Originally posted by ted*.
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These 4 Limeys are Wankers
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Lineker - fancy a quick pint after the show Garth?
Crooks - let me answer your question by establishing a few fundamental, philosophical building blocks young Gary. I have an abiding penchant for Guinness and this particularly nutrious and historically and culturally important Irish stout needs to be poured slowly, savoured and therefore does not belong to the quick pint school of social and convival drinking.
Did James Joyce slurp a pint of Guinness whilst penning Ulysses, I rather think not! He appreciated this dark, bitter and poetic drink. Tragedy and comdedy followed Joyce everywhere and I raise a glass to salute his genius.
Lineker - so you want a Guinness then?
Crooks - want is a judgmental and controversial word young Gary, it suggests a dependency and a lack of inner-discipline on my part. Let us look at a more appropriate, precise and mature term to frame this discussion. A Guinnness would be enjoyable and stimulating at this particular juncture and enable us to discuss art, great literature and whether Jose Mourinho is actually Machiavelli in a tracksuit.
Lineker - do you want a pint or not you verbose, pompous twat?
Crooks - young Gary, I shall quaff and generally partake of a half.
Lineker - packet of crisps as well?
Crooks - you raising an interesting and important question Gary....
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