By Thomas Gerbasi
In a boxer’s life there are dreams and then there’s reality. You chase one, while keeping the other at bay for as long as you can, and if they ever intersect, choices must be made. For Danny O’Connor, his dream of chasing a world championship and the reality of raising a family hit the crossroads after a particularly brutal stretch a couple years ago.
Working with renowned trainer Ronnie Shields in Texas, O’Connor was far away from his home in New England, where his wife and young son lived, but to get to the next level of his career, it was the price the three had to pay.
“Basically, I was living there because I was trying to be active, and if you want to be at this level, honestly, you make a lot of sacrifices in life,” O’Connor said. “And unfortunately, the people that mean most to you sometimes have to take a back seat to that.”
In 2013, O’Connor, a promising welterweight, fought five times, winning four, with the only loss a larcenous decision against former world champion Vivian Harris. His biggest fight was outside the ring though, as he tried to keep his family life together any way he could. He tells a story of what went on over one six-week training camp stretch.
“I was driving to the airport in Texas after my Saturday workout with coach Ronnie, flying home to Boston, getting off the train at 12 o’clock at night, getting about two hours with my family and barely even that because (his son) Liam was only three at the time so he couldn’t stay up. Then I would get on the plane Sunday morning at 6am, and fly back to Texas to be in training camp for Monday morning. And I did that for about a month and a half, and that was just to try and save my family, to do both.”
Finally, it was too much, and the dream gave way to reality. His choice was a simple one.
“I’m lucky that my family loves me so much and blessed me that they did allow me to go after this dream, but it was putting so much strain on my marriage and my family that there had to be a choice to be made, and there was no way that it was going to be boxing over my family.”
It wasn’t just a gutsy move, it was a heroic one, the kind of decision movies get made about one day. Walking away with a 23-2 record, the 29-year-old O’Connor was in his physical prime, and while there were no guarantees when it came to him ever winning a world title, you knew that with a few more wins he was likely going to at least get a shot at it, and sometimes, that’s all a fighter needs. But there are more important things than glory, and the Framingham, Massachusetts native had his priorities in the right place.
“I love boxing,” he said. “I love competing, I love the thrill of the fight, I love everything about it. This is my passion. It’s never a day of work for me and it’s what I enjoy doing. But at the end of the day, it’s just a sport, and my family – my wife, my children – mean more to me than anything else. There’s no comparison.”
This Saturday in Boston, Danny O’Connor will face Chris Gilbert in an eight-round bout at the Agganis Arena. It’s the third fight in his return to the ring following knockout victories over Andrew Farmer and Michael Clark. So how did he get back here? With a little help from his friends, including Dropkick Murphys founder Ken Casey, a friend and promoter who knew there was a way for O’Connor to make this whole boxing thing work at home.
“When I had the choice to re-strategize my plan and do it the way I wanted to do it, from Boston with my family, I couldn’t be happier,” O’Connor said. “I love it. I’m extremely focused as a person – I don’t drink, I don’t smoke, I don’t go out. All I do is spend time with my family and train.”
And after the two comeback wins, O’Connor – who now trains with Hector Bermudez – was presented with the biggest fight of his career, a May 29 bout in Brooklyn against former world champion Paulie Malignaggi. But just as quickly as the opportunity was presented, it was gone, as Malignaggi suffered a cut that saw the bout get scrapped. O’Connor took the news remarkably well.
“I looked at it (the Malignaggi fight) as I had put so much work in, so much sacrifice into this sport, and this was my opportunity that I had been working for my whole career and my whole life. That’s what it was. But I don’t cry over spilled milk,” the 30-year-old said. “It is what it is, and I have the tools mentally and physically to adapt and overcome. Challenges are going to come up and you either have to go with them or against them, and I’m definitely with them. Would I have loved to fight Paul? Absolutely. But I don’t plan life and I definitely don’t control it. I just control how I react to it, so this train’s keeping moving, Paul or no Paul.”
Luckily, with the card in Boston coming up this Saturday, O’Connor was a natural to be put on the card, and though it’s a week earlier against an opponent who doesn’t have the resume of a Malignaggi, it’s a fight, and “Danny Bhoy” was happy to take it.
“The initial disappointment (of losing the Malignaggi fight) comes from the thought that I was going to be robbed of my chance to compete,” he said. “You have to understand, I love what I do, I love boxing, and being in the ring and performing, that’s when I feel alive. So when that’s threatened, it’s going to make me sad and there was disappointment, but with the opportunity to get back on the show in Boston and still have my chance to compete, it was a no brainer.”
But does he think a fight with the “Magic Man” will ever materialize?
“I haven’t even put thought into it,” O’Connor said. “It doesn’t matter. It’s not what the focus is now. My focus is on Saturday night and Chris Gilbert, and if it happens, it happens. If it doesn’t, I’ll deal with it. I’m equipped to handle any situation that may arise. But I hope so. If I could be the one controlling it, I would hope that Paul would be a man of his word and give me my shot when he’s healed up. But I’m not putting any thought into it.”
He’s not even looking past Saturday, even though most would believe that at this point, the light at the end of the tunnel for O’Connor’s career is now a bright one.
“If I worry about the end of the tunnel, I’m not going to be thinking about what’s happening right now,” he said. “I’m very calculated about staying in the moment, and that light at the end of the tunnel is me at home with my family, and that’s the only picture that I really do care about. I’m having fun, I’m doing what I love to do, and I’m working as hard as I can. Other than that, the outcome is out of my control. I just do what I can do.”