Bookmark Website  | Free Registration  | The Team
The Lounge  | Champions  | The Wire |  Schedule |  Audio  |  Arcade  |  The Top Ten  |  Historical  |  Email  |  Video

Finding Yourself: Finding Passion Series - 1 of 3


We have been told that the things we don't like in our children are the same things we don't like in ourselves. We are told that we project our own flaws and issues onto our perceived enemies in an attempt to work them out within ourselves. We stereotype people according to who they hang out with. Birds of a feather flock together. We're attracted to people like ourselves, with the same flaws.

To carry the concept further, those traits and attributes that we admire in our heroes are within us. Just as with our flaws, we are simply projecting our virtues onto others in an attempt to work them out within ourselves. We are attracted to certain people because they reflect our own aspects back at us. What's that mean?

Let's start with an exercise. Without regards to a persons looks or what they do for a living, think about the people that you've admired in your life. On a piece of paper, write down a list of people that have inspired you. Who has touched your heart? Who were your heroes? Make it as long or as short as you like. Which teachers, athletes, movie characters, and politicians have motivated you? Who makes your heart feel warm and enthusiastic?

When you've finished writing down your list of heroes, shift gears and think about the traits they have that you admire so much. Are they compassionate, steadfast, loyal, happy, determined, or laidback? Go through each person on your list one at a time and spend some time thinking about their virtues. What makes them so special that you put them on your list of heroes? As you reflect on these people and their attributes, list the various traits on a separate piece of paper. Place check marks beside those that get more than one 'vote.'

My lists looked like this:


Mother


Daughter


Son


Victoria (minister)


Jennifer (best friend)


Jon (doctor friend)


Mother Teresa


Princess Diana


Daniel (musician friend)


Simone (artist friend)


Vivian Leigh


Ron (director friend)


Albert Einstein

No worries about money ////////


Giving //////////


Kindness //////////


Loyal ///////


Joyful attitude //////


Self-confidence ///////


Intelligence //////////


Sense of humor ///////


Follows dreams /////////


Believes in "the Force" ///////////


Not a quitter //////////

After you've written your two lists, sit with them for a while and reflect on the possibility that those traits on your list might actually be present inside you. The reason you love them so much in others is because it's a piece of yourself that you're connecting to. If you were living up to your full potential, wouldn't you be a lot more like the people you admire? Is it hard to believe that the things on your list could possibly be the greatness in yourself? Ask some caring relatives or friends to look over your list and see if it matches their image of you. I think you'll be surprised.

When I did this exercise back in 1998, I had my children do it too. We sat around the kitchen table and did it together as a family activity. My daughter was eight years old at the time and found that she is "giggly, nice, giving, kind, a great friend, smart, funny, and loving." She already knew that, but enjoyed the confirmation. My son suffered a lot of emotional insecurities at the time because he'd been misdiagnosed as having Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. He was shocked to find that he is "nice follows dreams, strong, giving, active, fast, smart, playful, loving, funny, believes in 'the Force,' laughfull, fun, and brave." I had been telling him for years that he possessed those qualities but he thought I was prejudice because I'm his mom. He began making a huge turn around in his emotional well-being by acknowledging these wonderful traits within himself. I found the strength to start my own business and to finally pursue a career as a motivational speaker and writer.

At the time, it was pretty easy to tell myself that I am giving, kind, loyal, intelligent, and believe in 'the Force.' On the other hand, I really struggled with the concepts that I had no worries about money, a joyful attitude, self-confidence, and a sense of humor. I wanted desperately to be like that, but I didn't think I really followed dreams and I wasn't too sure that I wasn't a quitter after all. Over the years, I have learned many lessons and have experienced enough of the truth of this to know that yes I am exactly those things on that list. I have also learned that the things I most despised in others was indeed the things I wanted to work on in myself. The rule really does apply in both directions.

As I've been writing this article, I've been thinking about what it would be like to re-do the exercise now. Would my children's lists be different? Would mine? I think my children's lists would reflect a more adult perspective, but I think they'd still show most of the same traits. I might add some new names to my list, but I suspect that I would come up with a very similar list of traits. We might uncover more traits, but I doubt that we'd remove any. It's most likely that the traits follow us throughout our lives. It reminds me of that old saying, "wherever you go, there you are."

In finding our good traits, we uncover our true potential. We have something to live up to. We can measure our conduct and choices against the list. How much of our inner-struggle, like my son's, comes from not realizing our gifts? How much comes from realizing our potential and not living up to it? How much easier is life when we are behaving in accordance with our list of virtues? How much better do we feel about ourselves? How much better do others treat us when we live by these traits?

