I'm off to bed lads. Goodnight my lovers.

Shag yer later :luvbed:

Edwin Valero KO 3 Jerson Ravelo.

i know you dont mean that:luvbed:

I'm off to bed lads. Goodnight my lovers.

Shag yer later :luvbed:


sleep tight babes :luvbed:

Licking ***** is a lot like dealing with the Mafia. A slip of the tongue and your in deep ****.


still the funniest thing i have seen all day, as sad as that is

i showed that to HEather and she said ewwwwwwww

Licking ***** is a lot like dealing with the Mafia. A slip of the tongue and your in deep ****.


still the funniest thing i have seen all day, as sad as that is


yeah tis good. It was my special phrase last year.

yes yes.................. what a boring ass friday night this has been for me, how was yours?

yes yes.................. what a boring ass friday night this has been for me, how was yours?


been very good it has boston. I am meeting my heather tomorrow and I have one thing in mind :luvbed:

been very good it has boston. I am meeting my heather tomorrow and I have one thing in mind :luvbed:

good luck man, and remember, you dont score until you score. i got that from American Pie, dont know if you have seen it

good luck man, and remember, you dont score until you score. i got that from American Pie, dont know if you have seen it

Stiffler is one of my favourite all time characters (after Fonzie of course)

I prefer the phrase - Every hole's a goal.

Stiffler is one of my favourite all time characters (after Fonzie of course)

I prefer the phrase - Every hole's a goal.

yeah i agree with that, American pie 2 is the best if them all

i must find more quotes

[talking about masturbation]
Jim's Dad: It's like playing a tennis ball against a brick wall, which can be fun. It can be fun, but it's not a game.
Jim: Right.
Jim's Dad: It's not a game.
Jim: No.
Jim's Dad: What you want is a partner to return the ball.

yeah i agree with that, American pie 2 is the best if them all

i must find more quotes


yeah ain't american pie 2 the one where they go to the beach house? ****in funny when they break into that lesbian couples house and stiffler goes all hyper when he finds the dildo.

[talking about masturbation]
Jim's Dad: It's like playing a tennis ball against a brick wall, which can be fun. It can be fun, but it's not a game.
Jim: Right.
Jim's Dad: It's not a game.
Jim: No.
Jim's Dad: What you want is a partner to return the ball.

yes the dad always ****in cracks me up.

"Lets talk about masturbation" lol

yeah ain't american pie 2 the one where they go to the beach house? ****in funny when they break into that lesbian couples house and stiffler goes all hyper when he finds the dildo.

hell yeah thats the one, i got time to watch that one before i have to talk to Heather at midnight, SUCK ME BEAUTIFUL!

yes the dad always ****in cracks me up.

"Lets talk about masturbation" lol

thats crazy, i wish i had a dad like that though, one that actaully gave a ****

thats crazy, i wish i had a dad like that though, one that actaully gave a ****


believe me you don't want a dad like that. my dad was a bit like that with me in my early teens and it embarassed the **** outta me.

believe me you don't want a dad like that. my dad was a bit like that with me in my early teens and it embarassed the **** outta me.

well thats not what i meant, lol, Jims dad seemed nice and everything. he was a loving father, not an alchoholic basterd who hit his wife and kids

well thats not what i meant, lol, Jims dad seemed nice and everything. he was a loving father, not an alchoholic basterd who hit his wife and kids

oh i see what you mean dude.

although it is pretty good having a dad who hands you a condom every time you go out at night. I think so anyway...

oh i see what you mean dude.

although it is pretty good having a dad who hands you a condom every time you go out at night. I think so anyway...

oh he still gave me condoms whenever i wanted them, lol. but thats was back when i still saw and talked to him, i havent seen him in 3 months, i have spent about a total of 45 minutes around him in the past 8 months

i also think he is a bit racist, he treats my Black cousins very bad. what an ******* my father is

Jim's Dad: You may be Jimbo, or Jumbo, or Jimbodini to those guys in there, but there are still two people who haven't forgotten where James Emmanuel Levenstein came from. We're awful proud of you son.
Jim: Thanks, Dad.
Jim's Dad: Don't forget your penis cream.

i also think he is a bit racist, he treats my Black cousins very bad. what an ******* my father is

sounds like he needs knocking on his ass to be honest.

sounds like he needs knocking on his ass to be honest.

i will be the one to do that, last time i spent any real time with him he had about 35 beers in him and started saying **** and took a swing at me, he is about 6-1, 215, so this was not exactly fair. he threw me down a few times but never really connected with a punch, otherwise i would have had his dumbass thrown in jail. i will get him one of these days:boxing:

i will be the one to do that, last time i spent any real time with him he had about 35 beers in him and started saying **** and took a swing at me, he is about 6-1, 215, so this was not exactly fair. he threw me down a few times but never really connected with a punch, otherwise i would have had his dumbass thrown in jail. i will get him one of these days:boxing:


shame i wasn't there to back you up :boxing:

although i could have done with your help a few weeks ago with some ****in lanky goth who's out of the picture now ;)

you know i would have helped you out with that tall goth ****er, but you will get your prize anyhow

