An appointment with Bermane Stiverne

[!! Anorak]

This is the problem with boxing today.... the standards have fallen so low (unless you're Elroy, natch) that we're now giving boxers credit for getting repeatedly punched in the face.

I dunno what made that fat **** slower than a zombie Carl Froch in a coma... it was either the 85 buffet meals in his great big fat ****ing gut (six pack, Fat Yanks), or a massive pay check from Don King in his back pocket.

Seriously, I'll put down £20 on any man that TRIES. But if by "tries", you mean "trudges around like an obese mummy and uses his face as a catcher's mitt for 12 rounds" then he can **** off, the fat ****.

Honestly, at times last night I thought someone had let a whale escape in that ****ing ring. Deontay didn't need his jab... he needed a ****ing harpoon.

[!! Anorak]

I remember once arguing with someone in NSB because they called me a liar when I said I KNEW that Tarver would beat Royston "Roy" Jones Jr. in their second fight before the first bell even took place. They said I had no way of knowing that Tarver would KO him in two and that I was lying.

Now, I never SAID I knew Tarver would KO him (the strawman argument being the nature of all of NSB, of course) just that I knew Tarver would WIN. After all, it was arguable he won the first fight anyway, so it wasn't like a major stretch, was it?

But I knew, because THEY knew. Tarver had a look on his face, and Royston had a "I haven't got any excuses tonight, I think I'm gonna lose this cunt" look on his.

It's like they say, sometimes boxers just KNOW. Other recent bouts where this has been apparent have been Calzaghe vs Lacy (I was already thinking up NSB pwn before the first bell rang, it was written all over Lacy's face in his ring walk, his confidence wasn't there for whatever reason) and... fuck it, I had another example, a recent one, but it's gone out of my head for now.


Anyway, have you seen ANYONE this side of Frank Bruno in the second Tyson bout look more CERTAIN that they're going to lose that Bermane "Fat CUNT" Stiverne did last night?

I didn't make the mistake of putting £20 ($26, Fat Yanks) on him a second time. But even when he's in the ring he's practically crying to his team "how many seconds of consciousness am I going to have, mang? Shall I just let him KO me right away, or try to last ten seconds?"


I go for a walk in a local park where people take their dogs. You'll always see one dog drop in front of another, putting its tail between its legs and bowing to the other one, whimpering. That's what Stiverne was like last night. In fact, if you turn the volume up you can even hear him whisper "don'tsa worry, bwoss, I won't dare throw any punches back."

How out of shape was that fat cunt? The commentators kept remarking on how it was supposed to be Ortiz in the ring tonight, but Luiz Ortiz WAS in the ring.... Stiverne had eaten him.

Bermane Stiverne is the kind of guy who, if he was round your house and accidentally said the N word in front of him, you'd apologise, and say "sorry, Bermane, even though you did once cost me £20, I didn't realise you were there." and he'd go "it'sa okay masser, say it again, please - I'sa sure loves to hear it - YES SUH!" He's the kind of guy that would whip himself just to save you the trouble.


What a total cunt.

[BostonGuy]

lol at you two saying bermane stiverne wasn't trying to win last night.

He literally did not land one punch. He came into the fight out of shape and unmotivated. If he was trying to win, it sure didn't look it...

[!! Anorak]

He literally did not land one punch. He came into the fight out of shape and unmotivated. If he was trying to win, it sure didn't look it...

To be fair, stub arms was talking about the FIRST fight there.

[Mr Ehrmantraut]

He literally did not land one punch. He came into the fight out of shape and unmotivated. If he was trying to win, it sure didn't look it...

He's talking about the first fight, check the post dates.

What's a matter with you?, you're falling apart without alcohol. You need a beer kid.

[Sweet Pea 50]

Can't really take too much out of last night. Stiverne was clearly not at his best both mind and body. Wilder did what he was supposed to do, and left him looking like he was slumped in a Lazy Boy watching a All in the Family marathon.

[Szef]

How he stood there, in the centre of the ring, waiting for Stiverne after the first KD was pretty cool, I must admit.

[Thraxox]

Ahahahahahahahahahaha

[BoxingFan85]

All that water weight made Stiverne wobbly..

[Sparked_26]

I usually feel sorry for boxers who get sparked in a round. You think about the tough gym sessions they must have done, all that roadwork, and at the lighter weights all the food deprivation.

But Stiverne didn't do any of that shit did he?

The man claimed to have an eaten a breakfast that made him put on like 20 pounds when interviewed by HBO minutes before the fight. Dude must been hooked up to a whale fat IV, the tubby blimp.

Wilder says every one is scared of him. I doubt it. He's the lazy man's choice. Nobody is gonna withhold your purse if you get folded up like an origami fat cunt.