Copyright 2003, Skye Thomas, Tomorrow's Edge

About The Author

Skye Thomas began writing books and articles with an everyday practical approach to life in 1999 after twenty years of studying spirituality, metaphysics, astrology, personal growth, motivation, and parenting. After years of high heels and business clothes, she is currently enjoying working from home in her pajamas. Go to www.TomorrowsEdge.net to read more of her articles and to get a free preview of one of her books.

Skye@TomorrowsEdge.net


MORE RESOURCES:

Chron.com (blog)

Rockets find more motivation to win for Houston's flood victims
Chron.com (blog)
SAN FRANCISCO – With Houston hit hard by the storm and flooding since the Rockets' Game 4 win, Rockets center Dwight Howard said the Rockets are thinking of people back home, even calling it extra motivation heading to Game 5 to try to send the ...
Warriors, Rockets jolted and primed for complete Game 5ABC30.com
Rockets Players Receive Golden State Media Memo Presuming a Series SweepBleacher Report

all 1,684 news articles »


Business 2 Community

Entrepreneurship: 4 Signs You're Seeking Motivation the Wrong Way
Business 2 Community
Thinking. And a lot of the thinking depends on having the right dose of motivation. Do you find that you're unmotivated to take the big steps needed as an entrepreneur? If so chances are you're seeking motivation in the wrong way. How do you know when ...



Entertainment Tonight

Sofia Vergara Keeps a Joe Manganiello Cutout in Her Gym for 'Motivation'
Entertainment Tonight
The 42-year-old actress recently Instagrammed this hilarious shot of herself getting her exercise on with one very noticeable figure keeping watch -- a cutout of her super-buff fiance, Magic Mike XXL star Joe Manganiello, shirtless. "Who wouldn't get ...
Sofia Vergara's Workout Motivation is... a Cardboard Cutout of Fiancé Joe ...Closer Weekly

all 12 news articles »


The Globe and Mail (subscription)

Seven deadly mistakes that destroy employee motivation
The Globe and Mail (subscription)
This makes people feel powerless and unappreciated, stifling opportunities or a desire to offer innovative ideas and alternative suggestions to improve existing processes. A lack of flexibility on the leader's part can destroy team morale and motivation.



The Borneo Post

Najib questions Dr M's motivation over claims against him, govt
The Borneo Post
He said the question that should be asked was what was Dr Mahathir's motivation in choosing this moment to regurgitate smears manufactured by the very opposition groups that he previously denounced as liars. Najib pointed out that Dr Mahathir often ...
Najib questions Dr M's motivation over claims against him, governmentAstro Awani
Najib takes on Mahathir for malicious rumours and liesFree Malaysia Today

all 46 news articles »


SuperSport

Drotske slams lack of motivation
SuperSport
Toyota Cheetahs coach Naka Drotske has slammed his players for an apparent lack of motivation during their 40-17 Vodacom Super Rugby loss to the Emirates Lions on Saturday. Drotske said any suggestion the last few games of the Super Rugby ...
Cheetahs 'motivated by Naka's exit'Sport24

all 83 news articles »


BurlingtonFreePress.com

Finding right motivation, Enman races to second VCM win
BurlingtonFreePress.com
Motivation. Any runner, from elite to beginner, needs it, searches for it when a race challenges mind and body. Kasie Enman is no exception. And she needed some at Sunday's 27th annual People's United Bank Vermont City Marathon & Relay. A trailblazer ...

and more »


SkySports

Arsene Wenger: Arsenal motivation high for FA Cup final
SkySports
Arsene Wenger says Arsenal will not lack motivation for Saturday's FA Cup final even if the pressure to win a trophy is less than 12 months ago. Victory over Aston Villa at Wembley would give Wenger a sixth winners' medal - a post-war record - and mean ...
The Famous MailboxFootball365.com

all 409 news articles »


OregonLive.com

NCAA baseball tournament: On Selection Monday, Oregon State Beavers ...
OregonLive.com
Players will store away the perceived slight, remembering it only for added motivation this weekend. They recognize that any argument to host becomes moot once they touch down Wednesday in Dallas. The double-elimination regional is filled with daunting ...

and more »


CTV News

Crash survivors focus on finding motivation for recovery
CTV News
"(If ) you need to go to rehab to improve you're muscle function, the patient who is motivated will try and when it hurts, when it's difficult, will push themselves harder so they are likely to get better," said Dr. Perry Gray, an ICU physician and ...


Google News


Advertisement



Section Site Map - Submit News - Feedback - Comments - Advertise with Us

Copyright © 2006 Luminati Inc. All rights reserved.