Hello, my pretties. :luvbed:

Hello, my pretties. :luvbed:

i'm off to bed now babes me drinks are finished :puppy_dog

you know i would have helped you out with that tall goth ****er, but you will get your prize anyhow


i know. tomorrow night I shall be #1 again! I'm just pissed i never got to give the goth a good slappin.

i'm off to bed now babes me drinks are finished :puppy_dog

Don't leave me!

Don't leave me!


I have a half bottle of stale milk in the fridge. I'll give that a whirl and keep you company while i look at some scarlett pics :)

I have a half bottle of stale milk in the fridge. I'll give that a whirl and keep you company while i look at some scarlett pics :)

I knew i could count on you. :luvbed:

I knew i could count on you. :luvbed:

well she is a beauty is she not? With scarlett in mind sleep is the last thing I plan on doing. :luvbed:

well she is a beauty is she not? With scarlett in mind sleep is the last thing I plan on doing. :luvbed:

Southpaw.... you complete me.

:luvbed:

Southpaw.... you complete me.

:luvbed:


laddie, no more foreplay. lets get down to business :luvbed:

laddie, no more foreplay. lets get down to business :luvbed:

I await your man-meat.

I await your man-meat.

you need wait no more laddie :luvbed:

you need wait no more laddie :luvbed:

Mmmmmmmmm! - it tastes good, babes. :luvbed:

Mmmmmmmmm! - it tastes good, babes. :luvbed:

the milk gives it that extra kick. And that was bastard fantastic babes, you've worn me out with your powerful thighs and your electric tongue. I must sleep now babes, we can pick up where we left off tomorrow. ciao :luvbed:

the milk gives it that extra kick. And that was bastard fantastic babes, you've worn me out with your powerful thighs and your electric tongue. I must sleep now babes, we can pick up where we left off tomorrow. ciao :luvbed:

Sweet dreams, babes. :luvbed:

Where are you..... you sexy ***** ?

i am here ............

i am here ............

Let's make love.

if you insist, i am still kinda sore from last night though, dont be so rough

if you insist, i am still kinda sore from last night though, dont be so rough

For you, babes:

:luvbed: :luvbed: :luvbed:

man i am bored, Heather isnt saying anything right now, she is frustrating

man i am bored, Heather isnt saying anything right now, she is frustrating

tell her the ***** licking line again, that'll give her a chuckle.

man i am bored, Heather isnt saying anything right now, she is frustrating

How do you mean? Is she ignoring you out of spite?

DYE if you say one more thing about heather I'm gonne come over to kansas and you'll get a size 11 up your arse

damn last night, or this morning turned out good, i couldent be happier right now, and no Kaynan(notpiggu) she was not ignoring me at all. we talked until 7 am. all about good stuff, she is the sweetest girl i have ever known, and i really do love her

good day, gents.

hot fuzz?...

good day, gents.

good day my lover

good day my lover

I'm feeling a little rough around the edges, babe and need some comforting.

I'm feeling a little rough around the edges, babe and need some comforting.

there there babes, southpaw makes it all better. get comfortable in your chair and think of hoffs legs and scarletts fantastic chest area.

there there babes, southpaw makes it all better. get comfortable in your chair and think of hoffs legs and scarletts fantastic chest area.

I feel like a million bucks now.

I feel like a million bucks now.


laddie, may i spend you? :hitit:

laddie, may i spend you? :hitit:

Spend away.

Afternoon lads.

Afternoon lads.

How are you today, Hoff ?

How are you today, Hoff ?

Very well thankyou my darling...but i just got back from the cinema and the film i saw confused the **** out of me. Premonition with sandra bollocks, you seen it laddie? Tbh i'm still baffled by it. I might ask Addison to explain it to me, I bet he's seen it. The cunt probably had a minor part in it for all we know.

Very well thankyou my darling...but i just got back from the cinema and the film i saw confused the **** out of me. Premonition with sandra bollocks, you seen it laddie? Tbh i'm still baffled by it. I might ask Addison to explain it to me, I bet he's seen it. The cunt probably had a minor part in it for all we know.

I haven't seen it. Is it any good ? marks out of ten ?

I haven't seen it. Is it any good ? marks out of ten ?

T'was a bit ****. I was dissapointed. Sandra Bollocks makes it watchable but it just confused the **** out of me and left me feeling mighty bastard unsatisfied.

Why did Anorak get banned laddie?

