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post a joke get a billion points

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  • #11
    What do urine samples and Canadian beer have in common?

    The taste

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    • #12
      Statistically... 9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape.

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      • #13

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        • #14
          Originally posted by chav View Post
          Statistically... 9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape.
          lmao!!


          One day an Englishman, an American, and a Canadian walked into a pub together. They proceeded to each buy a pint of Labatt Blue. Just as they were about to enjoy their beverages, three flies landed in each of their pints.

          The Englishman pushed his beer away from him in disgust. The American fished the offending fly out of his beer and continued drinking it as if nothing happened. The Canadian picked the fly out of his drink and started shaking it over the pint, yelling, "SPIT IT OUT, SPIT IT OUT, YOU BASTARD!!!"

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          • #15
            If your best friend farts and you never hear it........he may be gay

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            • #16
              A convicted pedophiliac murderer and a young boy are walking through the woods at night together. The young boy looks up at the man and says : "Gee mister, these woods are awful scary at night..." The man looks down at the young boy and says : "How do you think I feel? I'm walking back alone!"

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              • #17
                The only jokes I ever remember are the really bad taste ones that will probably get the ban hammer on my arse. Im terrible at remembering most jokes, but if it's bad taste and likely to offend, my memory seems to work better for some reason

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                • #18
                  Kelly Pavlik walks into a bar...

                  You can make your own punchline up for that one.

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                  • #19
                    A guy is driving along a desolate stretch of mountainous road. He comes upon a break in the guard rail and notices a thick cloud of smoke ascending from the hillside beneath. Concerned, he pulls over to the side of the road, and gets out to investigate.

                    He finds a badly mangled car and sees a man in the drivers seat, a woman in the passenger's seat, and a little boy with a small puppy in his lap in the rear seat - All dead. Shocked, he heads back to his car to phone the police but stops in his tracks when he hears a whimper coming from the wreckage.

                    He rushes over to a nearby bush and discovers an 8 year old girl - Alive and breathing.

                    He kneels down to the sobbing girl and says, "Little girl, is that your car that crashed?"

                    "Yes."

                    "And are those your parents dead in the front seats?"

                    "Yes."

                    "And is that your brother dead in the back seat?"

                    "Yes."

                    "And is that your puppy dead in his lap?"

                    "Yes."

                    The man considers these answers, stands up, surveys the area for any onlookers, unzips his pants and says : "Well little girl, today just isn't your lucky day...."

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                    • #20
                      Originally posted by The_Bringer View Post
                      A guy is driving along a desolate stretch of mountainous road. He comes upon a break in the guard rail and notices a thick cloud of smoke ascending from the hillside beneath. Concerned, he pulls over to the side of the road, and gets out to investigate.

                      He finds a badly mangled car and sees a man in the drivers seat, a woman in the passenger's seat, and a little boy with a small puppy in his lap in the rear seat - All dead. Shocked, he heads back to his car to phone the police but stops in his tracks when he hears a whimper coming from the wreckage.

                      He rushes over to a nearby bush and discovers an 8 year old girl - Alive and breathing.

                      He kneels down to the sobbing girl and says, "Little girl, is that your car that crashed?"

                      "Yes."

                      "And are those your parents dead in the front seats?"

                      "Yes."

                      "And is that your brother dead in the back seat?"

                      "Yes."

                      "And is that your puppy dead in his lap?"

                      "Yes."

                      The man considers these answers, stands up, surveys the area for any onlookers, unzips his pants and says : "Well little girl, today just isn't your lucky day...."

                      ^^^ LMAO

                      Reading that has given me a little false confidence that maybe there is others here with that enjoy jokes that are just wrong on so many levels..




                      My daughter and I share very different views when it comes to sex.

                      I see the back of her head, she sees the mattress.

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