous wouldn't indulge in such a scenario:




Holy shit, folks, it's like charles bronson butt fucked john wayne and they shat out a nuclear-radiated badass. Have you seen the new trailer for the godzilla movie? Godzilla would watch mrs. Godzilla having her scales fucked (albeit by a 2inch pecker) and just stand there like a dumb shit, too scared to so much as waggle his tail. If the t-1000 came back in time and righteous was his target, he'd take a shit in his pants, pack up his crap and head right back to skynet. "mission report: I've fuckin' shit meself, he's an internet bad ass."

this is a man who lays his life on the line every day of the week and doesn't take no for an answer... Then logs onto the internet to post on messageboards for 15 hours straight, before heading down to pick up his welfare check.

It's some fine bullshit, ladies and gentlemen - but is he your bullshitter of the week?

lmao!!!!!!!

Well **** me, that one died on its ass, didn't it?

[Xyei]

Well **** me, that one died on its ass, didn't it?

Because everyone is too terrified to post a I, for one, don't want to risk my life by laughing at the guy. There would be consequences for such action.

[BUNGALOWS]

You did well, son, good effort.


But look alive, everybody, I've found a fresh batch.

Actually, it's not that fresh... I was offline over December, so somehow missed this classic piece of bullshit. And not from the lounge, so technically it doesn't count, but this gem came from the Thunderdome:



Now, Righteous is my boy but that is some Grade A classic bull**** right there, 24 carat proof.

First of all, the guy had a recent assault charge on his record, but they wiped it because he'd finished college and was looking for a job... join me as I say "WTF???"

Can you imagine how that interview played out?


"What can I do for ya, son?"




"Ahhhhhhh... ahhhhhhhhhh... me assaurt someone, but it nothing pelsonar, I just ahhhhhhhhh agglivated. But now I want job. Can you ahhhhhhhhhh just folget about assaurt chalge?"




"Uh.... sure. But if I do that I want you to do a favor for me first - bend over, drop your pants and I'll let you experience what a normal-sized cock feels like for the first time in your life."


If that's how you imagined it, then shame on you, because that's racist. Plus, it appears Righteous wouldn't indulge in such a scenario:




Holy shit, folks, it's like Charles Bronson butt fucked John Wayne and they shat out a nuclear-radiated badass. Have you seen the new trailer for the Godzilla movie? Godzilla would watch Mrs. Godzilla having her scales fucked (albeit by a 2inch pecker) and just stand there like a dumb shit, too scared to so much as waggle his tail. If the T-1000 came back in time and Righteous was his target, he'd take a shit in his pants, pack up his crap and head right back to Skynet. "Mission Report: I've fuckin' shit meself, he's an internet bad ass."

This is a man who lays his life on the line every day of the week and doesn't take no for an answer... then logs onto the internet to post on messageboards for 15 hours straight, before heading down to pick up his welfare check.

It's some fine bullshit, ladies and gentlemen - but is he your bullshitter of the week?

I fuggin died when I read this!!!

[DARKSEID]

Anorak you don't even have a job.. How would you know how the real world works when your mom pays all your bills? Let me school you anyway.

If you present your case to a respected employer, and prove your capability and ambition, some of them will overlook your history, because they're human too and some of them made the same mistakes you did and will take a chance on you if you've proven that you're the best man for the job.

Yet another reason why I believe in God, because when I was t rock bottom after I got out of jail for the 3rd time, my Family hated me, My friends hated me, My Ex's hated me, My girl left me, I was broke, I couldn't a job higher than minimum wage because of my criminal history, I had no place to live, I was facing nothing but homelessness, death or jail.

But I kept fighting. I begged my cousin to let me stay with him, I got a few part time jobs, I got a roomate, met some new friends met a new girl, I finished school, and I landed a job I never could have imagined I would get.

There are so many times where I should have been counted out but I'm still here stronger than ever, despite all odds.

Literally anything is possible if you don't give up.