|The Lounge | Champions | The Wire | Schedule | Audio | Arcade | The Top Ten | Historical | Email | Video|
Self-Improvement-Inspiration: How to Exit Your Own Rat Race
We can all get in a rut from time to time. Who hasn't had a moment in their lives where you've asked yourself the question: "Why am I doing this?"
Whether it's who you've become, the business you are in, your career, relationships, where you live or all of the above - sometimes you realise you're just not where you want to be - and you're not sure how you got there! It sure feels like your own version of a rat race though.
If where you want to be in your life is not where you are, then maybe it's time for you to drop out of your very own rat race. We are conditioned into believing that we must continue to strive, to take more on, and to do more, in order to be "successful". But this is a limited and ultimately self-defeating definition. If we can only be more successful by what and how much we do, then we have created our own treadmills to run on.
1. Redefine Success
Redefining success for yourself can be the first step in taking a fresh perspective. Try this exercise by completing the following sentence. " I know I am successful when??." You man not complete the sentence with anything to do with work or material goods. Here are some examples. I know I am successful when?
?I laugh every day with my children
?I bounce out of bed enthusiastically every morning
?all of my relationships give me great joy
?I inspire others to make positive changes
By redefining what we believe makes us successful, we begin to strive for different things in our lives. This can be instrumental in slowing down the treadmill enough for us to take stock of where we are.
2. Springclean your mind
If you feel as though you don't have time for anything - especially thinking about ways to do things differently - it's time for a time-out.
When we are busy and occupied all the time, we are usually reacting to things going on around us, rather than acting out of choice. So make an active choice to take a rest, a vacation, talk it out with someone you trust, blow off steam, do whatever it takes to get some perspective about your situation.
Just this simple step will make you feel more in control, and can help to streamline the energy you'll need for the changes ahead. The idea is not to just get out of your rat race but to go towards a more fulfilling way of living
3. Get real
The reality is that you can't change anyone else's behaviour but your own. So it's a good time to stop wishing that people would act differently so that you could feel better. Also, it's time to make alternative plans just in case you don't win the lottery or get a salary increase.
This sounds harsh, but people who wait for things to happen to them are usually waiting a long time. Don't wait for chance or fate to step in. Figure out what it will cost (in time, energy, money, etc.) to make the changes you know you need to make. Then figure out what it will cost not to.
4. Pack light
There's something very cathartic about taking time to clean things out - getting rid of the old to make way for the new. You could start with a room in your house, your email address list, or old beliefs that aren't adding value to you any more.
In every situation there is a good lesson to take with you - something of value to keep. Even if it's only, 'Well that's a place I know I never want to be again'. There is always something worth keeping.
Any situation, and your perception of it, is part of who you are. Identify specifically what it is you want to keep and what you'll leave behind. Be brutal. You may even miss some of the things you choose to leave behind - that's all part of the process. What you will find is renewed energy for new things that you want to include in your life - a great start to exiting your rat race and beginning on a new journey.
5. Create a map
When was the last time you thought about where you wanted to be in 5 or 10 years time? We get so caught up in "doing" things - for the business, for work, for others - things we think we should be doing, that we take no time to consider what we really want. Forget the race. Think journey.
Take the time to think about yourself, and where you would like to be. Nobody else's map will do here -it's time to do some hard thinking for yourself. What are the core values that you'd like to base your life around? What do you love to do or to be? What gives you a sense of purpose? What do you stand for? What could you not be dissuaded from believing in, no matter what? If you had one life to live this time round what would you do with it?
These are tough questions and their answers are part of the journey. Don't freak or feel guilty if you don't know the answers straight away. For the impatient and perfectionist people reading, this is not a test - there is no pass or fail. So don't treat it like one. The more you know about yourself, the more you will be able to start drawing your own map.
6. Head for the Life! (Not the Lifestyle)
Do you know what the difference is between having a life and maintaining a lifestyle?
A lifestyle is something we are told we need by society, advertisers, and parents. Life's luxuries, although nice to have, can be expensive financially and in the energy spent getting them. Perhaps the energy spent maintaining a lifestyle might be better used turning your life into an expression of who you are.
A lifestyle buys comfort. A life buys satisfaction and contentment. The best bed in the world only makes for a comfortable sleepless night if you lack contentment. If your lifestyle impedes you being who you are then dump it.
7. Go for your ideal
If it turns out that you drop out of your rat race and into your perfect life, would you even know it? Create a vision of where it would be, who you're with, what you're doing. Design it around your passions, beliefs, values and loves. Remember, just like spending your money, if you don't know what you want from your life there's plenty of people around who will be only too glad to tell you.
8. Look out for the rough bits
Choosing to live your life in your own way is tougher than staying in your rat race. People you know may be understanding or incredulous, and won't hesitate to give you their opinion. Temptations will abound to take a few laps round the old racecourse when the going gets tough. Our old comfort zones are traps waiting to lure us back into our old ways.
