Looking at buying a house in the US...
... I was doing a search, and went to look at one today. I was seeking out what I thought were good areas, so I went for a house in Erie.
Well, I got there, and fuck me. First of all, there was a massive hole in the side of it, with a flood going all the way through it. It was like this shithole had its own internal moat or something. I dunno what happened, but it was clear to me the guy was a complete fucking asshole or something.
Then when I walked around it, I couldn't believe my eyes. Butt plugs, anal lube, gay sex toys, the lot. It was a right homo fest. I went through the living room and you have never seen such a total shithole in all your life, I kid you not... the entire room was covered in UFO and Roy Jones magazines, all of them stuck together with fresh sperm. I asked the guy how much he wanted for it, but when I turned round he was chugging on a cock.
He was a complete fucking cunt if you ask me.