Bookmark Website  | Free Registration  | The Team
The Lounge  | Champions  | The Wire |  Schedule |  Audio  |  Arcade  |  The Top Ten  |  Historical  |  Email  |  Video

Gastro-Physics And Dietary Anti-Matter


Do a little people-watching, next time you're in the grocery line. There's always someone with a cart, bulging with every conceivable kind of diet food. Flats of turkey bacon prop listlessly against the fat free half & half and Olestra cookies. At first glance, this is clearly someone who is completely health conscious, diet minded, and watching what they eat.

But peek beneath the basket to the lower rack - where you normally find dog food, kitty litter, and toxic chemicals - and you will see the full case of Mountain Dew. Diet foods and junk foods, rubbing wrappers in the very same cart might suggest mental illness, delusional optimism, or some other form of brain strain.

However, unbeknownst to the rest of us, these folks are actually brilliant physicists, cleverly disguised as profoundly confused shoppers, so as not to attract any attention. They throw you off their trail with very characteristic behaviors, like chasing a candy bar with a Diet Coke.

Yes, we can now release the fact that these scientists are members of the little know branch of their field known as gastro-physics, and they are actually testing a high-level theory regarding matter and anti-matter. Just as matter can be annihilated by anti-matter, they show how calories can be eliminated, obliterated, and just forgotten about altogether if you just consume them with their Universal opposite.

Oreos and skim milk cancel perfectly.

M&Ms are vaporized into the next astral plane when thrown into a trail mix bag with a few Spanish peanuts.

And then there's diet drinks ? the perfect dietary anti-matter for any form of plasticized fruit rollup, gummy worms, or even weight loss candy bars.

Sorry for the dive into the messy scientific details, but there's just a bit more you should know about this physics phenomenon. The calorie cancellation must happen within a certain time frame, if you are serious about blipping away that ingot of taffy you just ate.

It's like your mother explained, logically, that swimming after quick a baloney and cheese sandwich at the beach will make you drop like a rock to the bottom of the ocean, unless you wait the required 30 minutes or so.

In just the same way, modern gastro-physicists indicate that full cancellation can only take effect if the diet product smashes into the junk food within 7.45 minutes. These guys are brilliant.

So the next time you see cleverly disguised gastro-physicists chasing their Snickers with a Diet Coke, don't harrumph. They're not as daft as they seem.

About The Author

Dr. Will Clower is the award-winning author of The Fat Fallacy and founder of The PATH Curriculum, The PATH Online, and Newsletter.

The PATH: America's weight solution.

Dr. Clower can be reached on his website www.fatfallacy.com. willclower@fatfallacy.com


MORE RESOURCES:

Health regulators approve stomach balloon weight loss aid
CBS News
WASHINGTON -- Federal health regulators on Tuesday approved an inflatable medical balloon that aids weight loss by filling up space in the stomach. The Food and Drug Administration cleared Reshape Medical's balloon as another option for millions of ...

and more »


KTRK-TV

New vBloc weight loss surgery transmits signal to brain
KTRK-TV
The excessive weight Adams gained during the past 15 years, as well as its health implications, forced her to explore weight-loss surgery options. She opted for the new route, and became the first person in the Tri-State area to undergo the VBloc Therapy.



Why the most popular rule of weight loss is completely wrong
Washington Post (blog)
The much bigger mistake Wishnofsky made was misunderstanding how our bodies react to weight loss. As soon as we start cutting calories from our diet, the number of calories our body expends begins to fall. "It literally starts happening on the first ...

and more »


kjrh.com

'My organs were shutting down:' 10News investigates agency booking weight loss ...
kjrh.com
SAN DIEGO - 2 Works for You sister station, 10News, has learned new information about a weight loss doctor accused of injuring people and the agency that continues to send patients to him. Dozens of people from all across the country told 10News they ...
'My organs were shutting down:' Investigating agency booking weight loss ...WKBW-TV

all 3 news articles »


WOODTV.com

The key to lasting weight loss
WOODTV.com
The Weight Management Program uses a team approach to achieve long-term weight loss. Physicians, psychologists, nutritionists, and athletic trainers work together with the patient for a full spectrum of services. Many of the participants have reduced ...



Heavy.com

Rachel Paul, 'Extreme Weight Loss' 2015: 5 Fast Facts You Need to Know
Heavy.com
Rachel Paul is a participant on the 2015 season of Extreme Weight Loss. Read on for our 5 Fast Facts on Paul and her episode below. 1. Rachel Paul Is A Former UCLA Cheerleader. Rachel Paul, Rachel Extreme Weight Loss, Extreme Weight Loss 2015, ...
Santa Monica Woman To Star On ABC's "Extreme Weight Loss" Episode TonightSanta Monica Mirror
Tragedy Strikes Ex-College Cheerleader on 'Extreme Weight Loss'Yahoo News
Scoop: EXTREME WEIGHT LOSS on ABC - Tuesday, August 11, 2015Broadway World

all 10 news articles »


Q13 FOX

Woman accused of faking weight loss shares brave photo to silence 'haters'
Q13 FOX
A New Zealand-based makeup stylist who shared photos of her dramatic weight loss on social media is getting worldwide attention after she posted an “after” photo showing her excess skin to silence the “haters.” Simone Pretscherer Anderson said she went ...
Woman posts bravely honest weight loss photos to silence online hatersMashable

all 41 news articles »


Entertainment Tonight

Liam Neeson's Shocking Weight Loss Leaves Him Nearly Unrecognizable in NYC
Entertainment Tonight
While the actor has not commented on his weight loss, he did reveal in March that he plans to quit the wildly popular Taken franchise within the next few years. Perhaps Neeson just doesn't see the need to bulk up for the film role anymore, or maybe he ...
Is Liam Neeson sick? Rep says pic of weight loss, frail frame shows healthy starExaminer.com

all 103 news articles »


10News

'My organs were shutting down:' Team 10 investigates agency booking weight ...
10News
Dozens of people from all across the country told Team 10 they were sold on a surgery by Weight Loss Agents -- the Florida-based, self-proclaimed Medical Tourism agency. When these people had serious complications, some even dying after the weight ...



13newsnow.com

Making Your Mark: Army Strong" weight loss wonder
13newsnow.com
Making Your Mark: Army Strong" weight loss wonder. Suffolk -- What do you do at 4 am? Since December, 19 year-old Taisha Hawks has gotten up, and has gone running. Then comes the rest of the day. Loading… Post to Facebook. Making Your Mark: Army ...


Google News


Advertisement



Section Site Map - Submit News - Feedback - Comments - Advertise with Us

Copyright © 2006 Luminati Inc. All rights reserved.