How To Get To Heaven When You Die

[xfrodobagginsx]

Jesus left to prepare a place for His people in heaven. He left His Holy Spirit with us. All believer's recieve the Holy Spirit. He is coming again for His people.

[Clegg]

I see no holy spirit. Is it too small to see? Like the floating tea pot?

[Murray]

To get to heaven you need to vote for McCain!

[The Noose]

Jesus...save me from your followers.

[xfrodobagginsx]

[xfrodobagginsx]

Please take the time to read this first post and pray that prayer to God at the bottom of it if you haven't yet.

[Iamnotausername]

Please take the time to read this first post and pray that prayer to God at the bottom of it if you haven't yet.

I want to get to heaven, but I dont wanna waste time being good to people and praying. Suggest any shortcuts?

Dont say Repent before you die cos I cant be arsed to do that either!

[Clegg]

I want to get to heaven, but I dont wanna waste time being good to people and praying. Suggest any shortcuts?

Dont say Repent before you die cos I cant be arsed to do that either!

Maybe try shagging a nun?

[ßringer]

Yeah and he created the entire Earth in 7 days, man existed alongsie Dinosaurs, Jonah lived in the belly of a whale, snakes talked, people who work on Sunday should be stoned to death, Children who talk back should have their tongues ripped out, and the following contradictions.....

"For I am merciful, saith the Lord, and I will not keep anger forever." (Jeremiah 3:12)
"Ye have kindled a fire in mine anger, which shall burn forever." (Jeremiah 17:4) "

""If I testify about myself, my testimony is not valid." (John 5:31)
"Jesus answered: Even if I testify on my own behalf, my testimony is valid." (John 8:14) "

"And Jesus said, "For judgement I am come into this world." (John 9:39)
"I came not to judge the world" (John 12:47) "

"We should fear God (Matthew 10:28)
We should love God (Matthew 22:37)
There is no fear in love (1 John 4:18) "

what's it like to live your entire life based on the writings of a few men who's combined intellect couldn't figure out how to operate a blender?

..........Still waiting for your response frodo.

[AFTER HOURS]

people loves fairy tales