T'was a bit ****. I was dissapointed. Sandra Bollocks makes it watchable but it just confused the **** out of me and left me feeling mighty bastard unsatisfied.

Why did Anorak get banned laddie?

For Apparent flaming. Its okay for all the little dip****s to flame him all day but once he fights back, it's an instant banning.

Annie is a top 5 all time poster and a damn sexy bum boy to boot.

For Apparent flaming. Its okay for all the little dip****s to flame him all day but once he fights back, it's an instant banning.

Annie is a top 5 all time poster and a damn sexy bum boy to boot.

That he is. Did he say something particularly insulting to warrant this banning or do you think that it's just another injustice committed by bigpoppa on a roid rage?

Annie does flame too much though. He should just ignore the cunts.

That he is. Did he say something particularly insulting to warrant this banning or do you think that it's just another injustice committed by bigpoppa on a roid rage?

Annie does flame too much though. He should just ignore the cunts.

He did say some rather derogatory remarks about Pinoys but it was all satirical because of the double standards of this place - It's okay to call someone a Brit f.ag but if you say anything remotely racist to a black person or a pinoy then it's an instant banning.

He did say some rather derogatory remarks about Pinoys but it was all satirical because of the double standards of this place - It's okay to call someone a Brit f.ag but if you say anything remotely racist to a black person or a pinoy then it's an instant banning.

Bigpoppa is king of the double standards. If Sonny and Anorak get banned then Manny P, Ako pa ha and a bunch of other pinoys should be as well for the things they come out with.

He'll be back soon though darling. Dont worry.

Bigpoppa is king of the double standards. If Sonny and Anorak get banned then Manny P, Ako pa ha and a bunch of other pinoys should be as well for the things they come out with.

He'll be back soon though darling. Dont worry.

Lets hope so.

Hoff, are you surprised to know that a number of people have thought it was me in my avatar ?

Lets hope so.

Hoff, are you surprised to know that a number of people have thought it was me in my avatar ?

If it was yanks that thought you were Frank then I aint really suprised.

Were they yanks laddie?

If it was yanks that thought you were Frank then I aint really suprised.

Were they yanks laddie?

A few but a number of Brits have thought the same, mainly Medium-Deek.

Ps: Look at the beautiful love poem i left on his profile page:

http://www.boxingscene.com/forums/member.php?u=24348

A few but a number of Brits have thought the same, mainly Medium-Deek.

Ps: Look at the beautiful love poem i left on his profile page:

http://www.boxingscene.com/forums/member.php?u=24348

****in 'ell laddie. There are limey bum boys out there who dont know of the glorious Frank Gallagher. The sinful cunts eh! They need to pull their bastard finger out, every limey should know and revere Frank.

...beautiful poem laddie. Our Oscar would be proud of yer.

****in 'ell laddie. There are limey bum boys out there who dont know of the glorious Frank Gallagher. The sinful cunts eh! They need to pull their bastard finger out, every limey should know and revere Frank.

...beautiful poem laddie. Our Oscar would be proud of yer.

It was for Deeksy but you were my inspiration.

It was for Deeksy but you were my inspiration.

Am I your muse?

Am I your muse?

You certainly are.

You certainly are.

You are like a lighthouse to me. In these choppy e-seas there are many dangers; pirates disguised as pinoys determined to take you down, jagged rocks ready to sink any thread you post and fat yanks posing as sharks ready to eat yer. They are all scattered about and when I need to find a path through the crashing waves I look to you laddie, and your light and energy see's me through the hard times so it does.


:luvbed: :luvbed: :luvbed:

You are like a lighthouse to me. In these choppy e-seas there are many dangers; pirates disguised as pinoys determined to take you down, jagged rocks ready to sink any thread you post and fat yanks posing as sharks ready to eat yer. They are all scattered about and when I need to find a path through the crashing waves I look to you laddie, and your light and energy see's me through the hard times so it does.


:luvbed: :luvbed: :luvbed:

I'll guide you through the most treacherous e-seas, my darling.

I'll guide you through the most treacherous e-seas, my darling.

Do you think southpaw will do a stint up in the crows nest to watch out for the pirates and sharks?

Do you think southpaw will do a stint up in the crows nest to watch out for the pirates and sharks?

He's a big fella so he would be perfect for the job. The only problem would be him getting put off by my arse cleavage as i scrub the cum stains off the deck.

He's a big fella so he would be perfect for the job. The only problem would be him getting put off by my arse cleavage as i scrub the cum stains off the deck.

We'll have to abide by what the allah fella says then and get you wearing the burqa then. It's either that or get embroiled in a lusty bum love session while we're supposed to be looking out for pirate pinoys and fat yank sharks.

Maybe we should ignore the allah fella just this once...

