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Things you do in private that you wouldn't do in public
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Scratch my balls freely.
It rarely ever happens, but every now and then you get one of those ball itches in public you just gotta do something about. My strategy for that situation is to either slink out of sight briefly or wait for a diversion to avert everybody's attention so I can stealthily slip my right hand into my pants pocket and give 'er a quick scratch.
Don't act like you've never done it before.
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