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I just don't know what to do about this fool anymore. He's going to be 28 years old and all he does is smoke weed and play XBOX. He's completely ruining my parents lives and is a serious strain on everyone in our family. Anyone else have a family member like this?
He's just the textbook definition of a **** up. I let him get an apartment with me after my fiance and I split over the summer, so he could move out of my parents house (!) and I could kinda take him off their hands for a while. He has a job that I got him, but they don't give him more than 10 days of work a month so he's always broke. He has no motivation to accomplish anything in life.
The thing is, he should! He's really intelligent and not bad looking. He's just so smug and thinks he's so much better than everyone that he needs to prove nothing. Case in point: I'm hitting the dating scene really hard and bring girls back to our place a lot. He has a girlfriend that he's referred to as "fat, stupid, obnoxious personality, hates talking to" ect. She filthy and gross. They've been dating like 2 years, but I've only seen her twice because he's obviously ashamed to bring her around. He always talks of breaking up with her, but he's too much of a coward to.
I try to tell him that he's not bad looking, but you cant attract a woman by wearing old dirty clothes that are way too big and playing video games. But he won't confront any problems. He just makes up all these stories about "hot *****es" he ****ed, when in reality she's probably the first girl he'd ****ed in 3-4 years. When it comes to admitting shortcomings he always lays the blame on my parents. We had plenty of eat, nice clothes, and love and support of two parents who worked hard. That's better than 99% of the children in this world.
His life is completely passing him by. It's ruining my parents lives. They're immigrants and don't have a lot of education, but work really hard and don't know what to do about their eldest son. Everytime my mom, dad, sister, and I get together with one another, he is the main subject of discussion. We don't know what to do, because honestly if he wasn't living with one of us he would probably become a homeless person. My mother told me one day that if she didn't love him so much, she'd have the courage to tell him that she's been all over the world and in 58 years she'd never seen as big a loser as him in her entire life.
I am moving to Chicago or Minneapolis in November, and I'm trying to force some sort of solution on him. I hate to leave him back on my parents shoulders, who say they cannot support him at all financially anymore, but I have a college degree and have to go further my career and get my masters. Just this month he borrowed his half of the rent from my mother, and told her it was money we "both" needed for expenses. He has no shame and accepts none of his faults.
Anyone have any thoughts, stories, or suggestions? I hate to think that he will always be this way, but he doesn't have much time left and hasn't shown any signs he wants to turn his life around.
He's just the textbook definition of a **** up. I let him get an apartment with me after my fiance and I split over the summer, so he could move out of my parents house (!) and I could kinda take him off their hands for a while. He has a job that I got him, but they don't give him more than 10 days of work a month so he's always broke. He has no motivation to accomplish anything in life.
The thing is, he should! He's really intelligent and not bad looking. He's just so smug and thinks he's so much better than everyone that he needs to prove nothing. Case in point: I'm hitting the dating scene really hard and bring girls back to our place a lot. He has a girlfriend that he's referred to as "fat, stupid, obnoxious personality, hates talking to" ect. She filthy and gross. They've been dating like 2 years, but I've only seen her twice because he's obviously ashamed to bring her around. He always talks of breaking up with her, but he's too much of a coward to.
I try to tell him that he's not bad looking, but you cant attract a woman by wearing old dirty clothes that are way too big and playing video games. But he won't confront any problems. He just makes up all these stories about "hot *****es" he ****ed, when in reality she's probably the first girl he'd ****ed in 3-4 years. When it comes to admitting shortcomings he always lays the blame on my parents. We had plenty of eat, nice clothes, and love and support of two parents who worked hard. That's better than 99% of the children in this world.
His life is completely passing him by. It's ruining my parents lives. They're immigrants and don't have a lot of education, but work really hard and don't know what to do about their eldest son. Everytime my mom, dad, sister, and I get together with one another, he is the main subject of discussion. We don't know what to do, because honestly if he wasn't living with one of us he would probably become a homeless person. My mother told me one day that if she didn't love him so much, she'd have the courage to tell him that she's been all over the world and in 58 years she'd never seen as big a loser as him in her entire life.
I am moving to Chicago or Minneapolis in November, and I'm trying to force some sort of solution on him. I hate to leave him back on my parents shoulders, who say they cannot support him at all financially anymore, but I have a college degree and have to go further my career and get my masters. Just this month he borrowed his half of the rent from my mother, and told her it was money we "both" needed for expenses. He has no shame and accepts none of his faults.
Anyone have any thoughts, stories, or suggestions? I hate to think that he will always be this way, but he doesn't have much time left and hasn't shown any signs he wants to turn his life around.
No words needed.........
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