Maybe we should ignore the allah fella just this once...
What? You sinful beastly devil! Ignore allah and I shall spit in your face and call down fiery vengeance upon your lusty soul.

Lets have a shag first though :o

We'll have to abide by what the allah fella says then and get you wearing the burqa then. It's either that or get embroiled in a lusty bum love session while we're supposed to be looking out for pirate pinoys and fat yank sharks.

Maybe we should ignore the allah fella just this once...

I'm sure he'll understand.

What? You sinful beastly devil! Ignore allah and I shall spit in your face and call down fiery vengeance upon your lusty soul.

Lets have a shag first though :o
Come here saddam you randy ghost :3some:

I'm sure he'll understand.

I do hope so. Saddam seems to be quite upset though. Once we've given him an earth shattering orgasm he'll soon forget though.

Come here saddam you randy ghost :3some:



I do hope so. Saddam seems to be quite upset though. Once we've given him an earth shattering orgasm he'll soon forget though.

Lets get on the job straight away.

Lets get on the job straight away.

Saddam is lucky that we are both here to him a seeing to. He gets twice the pleasure today so he does.

Saddam is lucky that we are both here to him a seeing to. He gets twice the pleasure today so he does.

It seems that death has been good to Saddam.

It seems that death has been good to Saddam.

the weekend has been good to me laddie. a few more cans and i'll be happy for the week.

the weekend has been good to me laddie. a few more cans and i'll be happy for the week.

It's been bad to me. It's left me penniless and nursing a hangover.

It's been bad to me. It's left me penniless and nursing a hangover.

oh dear laddie, you still haven't gotten the hang of getting kids to pay for your drinks have ya?

oh dear laddie, you still haven't gotten the hang of getting kids to pay for your drinks have ya?

I'm afraid i have not. I'm new to this game and it may take me a while.

I'm afraid i have not. I'm new to this game and it may take me a while.


You shall learn from the master laddie. Do you have a leather jacket? If not you should bloody get one as no leecher can get a pint without one. After that you need to start picking fights with people weaker than you, preferably men aged older than 70 although 65 is acceptable, mainly as it is pointless to get hurt as you look for a pint.

You shall learn from the master laddie. Do you have a leather jacket? If not you should bloody get one as no leecher can get a pint without one. After that you need to star picking fights with people weaker than you, preferably men aged older than 70 although 65 is acceptable, mainly as it is pointless to get hurt as you look for a pint.

Impressive. I am eager to learn more and will be a willing student, master Southpaw.

Impressive. I am eager to learn more and will be a willing student, master Southpaw.


good man laddie, you know it makes sense. It all starts with the jacket and then your mind shall follow your actions.

Oasis you gunna morrissey this tour

Oasis you gunna morrissey this tour

I'm afraid i shall not. I will need you there to comfort me though,

good man laddie, you know it makes sense. It all starts with the jacket and then your mind shall follow your actions.

I'm not sure if i could pull off the leather look but i will do anything for a pint.

I'm afraid i shall not. I will need you there to comfort me though,

did you see our harry yesterday laddie?

and you would look ****in great in leather laddie. a hard scotsman was born into leather and a pint glass.

did you see our harry yesterday laddie?

and you would look ****in great in leather laddie. a hard scotsman was born into leather and a pint glass.

No. I was too pissed to even work a tv set.

i wish i had an English accent

i wish i had an English accent

Why ??? they are ****ing ugly accents.. and considering they are the Inventors of the language ..they butcher it..
Now Irish and Scottish.. these are nice on the ears..

i wish i had an English accent

there are many different english accents dye. the north and south producers many a different ways of speaking. talk with a french one if you want female attention.

I wish I had english teeth

Why ??? they are ****ing ugly accents.. and considering they are the Inventors of the language ..they butcher it..
Now Irish and Scottish.. these are nice on the ears..

no, my grandad was Irish and I never knew what he was ****ing saying.

I wish I had english teeth

Indeed with NHS dentists teeth care is fantastic.

I wish I had english teeth

Steal a Scotsman's penny and you will soon have no teeth.

manchester ,liverpool....speak much better then ****ney ****ers

manchester ,liverpool....speak much better then ****ney ****ers

thankyou. we manchester folk have no distinct accent though it is rough and plain. A few months in scotland will sort me out.

Yorkshire accents make me want to puke...
irish.. who cares if you can understand them..??? It still sounds nice..
Some hot ginger freckeld Irish bird asking for a ****... MAN you cant beat that..:no:

whats a scouser

whats a scouser


someone from liverpool.

whats a tosser? i heard someone say that octoberfest is for tossers and sheepshaggers??

whats a tosser? i heard someone say that octoberfest is for tossers and sheepshaggers??

A tosser is a similar insult as to calling someone a wanker and a sheepshagger is a welshman.


your meant to be a limey now dye so knowing all this is compulsery.

