Tweet
7 The newbie
Young men, there will inevitably be a time where a trip to the strip club is your first. Some, like myself, describe it as paradise. Others say it’s like a land filled with milk and honey. Either way, cherish that moment. You’ll be nervous, you’ll be afraid to stare, but fear not young lad. The price of admission gives you the unalienable right to ogle at your leisure. Pretty sure I saw that in the Bill of Rights.
The bachelor party
No bachelor party is complete without a heavily inebriated trip to a gentleman’s club. This group is impossible to miss. They travel at least 10 deep and nary a one of them is sober. Often times the bachelor is thrown on stage amidst a throng of strippers and you’ll see more of him than you’d ever hoped for. Moreover, if all of you leave together and somehow make it back to the hotel alive, consider it a miracle.
5 The A-holes that bring women
Shame on you, shame on all of you who have ever considered bringing a woman to our domain. If by chance, your wife ever asks you if she can join you at the strip club, the first word out of your mouth should be “Divorce”. Plain and simple. We go to see half-naked women and get away from our significant others. The last thing any of us want to see is your stupid wife/girlfriend in her mom jeans telling you not to ogle.
4 The wife beater
Inevitably, you’ll run into this guy almost every time you walk in to a club. He parades around in a wife beater or tank top in the lame hopes that his tatted up arm will catch the strippers attention (as if the ladies care about anything but money). Listen buddy, I came to see scantily clad strippers. Is it too much to ask to throw on a t-shirt, perhaps even a polo?
3 The creepy dude who comes by himself
It’s ok to stare, it’s even ok to gawk at the women. But when the bouncer comes over because you poke, prod, and fondle every stripper that walks by you and otherwise scare the hell out of the rest of the patrons, that’s a problem. Thankfully, these types of guys travel by their lonesome, so kicking them out without causing too much of a scene isn’t a problem. Here’s an idea buddy, rent a **** and go to town. Keep the creepy stuff to the sanctity of your own home.
2 The business suit guys
For some reason, this type of guy was often associated with horny Japanese businessmen. But as time goes on, others have picked up on this popular fad. Whether you make $200k a year or even $20k, dressing the part at the strip club helps in getting extra special attention from the ladies. Because surely, a man in flip-flops and shorts doesn’t nearly have the same, how shall we say, je ne sais quoi, that a man in fine Italian silk has.
1 The sports watcher
Unfortunately, we’ve all been there. A buddy has a bad week and he drags you (although, not much convincing is needed) for a night of adult entertainment. By man law, you’re obligated to go. And while you love the ladies, you find yourself peeking at that basketball game that you dropped 100 bucks on. Don’t fret, this doesn’t mean you bat for the other team (not that there’s anything wrong with that). If this happens less than 10% of the time, you’re in the clear. Otherwise, your friends may have to question your loyalty.
http://guyism.com/lifestyle/people-y...mens-club.html
If I had to pick, I'd say I'm the Bachelor party type but minus getting a lot of lap dances.
Young men, there will inevitably be a time where a trip to the strip club is your first. Some, like myself, describe it as paradise. Others say it’s like a land filled with milk and honey. Either way, cherish that moment. You’ll be nervous, you’ll be afraid to stare, but fear not young lad. The price of admission gives you the unalienable right to ogle at your leisure. Pretty sure I saw that in the Bill of Rights.
The bachelor party
No bachelor party is complete without a heavily inebriated trip to a gentleman’s club. This group is impossible to miss. They travel at least 10 deep and nary a one of them is sober. Often times the bachelor is thrown on stage amidst a throng of strippers and you’ll see more of him than you’d ever hoped for. Moreover, if all of you leave together and somehow make it back to the hotel alive, consider it a miracle.
5 The A-holes that bring women
Shame on you, shame on all of you who have ever considered bringing a woman to our domain. If by chance, your wife ever asks you if she can join you at the strip club, the first word out of your mouth should be “Divorce”. Plain and simple. We go to see half-naked women and get away from our significant others. The last thing any of us want to see is your stupid wife/girlfriend in her mom jeans telling you not to ogle.
4 The wife beater
Inevitably, you’ll run into this guy almost every time you walk in to a club. He parades around in a wife beater or tank top in the lame hopes that his tatted up arm will catch the strippers attention (as if the ladies care about anything but money). Listen buddy, I came to see scantily clad strippers. Is it too much to ask to throw on a t-shirt, perhaps even a polo?
3 The creepy dude who comes by himself
It’s ok to stare, it’s even ok to gawk at the women. But when the bouncer comes over because you poke, prod, and fondle every stripper that walks by you and otherwise scare the hell out of the rest of the patrons, that’s a problem. Thankfully, these types of guys travel by their lonesome, so kicking them out without causing too much of a scene isn’t a problem. Here’s an idea buddy, rent a **** and go to town. Keep the creepy stuff to the sanctity of your own home.
2 The business suit guys
For some reason, this type of guy was often associated with horny Japanese businessmen. But as time goes on, others have picked up on this popular fad. Whether you make $200k a year or even $20k, dressing the part at the strip club helps in getting extra special attention from the ladies. Because surely, a man in flip-flops and shorts doesn’t nearly have the same, how shall we say, je ne sais quoi, that a man in fine Italian silk has.
1 The sports watcher
Unfortunately, we’ve all been there. A buddy has a bad week and he drags you (although, not much convincing is needed) for a night of adult entertainment. By man law, you’re obligated to go. And while you love the ladies, you find yourself peeking at that basketball game that you dropped 100 bucks on. Don’t fret, this doesn’t mean you bat for the other team (not that there’s anything wrong with that). If this happens less than 10% of the time, you’re in the clear. Otherwise, your friends may have to question your loyalty.
http://guyism.com/lifestyle/people-y...mens-club.html
If I had to pick, I'd say I'm the Bachelor party type but minus getting a lot of lap dances.
How many are there of these things?
Comment