That Max Kellerman post-bout interview as it really happened...

[Guest]

Have you ever seen this:

I felt sorry for Max there... he looked like he'd pissed in his pants.

I bet inside he was thinking "I WISH this GUY was BLACK."

[Guest]

He will never grow on me, I can't stand him. He's like an atrophied/methed out vanilla ice who painfully over-pronounces every word with more than 3 syllables because he thinks he's a "wordsmith".

Larry Merchant was the ATG behind JR.

Yeah, age caught up with poor old Larry. I started to feel bad when I was watching the twelfth round of a fight and Merchant was finishing off a point he was making about the opening round.

But in his day, Max wasn't fit to suck his ****.

[Aztekkas]

Yeah, age caught up with poor old Larry. I started to feel bad when I was watching the twelfth round of a fight and Merchant was finishing off a point he was making about the opening round.

But in his day, Max wasn't fit to suck his ****.

Perfection. Euphoric. Fedora.

[RightJabLikeZab]

Idk. Praising Kovalev and then talking to bernard telling him he was beat up and abused sounds pretty unbiased and straight to the point to me.

[Guest]

You guys are looking for something that isn't there. Your sensitivity levels are off the charts. Weened of the tit a bit too young, eh?

Yeah, age caught up with poor old Larry. I started to feel bad when I was watching the twelfth round of a fight and Merchant was finishing off a point he was making about the opening round.

But in his day, Max wasn't fit to suck his ****.

Max probably wouldn't want to. He'd be eyeing some big black stallion instead.

[mrpain81]

What's strange is if you watch Max on other shows or his radio program, he isn't even the same guy. On HBO he's trying to play his part as Merchant jr but he couldn't carry his jockstrap.

As much as Lampley gets shit for his cheer leading and Roy for his early signs of dementia, Kellerman is the guy who consistently shits the bed.

[Sweet Pea 50]

Yeah, age caught up with poor old Larry. I started to feel bad when I was watching the twelfth round of a fight and Merchant was finishing off a point he was making about the opening round.
But in his day, Max wasn't fit to suck his ****.

You ever have the pleasure of listening to Larry and Bob "The Colonel" Sheridan do a telecast?

Larry: Gin and Tonic. Wet. Boxing is an abomination that the Black Pope sitting as the head of the Catholic Church can appreciate. I still love Shane Mosley.

Bob: Great bunch of people, those Thai. Not a bad lady-boy in that bunch, let me tell ya. Did I tell ya the time I Eiffel Towered Moneesha with Fidel Castro? Was in a Super 8 out on route 41. Nice towels.

[Dr Rumack]

You ever have the pleasure of listening to Larry and Bob "The Colonel" Sheridan do a telecast?

Larry: Gin and Tonic. Wet. Boxing is an abomination that the Black Pope sitting as the head of the Catholic Church can appreciate. I still love Shane Mosley.

Bob: Great bunch of people, those Thai. Not a bad lady-boy in that bunch, let me tell ya. Did I tell ya the time I Eiffel Towered Moneesha with Fidel Castro? Was in a Super 8 out on route 41. Nice towels.

[Guest]

I feel bad for the Colonel... you listen to a prime Colonel and he's so sharp and on tack it's unreal.

But listen to him today and he sounds like bewildered ****er that's just been let out of the old folk's home and doesn't know where he is.

[Butt stuff]

"Sergei... you just beat a black boxer, and that's caused me to lose my erection. I'm so depressed I'm nearly in tears, and it's making me forget to do that weird over-enunciating thing I always do. I may even top myself afterwards. Please... at least tell me he hurt you with a punch or something... anything you can do to try and help me get an erection again in the next month. Otherwise I think I may be impotent for life just thinking about it. Seriously, I might cry if I don't stop this interview."



"BerNARD, I can almost FEEL my erection coming BACK just TALKING to YOU. Don't FORGET that you are OLD, and thereFORE that's a valid REASON for you LOSING this FIGHT, and means I can STILL go HOME and hope to develop an ERECTION. In that LAST ROUND you TOOK so many PUNCHES and he STILL couldn't KNOCK you OUT. I'm GUSHING over THAT just like a FANBOY. Please, will you TOUCH me below my WAIST, I'm actually ABOUT to CUM in my PANTS. I LOVE boxers who are BLACK. Even in DEFEAT you're a GREAT GUY. Look at YOU, shaking Kovalev's HAND. You're so AMAZING I may TAKE YOU in my MOUTH right NOW."

crying.