Where has our leader gone today ? i'm craving a strong cup of hoffee.

Where has our leader gone today ? i'm craving a strong cup of hoffee.


i must admit a creamy cup of Hoffee would go down a treat now so it would. He is probably busy satisfying some of his many lovers.

i must admit a creamy cup of Hoffee would go down a treat now so it would. He is probably busy satisfying some of his many lovers.

His special blend is quite potent.

Southpaw, to help you cope with Hoffee withdrawl:

http://i54.photobucket.com/albums/g92/mario_world/Scarlett_Johansson1.jpg

Southpaw, to help you cope with Hoffee withdrawl:

http://i54.photobucket.com/albums/g92/mario_world/Scarlett_Johansson1.jpg

laddie you know my achilles heel don't you? It's below my waist and above my knee.

laddie you know my achilles heel don't you? It's below my waist and above my knee.

I am familiar with it.

I am familiar with it.


returning the favour

http://www.hecklerspray.com/imppix/photos/uncategorized/wax_on_wax_hoff.jpg

how many of you guys shave your armpits and the rest of that unwanted hair? i admit that i do. i shave everything but my legs

returning the favour

http://www.hecklerspray.com/imppix/photos/uncategorized/wax_on_wax_hoff.jpg

You seem to be on first name terms with my Achilles heel as well. :luvbed:

how many of you guys shave your armpits and the rest of that unwanted hair? i admit that i do. i shave everything but my legs

:nonono: Dyna, no self-respecting male shaves their armpit hair. Drink 5 bloody marys and beg for forgiveness.

nope, Heather is ok with it, i think she kinda likes it

You seem to be on first name terms with my Achilles heel as well. :luvbed:


he has the same effect on me laddie. :luvbed:

nope, Heather is ok with it, i think she kinda likes it

what woman encourages her man to remove his man hair? I know the 21st century guy thing is to wax and moisturise but I think it is a load of bull.

she never told me too or encouraged, i told her i did it anyway, lol. but anyways

what woman encourages her man to remove his man hair? I know the 21st century guy thing is to wax and moisturise but I think it is a load of bull.

All the woman i know love hairy chests but hate back hair. They also like their man to have a little beer gut. The poser boy look is out.

All the woman i know love hairy chests but hate back hair. They also like their man to have a little beer gut. The poser boy look is out.


Indeed laddie that is the mark of a real man. My back does not produce hairs though which is a good thing but the chest I am fine with and the beer gut I am always working on!

Indeed laddie that is the mark of a real man. My back does not produce hairs though which is a good thing but the chest I am fine with and the beer gut I am always working on!

The only area i keep trim is the pubic area and this is for the ladies benefit.

The only area i keep trim is the pubic area and this is for the ladies benefit.


and my benefit laddie. I like your grooming style.

and my benefit laddie. I like your grooming style.

What can i say... i'm a considerate lover.

What can i say... i'm a considerate lover.


that you are laddie. The fact that you are willing to share Hoff with others proves that.

that you are laddie. The fact that you are willing to share Hoff with others proves that.

Ted Bundy Vs Jeffrey Dahmer - bare knuckle rules.... who takes it ?

Ted Bundy Vs Jeffrey Dahmer - bare knuckle rules.... who takes it ?

Some blood will be spilled here laddie. I must take Bundy in this one although Dahmer special head ripping move could easily sway the fight..

heres one laddie;

cagney and lacey theme

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BLfxl6S4Vj8

vs Happy days theme

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yLt7clQbBzo

Some blood will be spilled here laddie. I must take Bundy in this one although Dahmer special head ripping move could easily sway the fight..

All Bundy has do is tempt Dahmer with a big sirloin steak and if Dahmer takes the bait, then he gets an instant erection and passes out from lack of blood to the brain.

Bundy easy win:boxing:

Just popped in to say hi to you lot.:kiss:

Just popped in to say hi to you lot.:kiss:


We've sure missed you boxclever, we ended up switiching to homosexuality after you left. Although it was still enjoyable and I plan to continue :luvbed:

heres one laddie;

cagney and lacey theme

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BLfxl6S4Vj8

vs Happy days theme

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yLt7clQbBzo


It's a tough un' Southpaw but i think happy days gets the nod by ud - 116-112 on all three scorecards.

It's a tough un' Southpaw but i think happy days gets the nod by ud - 116-112 on all three scorecards.

I would have to agree laddie.

I would have to agree laddie.

Great minds, babe.

Quantum leap

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j_N8D_nJlp4

Vs

The Equalizer

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uB1NiNKwueE

Who takes this one ?

Great minds, babe.

Quantum leap

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j_N8D_nJlp4

Vs

The Equalizer

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uB1NiNKwueE

Who takes this one ?