By being aware of this and planning for how you'll cope you will get through. Anything different can be scary. But it can also be fun too!
9. Enjoy the trip!
You've recognised where you don't want to be any longer and identified where you do. Now live where you are. Learn from the past and move on. Plan for the future but live in the present. You can't do anything about yesterday, so stop worrying about it. If you spend every minute think about tomorrow then you'll never enjoy today. And that's where all the action is!
10. Go for it
No more excuses. Nothing more to say. Just do it.
Sometimes the only way to "win" a race - where there can be no winner - is to just stop running.
Megan Tough - published writer, coach, facilitator and speaker - works with people to create outstandingly satisfying and truly successful professional lives. Make more money - have more fun! To learn more and to sign up for more FREE tips and articles like these, visit http://www.megantough.com
"Courage is being scared to death - but saddling up anyway." - John Wayne"Courage is the cliché hallmark attributed to the hero.
Want Real Change in Your Life? Take Action!
It's easy to begin a year with analysis: months, days and even years of "thinking." Many of us would like to believe that "reaching goals" begins with an armchair, a self-help book and a beer.
Motivation and Success: Improved Techniques
Changing our internal programming that limits us has never been simpler or easier; we just expect it to be more complex! When we associate images or objects that provide a state of relaxation and joy we create a receptive environment for the unconscious mind to accept powerful motivation and successful results.Founding Father of Autosuggestion:In the late 19th and early 20th century Emile Coue (a chemist who became a hypnotist) experimented with autosuggestion techniques with great results.
Violating Boundaries: Assert Yourself and Take Charge
"They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety." - Benjamin FranklinAre you sick and tired of being treated like a doormat and having people walk all over you? If you answered yes, read on.
The Untold Truth About Mentors, and Why You DONT Need One
I think there is a misconception about what a mentor truly is. A mentor is someone who guides you, someone wise, someone you trust.
If we want to fill our heads with the doom and gloom society seems to thrive on, all we need to do is turn on the local news at night. To make that quantum leap toward personal happiness and success in life, sometimes we just need to do what so many people seem to be talking about lately: "clean house" and take personal inventory of the people we associate with most.
It Is Up To You
One of the first things successful people realize is the old adage, "if it is to be, it is up to me." That is, for you, the fact that your success and your course is up to you.
Resolution Revolution: 3 Tips For Creating Real Change in the New Year
'Tis the season once again for parties, champagne, noisemakers..
Who are they to say it cant be done?
Doesn't it just burn you up when you have just shared your 'great idea' with someone and not only are they not as enthusiastic as you, they even go as far as to say your idea won't work! Trust me if this has happened to you you're not alone.In such instances we generally have two choices.
The Dawn On The Nile Valley Has Secrets To Tell! (3)
Me and Mao Tse-Tung!My first political experience was with Mao Tse-Tung 1968-69.That was exactly before the second Sudanese military dictator Ga'far Numeri took over power through his coup d'etat in May 25, 1969.
Motivation: 7 More Musings on Motivation
1. "If you have faith the size of a mustard seed, you can say to that mountain, move from here to there, and it shall be done.
Why Do Flowers Inspire Me So Much?
I grew up in a very cold climate where winter seemed go on for 6 months and ice, snow and barren trees is what you saw on a daily basis. Plus the bone chilling cold and cloudy skies all made for a long dreary winter.
How to Talk to Yourself When Nobody is Listening and You Want to
Do you ever pay attention to the thoughts inside your mind? And more importantly do you ever notice the way in which you talk to yourself?We all pay a lot of attention to the way we communicate with the outside world but we often neglect to improve the way we communicate with ourselves.When it comes to motivating yourself to be a better person, to do better at work or to create a happier family life you need to understand the importance of taking control of your self talk.
Get Started! Do Something!
This is about getting started. Taking that first step.
ABCs for High Achievers
A im for what you want by focusing clearly on priorities.B elieve in yourself and your goals, and then begin to strive for them.
Breaking Even: When is Enough, Enough?
I had the most interesting discussion today with a friend of mine. He and I were chatting about the economy, his job, families, and life in general.
What Is Failing Forward?
What an absurd statement! Absurd or not, progress is not possible without failure. It is part of being an evolving and growing human being.
Procrastinator No More!
Procrastination is when ever we postpone a task or duty intentionally without a valuable explanation. It is a natural tendency in people.
What Do You Truly Value Most?
Believe it or not, values are in the core of all of us. Theseunderrated rankings tell more about us than we could everimagine.
Need Help? Look Within First
After eating a turkey and dressing sandwich for breakfast, I am raring to go! For those of you who wrote and asked where the article was last week, I appreciate the fact that you look for it! I apologize for missing it, and to make up for it I have posted on my website a web log and pictures of the barn raising party we had last week. Look for the link on the front page of www.
Section Site Map - Submit News - Feedback - Comments - Advertise with Us
Copyright © 2006 Luminati Inc. All rights reserved.