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Bore Hard is one of the craftiest and cagiest operators in the game today, and was P4P No.1 until they found out he, er... wasn't any more. But here's some of his finest gameplans from the latter stage of his career. Thrill to the incomparable work of this ring legend:
The DLH Fight: Crafty old Bernard has got this one all sewn up... do absolutely **** all for eight rounds, then give a two foot Mexican a love tap and watch him take a dive. A leap to immortality!!!
Taylor: The sly fox just couldn't be bettered on this night... he took Taylor into the trenches by letting him win the first half of the fight by throwing three punches a round, then got the upperhand by nutting him in the face and turning it on late... too late. However, Hopkins is such a ring general that he knew when he had the decision go against him the first time, for the rematch he had to... do exactly the ****ing same again then piss off to Light Heavy.
Winky Wright: Probably his finest hour, Bore Hard takes on the P4P No.2 and ponders long and hard on how to neutralise his impentrable defence 16lbs above his ideal fighting weight. Clever old Bernard soon reasons it out using skills that would put Archie Moore to shame - he pulls Winky's arms down and nuts him in the face. Several times. Exceptional technique.
Howard Eastman: Run around and pot shot for a win? Nonsense, it's hit and not get hit... in fact, I had to rub me ****in' eyes just to check it wasn't Muhammad Ali himself in there.
Here's Bore Hard in action, the finest boxing mind of the 21st century:
The DLH Fight: Crafty old Bernard has got this one all sewn up... do absolutely **** all for eight rounds, then give a two foot Mexican a love tap and watch him take a dive. A leap to immortality!!!
Taylor: The sly fox just couldn't be bettered on this night... he took Taylor into the trenches by letting him win the first half of the fight by throwing three punches a round, then got the upperhand by nutting him in the face and turning it on late... too late. However, Hopkins is such a ring general that he knew when he had the decision go against him the first time, for the rematch he had to... do exactly the ****ing same again then piss off to Light Heavy.
Winky Wright: Probably his finest hour, Bore Hard takes on the P4P No.2 and ponders long and hard on how to neutralise his impentrable defence 16lbs above his ideal fighting weight. Clever old Bernard soon reasons it out using skills that would put Archie Moore to shame - he pulls Winky's arms down and nuts him in the face. Several times. Exceptional technique.
Howard Eastman: Run around and pot shot for a win? Nonsense, it's hit and not get hit... in fact, I had to rub me ****in' eyes just to check it wasn't Muhammad Ali himself in there.
Here's Bore Hard in action, the finest boxing mind of the 21st century:
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