Has to be The Equalizer laddie, sweet sweet Equalizer.

Has to be The Equalizer laddie, sweet sweet Equalizer.

Anyone on this site that you would love to equalize ?

Anyone on this site that you would love to equalize ?


I know who I'd like to multiply :luvbed:

I know who I'd like to multiply :luvbed:

Platinummatt ? :luvbed:

Any of you guys willing to trade some boxing dvds?

I've made a thread about it in the Limey Lounge, but no-one is replying :grumble:

Platinummatt ? :luvbed:


I must say matty has become much more shaggable in recent times, would you agree laddie? And on that subject have you had a sweet cup of Hoffee today?

I must say matty has become much more shaggable in recent times, would you agree laddie? And on that subject have you had a sweet cup of Hoffee today?

Matt has become seriously shaggable and no.... i haven't had a cup of sweet Hoffee, today. :(

what is a Planker or plunker???

what is a Planker or plunker???

An idiot...

An idiot...

oh.............yeah that would make sense,lol

oh.............yeah that would make sense,lol

lol why?????

i dunno...............

i dunno...............

KK lol.....

what is a Planker or plunker???

plonker. do you not have only fools and horses?

my nipples are hard

my nipples are hard

are they producing milk?

are they producing milk?

actaully yes they are, and Dye is the coolest Limey

but Stinger is pretty damn cool i must admit, i wish i was as cool as Stinger and Dye

actaully yes they are, and Dye is the coolest Limey

can i have a suck?

i got hit so hard in the balls 2 weeks ago and i can still feel it, i wonder if i can still have children.

i got hit so hard in the balls 2 weeks ago and i can still feel it, i wonder if i can still have children.

there only one way to find out ;)

there only one way to find out ;)

i know i am an idiot but i want a kid when i am 20??? how ****ed up is that?

i know i am an idiot but i want a kid when i am 20??? how ****ed up is that?


I couldn't support a kid right now, and I don't want any yet. I think 30 + is good but it's a personal preference. Find a girl the same age who wants a kid at 20 as well and make it happen!

what about this one laddie

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bykGaVXx3Ck

I'd do anything for a cup of Hoffee.

what about this one laddie

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bykGaVXx3Ck

Kitt's a lucky bastard getting to feel the Hoff's warm buttocks on his leathery upholstery.

Evening bum boys.

Is all well?

Evening bum boys.

Is all well?

Where have you been, my love ?

Where have you been, my love ?

The usual laddie. At work and then the boozer. Nothing bastard special.

Laddie, a question for yer, why does beer taste ****in horrible when you are drinking while you are walking somewhere?

The usual laddie. At work and then the boozer. Nothing bastard special.

Laddie, a question for yer, why does beer taste ****in horrible when you are drinking while you are walking somewhere?

I have absolutely no idea. Flat lager is the worst tasting beverage ever though.
Well, except for cider.

I have absolutely no idea. Flat lager is the worst tasting beverage ever though.
Well, except for cider.

It ****in baffles me so it does. I was walking home tonight and drinking a can at the same time and it tasted so ****in **** that i felt like throwing the cunt away...but that would be a sin so it would.

Shall we do a profile attack tonight my darling?

It ****in baffles me so it does. I was walking home tonight and drinking a can at the same time and it tasted so ****in **** that i felt like throwing the cunt away...but that would be a sin so it would.

Shall we do a profile attack tonight my darling?

And the next edition of - Get to know a Limey, perhaps ?

And the next edition of - Get to know a Limey, perhaps ?

Yeah, its dye i think. You got any questions for the hyperactive love sick shag monkey?

Yeah, its dye i think. You got any questions for the hyperactive love sick shag monkey?

ask him what the name of his girl is. I keep forgetting.

who wants to play with my gun

Yeah, its dye i think. You got any questions for the hyperactive love sick shag monkey?

So it's - Get to know an honorary Limey then ? a world first.

As for the questions.... i'll get me thinking cap on.

who wants to play with my gun

You still want Hot Fuzz, babe ?

ask him what the name of his girl is. I keep forgetting.
Me too. He only mentions her now and again so it's bastard hard to remember so it is.
who wants to play with my gun
Hand it over then Jimmy. The anti ginge coalition could do with some extra firepower.

So it's - Get to know an honorary Limey then ? a world first.

As for the questions.... i'll get me thinking cap on.

As will I. Lets make it a good un laddie.

As will I. Lets make it a good un laddie.

How about:

What made him switch over from food loving fat Yank to Banter loving thin Limey ?

Heather or a fella - Which one has bigger balls ?

Do him and Kaynan ever plan on doing something about the sexual tension that is so rife between the two of them.

