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10 Moves That Make Manny Pacquiao An American Idol
10 Moves That Make Manny Pacquiao An American Idol
by Michael Marley
May 10, 10:58 AM
I worked my way through a cushy course entitled “Meteorology 101” at the Harvard of Northern Nevada, meaning University of Nevada, Reno.
Fondly I remember our discussions of the various clouds including my favorite, the circulus nimbus.
But, like to paraphrase a fight fan and better poet than Floyd Mayweather Sr. name of Bob Dylan, you don’t have to be a skilled, trainer weatherman to forecast the May weather.
Sorry, I don’t mean this month’s temperatures I mean the Mayweather forecast.
When he fights Manny Pacquiao, the forecast is pain, extreme pain. I don’t mean the high pitched voice of T Pain, either.
I mean the kind of a pain that a “Pretty Boy” who is so vain that he probably thinks that this column is about him will find hard to tolerate.
But, as per usual, I digress.
My main subjects today, are the Things That Megamanny Pacquiao Must Do To Become An American Icon:
1. He just had a grip and grin with former President Clinton but now you can tell your mama that Manny needs to meet up with *****. Wouldn’t it be a nice and fitting touch if this former resident of an archipelago called Indonesia invited the Favorite Son of an archipelago known as the Philippines to the Formerly White but now Black and White House. Maybe Packy’s kids can romp with Sasha and Malia and I bet Jinkee and Michelle would hit it off. I bet Bob Arum buddy Brian Greenspun could make this happen.
2. Oprah, Oprah, Oprah. Manny needs to hit the couch and tell his inspiring rags to riches life story.
3. . I know he doesn’t follow the NFL but Pacman would do well to hit the Super Bowl scene.
4. . Take the family to Disneyland and make sure it is pictorially recorded. Mickey Mouse, you’ll notice, moves his rodent head more than Ricky Hatton does.
5. Become a dual citizen, swearing allegiance to this country and gladdening the heart of every Fil-Am.
6. Go to Canastota, NY, which is a small town treat to visit in June. Sure, Manny won’t be a landslide entrant into the International Boxing Hall Of Fame until five years after ring retirement but he should go now to get the flavor of Ed Brophy’s bastion of fistic accomplishments.
7. Celebrate July 4th after becoming a dual citizen and be con****uously seen eating hot dogs, not real dogs, and enjoying some fireworks. It’s the ultimate American holiday. Repeat after me, Manny…baseball, hot dogs and apple pie.
8. . More couch surfing action. The Jay Leno and David Letterman late night shows are made to order for the Pinoy Idol.
9. Now that he’s sharpening his karaoke skills, how about a guest shot on “American Idol?” I would love to Simon Cowell cower!
10. . Become a member of Red Sox Nation and abandon those trifling Giants. Why would Manny want to be associated, even tangentially, with BALCO slugger Barry Bonds (you know what I mean, Sugar Shane Mosley). Besides, my Main Man-ny, not only would this warm my heart it would gladden Coach and Boston Boy Freddie Roach. You’re already known as a Shamrockian, meaning a Celtics fan so add in the Olde Town Team and the Patriots as well. I will explain the Bruins and ice hockey some other time, pal. Maybe I will compare a floored Hatton to a Human Zamboni machine, something like that.
Michael is a former sports columnist at the New York Post. He was a criminal defense attorney and worked for sports legends Howard Cosell and Don King.
by Michael Marley
May 10, 10:58 AM
I worked my way through a cushy course entitled “Meteorology 101” at the Harvard of Northern Nevada, meaning University of Nevada, Reno.
Fondly I remember our discussions of the various clouds including my favorite, the circulus nimbus.
But, like to paraphrase a fight fan and better poet than Floyd Mayweather Sr. name of Bob Dylan, you don’t have to be a skilled, trainer weatherman to forecast the May weather.
Sorry, I don’t mean this month’s temperatures I mean the Mayweather forecast.
When he fights Manny Pacquiao, the forecast is pain, extreme pain. I don’t mean the high pitched voice of T Pain, either.
I mean the kind of a pain that a “Pretty Boy” who is so vain that he probably thinks that this column is about him will find hard to tolerate.
But, as per usual, I digress.
My main subjects today, are the Things That Megamanny Pacquiao Must Do To Become An American Icon:
1. He just had a grip and grin with former President Clinton but now you can tell your mama that Manny needs to meet up with *****. Wouldn’t it be a nice and fitting touch if this former resident of an archipelago called Indonesia invited the Favorite Son of an archipelago known as the Philippines to the Formerly White but now Black and White House. Maybe Packy’s kids can romp with Sasha and Malia and I bet Jinkee and Michelle would hit it off. I bet Bob Arum buddy Brian Greenspun could make this happen.
2. Oprah, Oprah, Oprah. Manny needs to hit the couch and tell his inspiring rags to riches life story.
3. . I know he doesn’t follow the NFL but Pacman would do well to hit the Super Bowl scene.
4. . Take the family to Disneyland and make sure it is pictorially recorded. Mickey Mouse, you’ll notice, moves his rodent head more than Ricky Hatton does.
5. Become a dual citizen, swearing allegiance to this country and gladdening the heart of every Fil-Am.
6. Go to Canastota, NY, which is a small town treat to visit in June. Sure, Manny won’t be a landslide entrant into the International Boxing Hall Of Fame until five years after ring retirement but he should go now to get the flavor of Ed Brophy’s bastion of fistic accomplishments.
7. Celebrate July 4th after becoming a dual citizen and be con****uously seen eating hot dogs, not real dogs, and enjoying some fireworks. It’s the ultimate American holiday. Repeat after me, Manny…baseball, hot dogs and apple pie.
8. . More couch surfing action. The Jay Leno and David Letterman late night shows are made to order for the Pinoy Idol.
9. Now that he’s sharpening his karaoke skills, how about a guest shot on “American Idol?” I would love to Simon Cowell cower!
10. . Become a member of Red Sox Nation and abandon those trifling Giants. Why would Manny want to be associated, even tangentially, with BALCO slugger Barry Bonds (you know what I mean, Sugar Shane Mosley). Besides, my Main Man-ny, not only would this warm my heart it would gladden Coach and Boston Boy Freddie Roach. You’re already known as a Shamrockian, meaning a Celtics fan so add in the Olde Town Team and the Patriots as well. I will explain the Bruins and ice hockey some other time, pal. Maybe I will compare a floored Hatton to a Human Zamboni machine, something like that.
Michael is a former sports columnist at the New York Post. He was a criminal defense attorney and worked for sports legends Howard Cosell and Don King.