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Motivation: No Finish LInes


There is a saying that goes something like "getting to the top is easy, the hard thing is staying there once you get there."

There's a reason the above statement is so true. It has to do with this interesting little quirk we humans have: our belief in finish lines. Deep with in our brains we have this belief that once we arrive, we can relax.

Now there are times in life when there are finish lines: 10K races and marathons, dog and horse racing tracks, and at Nascar races.

The problem is we apply this thinking to so many areas where there really are no finish lines: getting in shape, dieting, growing in your profession and especially marriage and other relationships.

Now in no way am I saying that we can't enjoy our achievements and pause to smell the roses. It's just that it's so tempting to stop and only smell the roses and not much else. I once supervised an intern who then took a job in the program. The ffirst thing they said after they got the job and then graduated with their degree was "I"ve been reading so much in school that i'm not going to read anything for a year."

Wrong answer.

When we imagine finish lines where there are none, we fall prey to something I call arrival syndrome.

Signs of Arrival Syndrome

The belief that you have "arrived" (with accompanying trumpets).

Coasting

You stop doing the things that got you where you are.

You do significantly less of the things that got you where you are.

Slipping backwards, losing the ground you have gained.

Other people noticing that you are slipping back but you deny it.

How to Avoid Arrival Syndrome

Discard the belief in finish lines

Pause to njoy your successes, just don't stop there.

Learn CPR. That stands for consistent, persistent and resistant. Consistant in the actions you take, persistent in your efforts to continue to grow, and resistant to the notion of resting on your laurels.

No matter how good things get, always remember to ask the queston: "how can we make this even better?"

Take notice of the mile posts of success along the way. This builds momentum and keeps you going.

This one is so simple and obvious, yet so many times we don't do it: keep doing the things that got you where you are. ANd if you really want to be different, do even more of the things that got you there.

It's often difficult to balance the enjoyment of all we have achieved with the commitment to continuing to learn and grow. Here's one tip that can be helpful: unless you see a white line painted on the ground in front of you, there are no finish lines.

Visit SecretsofGreatRelationships.com for tips and tools for creating and growing a great relationship. You can also subscribe to our f*r*e*e 10 day e-program on how to enrich your relationship today, from relationship coach and expert Jeff Herring.


MORE RESOURCES:

New York Times

Gabriele Oettingen Turns Her Mind to Motivation in 'Rethinking Positive Thinking'
New York Times
In her smart, lucid book, “Rethinking Positive Thinking: Inside the New Science of Motivation,” Dr. Oettingen critically re-examines positive thinking and give readers a more nuanced — and useful — understanding of motivation based on solid empirical ...



PsychCentral.com (blog)

Tips for Finding Motivation When You're Depressed
PsychCentral.com (blog)
Telling a depressed person to get motivated is like telling a rock to dance. You'll get the same result. It's not because depressed people don't want to get motivated. It's because getting motivated is an overwhelming task when you're depressed. Is ...



ESPN (blog)

Disappointing Sooners have plenty of motivation
ESPN (blog)
Disappointment reins during the holiday season with motivation for a meaningless bowl game among one of the many questions for Bob Stoops' team. Yet coaches and players alike insist motivation won't be a question, particularly against a Clemson squad ...

and more »


Jay Gruden: Facing Cowboys should provide plenty of motivation for Redskins
Washington Post (blog)
Although they found themselves in a far different situation from their opponents on Saturday, the Washington Redskins summoned plenty of motivation and pulled off a 27-24 upset. The Redskins went toe-to-toe with the Eagles, although their season has ...

and more »


KARE

Motivation Monday: No excuses travel workout
KARE
Motivation Monday: No excuses travel workout. Heading out of town for the holidays with no nearby gym? We know Christmas week is a hard week to fit in exercise, but it's not impossible. Loading… Post to Facebook. Motivation Monday: No excuses travel ...

and more »


Motivation key factor in bowl games
ABC News
With the first five games, though, set for Saturday -- it starts at 11 a.m. ET on ESPN as Nevada and Louisiana-Lafayette meet in the R+L Carriers New Orleans Bowl -- you'll struggle to find a coach or player willing to admit that motivation is a concern.

and more »


blogs.hbr.org (blog)

What Maslow's Hierarchy Won't Tell You About Motivation
blogs.hbr.org (blog)
At some point in their careers, most leaders have either consciously — or, more likely, unwittingly — based (or justified) their approach to motivation on Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs. Maslow's idea that people are motivated by satisfying lower-level ...



Express.co.uk

Happy Mondays: It's not inspiration you're lacking but motivation
Express.co.uk
It's not that you can't find anything – hard skin removers, microwavable hot water bottles, novelty slippers guaranteed to go to the charity shop the day after Boxing Day. No, it's not inspiration you're lacking but motivation. Or more specifically the ...



Javier: Our Europa League motivation
Liverpool FC
The carrot of Champions League qualification for winning the Europa League will further supplement the motivation within the Liverpool squad to lift the trophy next year, insists Javier Manquillo. A third-place finish in Group B of the continent's ...



Astana Times

Professionalism, Motivation Behind Finland's Success as Peacemaker, Ahtisaari ...
Astana Times
HELSINKI – As Finland celebrated the Day of the Peacemaker last month, The Astana Times interviewed former President and Nobel Peace Prize laureate Martti Ahtisaari to talk about his country's experience and his views on the role of the United Nations ...


Google News


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