HOLY MOTHER OF GOD.. that Kingdosia is on thick headed ego maniac...
It must suck being that ugly and miserable all the time...:pat:

HOLY MOTHER OF GOD.. that Kingdosia is on thick headed ego maniac...
It must suck being that ugly and miserable all the time...:pat:

He needs a father figure very much me thinks. Hoff's the daddy, leave it to him.

How about:

What made him switch over from food loving fat Yank to Banter loving thin Limey ?

Heather or a fella - Which one has bigger balls ?

Do him and Kaynan ever plan on doing something about the sexual tension that is so rife between the two of them.
Good questions laddie. I have one meself about his relationship with kaynan so i may use that one.
HOLY MOTHER OF GOD.. that Kingdosia is on thick headed ego maniac...
It must suck being that ugly and miserable all the time...:pat:
The dosia has lost his ****in mind. It's pointless arguing with the cunt Welter.

You still want Hot Fuzz, babe ?

that I do mate if you have it

that I do mate if you have it

Go to the Comedy section ( number 6 ) and scroll down to Hot Fuzz. Once you have done that, click on full and continue to content.

http://www3.alluc.org/alluc/movies.html

This is the same copy i had but i had trouble splitting my file.

A nice cup of Hoffee would go down a treat right about now.

A nice cup of Hoffee would go down a treat right about now.

your bleedin right there laddie, my man volcano is ready to erupt.

your bleedin right there laddie, my man volcano is ready to erupt.

I'm Pompeii..... cover me in your magma!

I'm Pompeii..... cover me in your magma!

the Hoff will have a lot of cleaning up to do when he gets back... :hitit:

Where's my laddie tonight? :puppy_dog

Where's my laddie tonight? :puppy_dog

I need a bit of firm scottish behind :hitit: . And where's Dyna, he needs to do his bleedin questions so he does.

he passed out by his sofa

I need a bit of firm scottish behind :hitit: . And where's Dyna, he needs to do his bleedin questions so he does.
That he ****in does. And he wants to call himself a limey? I'll have his limey badge of honour taken back off of him if the cunt continues to neglect his duties.

he passed out by his sofa
It would not suprise me...lets hope he wakes up soon and is in the mood for some bum love.

Oasis Lad has left your arms, in search of me, Hoffy.

Awright lads ? i went out on the piss, took drugs, got into fights and just generally acted like a twat..... life is good!

Oasis Lad has left your arms, in search of me, Hoffy.

Why don't you do Dyna's questions for him seeing as he wont pull his finger out ?

Awright lads ? i went out on the piss, took drugs, got into fights and just generally acted like a twat..... life is good!


you know it makes sense laddie, congradulations babes you have proved your sexy scottishness. :hitit:

Hi boys.

what have i missed?

I came here for bum fun and found none.. :(

..........................

Life is good.

Life is good.

why is that babes?

why is that babes?

Because i am living the high life.

High life = ladies, drugs and Southpaw.

Because i am living the high life.

High life = ladies, drugs and Southpaw.


may I bask in your glory laddie and share some of the happiness?

Bumcorn!!!!!!

may I bask in your glory laddie and share some of the happiness?

Of course you may!

Of course you may!


thats what i like to hear laddie :luvbed:

thats what i like to hear laddie :luvbed:

I feel like ****! Comfort me, Southpaw.

I feel like ****! Comfort me, Southpaw.

after a high comes a downer.

let David Brent comfort you;

"Life is full of peaks and troughs. You don't know whether you are in a trough until your climbing out or on a peak until your coming down. If you want a rainbow you've got to put up with the rain. And do you know which "philosopher" said that? Dolly Parton. And people say shes just a big pair of tits"

I hope you are better now babes.

I feel like ****! Comfort me, Southpaw.

Why, ran out of crystal meth and bumbuddies?

Why, ran out of crystal meth and bumbuddies?

Laddie will never run out of bum buddies. I am always there for him.

Why, ran out of crystal meth and bumbuddies?

I never run out of these two but i still felt like ****.

I never run out of these two but i still felt like ****.

What seems to be the problem laddie?

Would some sweet bum love help?

What seems to be the problem laddie?

Would some sweet bum love help?

Just went overboard with my Alcohol consumption and yes.... some bum love would go down a treat.

Laddie will never run out of bum buddies. I am always there for him.

you and me both babes.

Just went overboard with my Alcohol consumption and yes.... some bum love would go down a treat.

You must've downed a ****in ****load of frank gallaghers favorite poison to be feeling that bad. Come over here my darling and let the Hoff give you some tender loving care.

Oasis_lad's alcohol intake:

Thursday - 3 litres of Cider and 1 bottle of Vodka

Friday - same as Thursday

Saturday - 2 bottles of red Wine, 2 litres of Cider and 1 Bottle of Vodka.

you and me both babes.

Aye, it can never be said that laddie is short of a trouser snake to play with.

