[HOLY S**T!] How do Christians do it???

[The Noose]

So i thought id give the New Testament a go, and read Mathew....

And this is how the story starts!......

Matthew 1

1The book of the generation of Jesus Christ, the son of David, the son of Abraham.

2Abraham begat Isaac; and Isaac begat Jacob; and Jacob begat Judas and his brethren;

3And Judas begat Phares and Zara of Thamar; and Phares begat Esrom; and Esrom begat Aram;

4And Aram begat Aminadab; and Aminadab begat Naasson; and Naasson begat Salmon;

5And Salmon begat Booz of Rachab; and Booz begat Obed of Ruth; and Obed begat Jesse;

6And Jesse begat David the king; and David the king begat Solomon of her that had been the wife of Urias;

7And Solomon begat Roboam; and Roboam begat Abia; and Abia begat Asa;

8And Asa begat Josaphat; and Josaphat begat Joram; and Joram begat Ozias;

9And Ozias begat Joatham; and Joatham begat Achaz; and Achaz begat Ezekias;

10And Ezekias begat Manasses; and Manasses begat Amon; and Amon begat Josias;

11And Josias begat Jechonias and his brethren, about the time they were carried away to Babylon:

12And after they were brought to Babylon, Jechonias begat Salathiel; and Salathiel begat Zorobabel;

13And Zorobabel begat Abiud; and Abiud begat Eliakim; and Eliakim begat Azor;

14And Azor begat Sadoc; and Sadoc begat Achim; and Achim begat Eliud;

15And Eliud begat Eleazar; and Eleazar begat Matthan; and Matthan begat Jacob;

16And Jacob begat Joseph the husband of Mary, of whom was born Jesus, who is called Christ.

Im not good with names for a start, but this wasnt exactly the enthralling page turner id hoped for.

They should have started out with the crucifixion briefly before jumping back to his birth so as to lure the reader forward. Or made it in 2 parts. The sequel could be called "Jesus: The Beginning".
Like they did with StarWars.

[Everywhere]

Christians do it in the missionary position for the sole purpose of procreation.

[The Noose]

Christians do it in the missionary position for the sole purpose of procreation.

Perv.

[Miburo]

The genealogy was obviously given to add legitimacy to the figure. Common in many religions/mythologies/cultures. The Gospel of Matthew was written specifically for a Jewish audience, for whom such a thing would be of extreme importance (i.e. that the messiah "king" is descended from the actual ancient kings, fulfilling prophecies, etc.).

[cupocity303]

Are you trying to outdo and take Squelpiggy's Atheist World Heavyweight Championship?

[Jim Jeffries]

I would have to be extremely bored to read even one page of the bible.

[The Noose]

are you trying to outdo and take squelpiggy's atheist world heavyweight championship?

.blasphemy!!!!!