Am I ****ed up??

[Sin City]

Because I know someone who could be dying in one of the worst ways imaginable and don't feel sorry? I have lost people close to me before and have been around death and seen awful things happen before to people when I didn't want to. I'm thinking maybe I have become immune to it.. But I see death as part of life and we all have to go through it. I know a person who is very close to me who's mother might have caught HIV from cheating on her husband so much.. I am sad and **** because I don't like to see that person sad and love that person but I think her mother deserved it for all the horrible things shes done all the lies and the cheating. I see this is karma or something balancing itself out.. Am I wrong for thinking this way? People are telling me I'm ****ed up for thinking like this. I am going through a ****ty time because I don't like seeing people I love suffer but I could care less about that persons mom.

[eazy_mas]

Because I know someone who could be dying in one of the worst ways imaginable and don't feel sorry? I have lost people close to me before and have been around death and seen awful things happen before to people when I didn't want to. I'm thinking maybe I have become immune to it.. But I see death as part of life and we all have to go through it. I know a person who is very close to me who's mother might have caught HIV from cheating on her husband so much.. I am sad and **** because I don't like to see that person sad and love that person but I think her mother deserved it for all the horrible things shes done all the lies and the cheating. I see this is karma or something balancing itself out.. Am I wrong for thinking this way? People are telling me I'm ****ed up for thinking like this. I am going through a ****ty time because I don't like seeing people I love suffer but I could care less about that persons mom.

Death is just nature of life you could be sad abit it okay. I remebered seeing something in anime Naruto ( dont laugh ) where a villian loves memorials because he says once someone died everything you though about him bad turns too good but that no alway for all people.

you could tell if a person is loved or hate by the number of people attending there funureal and stuff like that.

anyway people die in dozens everywhere around the world but maybe you are no so attacted to them you dont feel much but for example if someone you really really love and you been through alot you would feel sad

[Sin City]

Death is just nature of life you could be sad abit it okay. I remebered seeing something in anime Naruto ( dont laugh ) where a villian loves memorials because he says once someone died everything you though about him bad turns too good but that no alway for all people.

you could tell if a person is loved or hate by the number of people attending there funureal and stuff like that.

anyway people die in dozens everywhere around the world but maybe you are no so attacted to them you dont feel much but for example if someone you really really love and you been through alot you would feel sad

Yah me and her mom aren't close infact we don't get along at all for certain reasons. But I love her and she loves her mom and is going through the most horrible time and its making my life ****ed too... I dunno what to do. Theres nothing we can do...I try to comfort her but its not working.

[eazy_mas]

Yah me and her mom aren't close infact we don't get along at all for certain reasons. But I love her and she loves her mom and is going through the most horrible time and its making my life ****ed too... I dunno what to do. Theres nothing we can do...I try to comfort her but its not working.

these stuff needs time maybe couple of weeks til thing go normal.

maybe the best thing to do is act abit normal and not completely and go out with her after week of the funeral. try not to make thing worst and choose you words right before smoothing her because any words could be mis-interputed espically because her mother died of HIV and not something normal or naturel death as it seemed.

[Sin City]

these stuff needs time maybe couple of weeks til thing go normal.

maybe the best thing to do is act abit normal and not completely and go out with her after week of the funeral. try not to make thing worst and choose you words right before smoothing her because any words could be mis-interputed espically because her mother died of HIV and not something normal or naturel death as it seemed.

No dude we think shes has HIV and if so she is pretty much slowley dying but is not dead yet.. well atleast we think she is.. She gets the results back tommarow but she pretty much has all the symptoms and the doctors had detected something unusual in her blood thats why they wanted to run the tests.. We just thought she was getting very sick but she came out with it today.

[eazy_mas]

No dude we think shes has HIV and if so she is pretty much slowley dying but is not dead yet.. well atleast we think she is.. She gets the results back tommarow but she pretty much has all the symptoms and the doctors had detected something unusual in her blood thats why they wanted to run the tests.. We just thought she was getting very sick but she came out with it today.

we that is a hard sitaution.

look at postive thing in life. tell here there is people who lived for 20years with aids and still living.

nobody knows when he is going to die so its best for her to live her life to the fullest and try to complish things because people are not measured by the lenghth of the lives but by the compleishment that they do in it.

if you become active AIDs wont be controling you life or anything external but if you internal desroyed than that is a hard thing because nobody could help you in there except for youself

[The Noose]

I dont see why u have told people ur theory on it being karma. That was probably a bad move.
The ONLY thing that matters is that u are there for ur friend wen she needs u, and u let her know that.

Its not ****ed up that u feel nothing for the mother. Ur not close to her. I have had similar experiences with family who have died and ive felt next to nothing. I get more upset watching films! Death is a strange this to deal with.

[K-DOGG]

Because I know someone who could be dying in one of the worst ways imaginable and don't feel sorry? I have lost people close to me before and have been around death and seen awful things happen before to people when I didn't want to. I'm thinking maybe I have become immune to it.. But I see death as part of life and we all have to go through it. I know a person who is very close to me who's mother might have caught HIV from cheating on her husband so much.. I am sad and **** because I don't like to see that person sad and love that person but I think her mother deserved it for all the horrible things shes done all the lies and the cheating. I see this is karma or something balancing itself out.. Am I wrong for thinking this way? People are telling me I'm ****ed up for thinking like this. I am going through a ****ty time because I don't like seeing people I love suffer but I could care less about that persons mom.

Well, if you are, then I'm in the same boat. I understand the emotional, or lack of emotional state of which you speak. I've just found it's sometimes best not to express these feelings to those who are close to the person afflicted or dying because most people are very emotionally attached, while others are rational and have it all in context in an almost disconnected way. You are aware of what's going on and have expressed your logic.....and I, for one, understand. Death is a part of Life and we will all go through that door sooner or later.

So, in short, No...I don't think you're ****ed up. You just need to be more sensitve to those who view life and death from a more "conventional" state of mind.

[Scottie2Hottie]

yeah, youre not ****ed up, but you ****ed up when you started sayin you didnt really feel bad.

as far as im concerned, even if karma is balancing itself, you should always show respect to someone thats on their way out. theyve already gotta worry about makin their peace with the big man.

[Sin City]

I dont see why u have told people ur theory on it being karma. That was probably a bad move.
The ONLY thing that matters is that u are there for ur friend wen she needs u, and u let her know that.

Its not ****ed up that u feel nothing for the mother. Ur not close to her. I have had similar experiences with family who have died and ive felt next to nothing. I get more upset watching films! Death is a strange this to deal with.

Nah dude I didn't tell her that, I wasn't gonna be messed up and say something like that to someone who is wrecked right now, I did tell her people live a long time with aids and what eazy mas said about living life to the fullest. I left her house though and was on the phone with another friend and she asked if I wasn't the least bit sad and I told her no, So she said I was cold hearted because that was a human being dying and I should have sympathy no matter what they have done in life. So that got me thinking...am I really thinking about death all wrong or am I messed up for thinking the way I do about it..