Southpaw, me and laddie might start up a pimp stash challenge. Would you be up for growing a lovely pimp stash and upping a picture of you wearing the sexy stash? If we do it there'll be a good few points for the winner.

Oasis_lad's alcohol intake:

Thursday - 3 litres of Cider and 1 bottle of Vodka

Friday - same as Thursday

Saturday - 2 bottles of red Wine, 2 litres of Cider and 1 Bottle of Vodka.

Our frank would be proud so he would.

Our frank would be proud so he would.

Laddie's setting a fine example for us so he is southpaw.

I try my best but can only hope to achieve half of what the great Frank Gallagher has.

I try my best but can only hope to achieve half of what the great Frank Gallagher has.

In my eyes laddie, you already have.

In my eyes laddie, you already have.

You're too kind to this bum boy.

You're too kind to this bum boy.

It's a curse laddie. :kiss:

I'm off to make a sexy sandwhich..... be back in a tick!

I'm off to make a sexy sandwhich..... be back in a tick!


I've got a sausage role at the ready :hitit:

I've got a sausage role at the ready :hitit:

I've always said it.

Laddies and southpaws sausages > walls sausages.

I'm back. I just ended up making a microwaveable beef-burger.

I'm back. I just ended up making a microwaveable beef-burger.

I might cook a pot noodle...

I'm back. I just ended up making a microwaveable beef-burger.

I'm feeling a wee bit peckish meself laddie. Me options are either to lean over and start eating a toblerone choccie bar or to go downstairs and make eggs on toast.

I think I'll make eggs on toast. I have to go downstairs to get another can anyway.

I'm feeling a wee bit peckish meself laddie. Me options are either to lean over and start eating a toblerone choccie bar or to go downstairs and make eggs on toast.

I think I'll make eggs on toast. I have to go downstairs to get another can anyway.

You have made the right choice. :hitit:

You have made the right choice. :hitit:

I knew you'd approve.


Southpaw, your culinary skills bleeding impress me so they do...I had a pot noodle today an all.

I knew you'd approve.


Southpaw, your culinary skills bleeding impress me so they do...I had a pot noodle today an all.


indeed, i'll be damned the day i sit down to a roast with the family. give me a pot noodle and a stella any bleedin day of the week.

indeed, i'll be damned the day i sit down to a roast with the family. give me a pot noodle and a stella any bleedin day of the week.

We are so alike, babes. :luvbed: :hitit:

indeed, i'll be damned the day i sit down to a roast with the family. give me a pot noodle and a stella any bleedin day of the week.

My cunting sentiments exactly...I'll raise a toast to that so I will :beerchug:

My cunting sentiments exactly...I'll raise a toast to that so I will :beerchug:

here here :beerchug:

Only a stella and a pot noodle can make day time tv almost bearable.

Only a stella and a pot noodle can make day time tv almost bearable.

especially with Jeremy cunting Kyle the main ****in attraction. :nonono:

especially with Jeremy cunting Kyle the main ****in attraction. :nonono:

He needs a Stella can inserted in his rectum for his cuntin' cheek.

He needs a Stella can inserted in his rectum for his cuntin' cheek.

I watched a wee bit of Jezza cunting Kyle today. The bird i was watching him with actually liked the cunt.

I can honestly say that I wished the curse of gingerness on her for liking such a righteous cunting bastard.

I watched a wee bit of Jezza cunting Kyle today. The bird i was watching him with actually liked the cunt.

I can honestly say that I wished the curse of gingerness on her for liking such a righteous cunting bastard.

Women aren't good judges of character but that still isn't an excuse.

I watched a wee bit of Jezza cunting Kyle today. The bird i was watching him with actually liked the cunt.

I can honestly say that I wished the curse of gingerness on her for liking such a righteous cunting bastard.

somthing about grown men crying on that show always hits a soar spot with me.

somthing about grown men crying on that show always hits a soar spot with me.

Men in general have lost their balls. Any man that goes to therapy, needs a cuntin' good slap i say.

Men in general have lost their balls. Any man that goes to therapy, needs a cuntin' good slap i say.

I bleedin agree laddie. Men today are a bunch of Enuch's.

I bleedin agree laddie. Men today are a bunch of Enuch's.

Bumboys arent what they used to be Southpaw :nonono:

Bumboys arent what they used to be Southpaw :nonono:

that they aren't babes, somthing has to be done.

"I may not always keep my cool like the Fonz but my love for my children has given me plenty of Happy Days" - Henry Winkler

"I may not always keep my cool like the Fonz but my love for my children has given me plenty of Happy Days" - Henry Winkler


classic quote. Homer Simpson should learn from him.

classic quote. Homer Simpson should learn from him.

"When will I learn? The answer to life's problems aren't at the bottom of a bottle, they're on TV!" - Homer Simpson