Tweet
My top fears remaining
1) People knowing im affected and bothered by black male sexuality, I can tell u now not sure why I get affected in the moment its some kind of performance anxiety about being unattractive or not winning emotionally ie remaining happy attractive and winning (think admitting it may help? Will see)
(oddly watching anything alone with black ppl in it doesn't bother me
2) Anxiety when talking to people I really like, always men, I get intense anxiety if they are someone I like, I totally avoid them never see them again if this happens
3) Men different than me esp black men being picked as a preference over me its like a big rejection
4) White people going extinct like the red Indians have (almost)
Those are the only things really that bother me and its only 1 that does in a persistent way the rest are not bad at all.
The worst one is over with boy that was a persistent nightmare. Also my anxiety in general has diminished alot, just not with nice people.
1) People knowing im affected and bothered by black male sexuality, I can tell u now not sure why I get affected in the moment its some kind of performance anxiety about being unattractive or not winning emotionally ie remaining happy attractive and winning (think admitting it may help? Will see)
(oddly watching anything alone with black ppl in it doesn't bother me
2) Anxiety when talking to people I really like, always men, I get intense anxiety if they are someone I like, I totally avoid them never see them again if this happens
3) Men different than me esp black men being picked as a preference over me its like a big rejection
4) White people going extinct like the red Indians have (almost)
Those are the only things really that bother me and its only 1 that does in a persistent way the rest are not bad at all.
The worst one is over with boy that was a persistent nightmare. Also my anxiety in general has diminished alot, just not with nice people.