There are several girls at work who look at me. Some of them smile at me.
I am hesitant to smile back because I've been hurt in the past. I don't open myself up because I don't want to put myself in a situation where I am vulnerable and could get hurt.
I appear confident and happy but inside I am sad and bankrupt.
I'm crying right now.
How can find the courage to smile back?
It's my birthday and I'm crying.
I'm sipping on lean, trying to forget about all the missed opportunities I've had with women.
I want to smile at her but inside I am destroyed. The pain from the past weighs heavy on my spirit.
I just look at her.
She looks at me.
And I just look at her.
And look at her.
Inside it kills me.
I want to smile, but I can't.
I just can't.
How can I find the strength to smile at her?
Because it's not in my heart. I've been hurt too many times.
I don't want to break. I'm about to break.
You see, this big, tall, strong tough man is fragile. He is about to break.
Please help me. I'm at war with myself.
Comment