I was thinking this morning (**** sleep) about random **** that has occurred throughout my life. While thinking about these random events my mind traveled back to my elementary school (Kindergarten through 5th grade). I realize there were a lot of weird thing that happened in elementary school surrounding some pretty weird people. I imagine my school stories are actually probably relatively tame considering I went to an extremely small school in which the only real troubled people usually came from the trailer park near by the school.

In the first grade there was a fellow by the name of Mark. He was a pretty oddball but considering everybody is at that age, none of us really thought much of it. However, soon after meeting mark we determined he smelled, really bad, almost always. Not a month would go by that Mark wouldn't **** his pants in the class and it would be the teacher and students who smelled it first, and Mark; too embarssed and to say anything, would sit in his **** until the teacher escorted him to the nurses office.

At this age I had only truly known 1 other black person who was my age. His name was Josh, and he was my best friend for a long period of time throughout the summer. My next encounter with what I assume is a crack baby by the name of Charles. He was extremely lanky, and a rather mishapen head (kinda like BeetleJuice from Howard Stern). He didn't seem extremely stupid, but he had the worst temper I've ever met. He also had emotional problems to boot. Twice he cut the girls hair in front of him with scissors... The first time was rather minor but the second time he hacked off the bottom end of a pig tail.

He was probably the closest thing to a bully in our grade since my grade was actually rather well behaved for the most parts. He simply did as he wanted and I don't think the teachers were even used to it. Charles was also extremely flexible and would often do the splits in an attempt to prove he was good and had a black belt in karate. One day a girl, Heather, provoked him saying how he wasn't a black belt in karate because he was too stupid to do anything right. Charles response was to spin around and kick Heather in the face as hard as he could as the rest of us looked on in front of the bus stop, quite awe struck.

We saw Charles a couple of weeks later back at school and it was quite clear something had changed in him... or so he thought. He was much more quiet and didn't have any real outbursts until he began using a scissors in class to cut our random things out of paper on the desk. The teacher told him to stop, his response was to throw a fit while threatening to stab her with the scissors. We had no guards, and very few male teachers at the school, so they got the janitor in an attempt to deal with Charles. Charles, most likely feeling the surge of power with us out of the room and the entire school focusing attention on him, thought he could do anything. He charged the custodian and tried to stab him... Mr Kelly (janitor) isn't really used to this situation and his own thoughts went more into the mind set of self defense. Mr Kelly hit Charles with a right cross that sent to the floor.

I smile when I think of my Elementary school days. I'll recall some more tales later most likely. Feel free to tell any odd, or ammusing story involving elementary school and preferably about the oddball people you met there.

What elementary school did you go to?

hahahahahaahahahahaha, I was a right rebel in primary school (English equivelent) Was in trouble all the time, anything from answering back to mini riots in the playground....

Hahahah, the bit about that dude hacking off that girls pig tail was ****ing hilarious. I remember being told a girl that i knew a couple of years back was walking through this rough estate near to where i live, and she had here whole pony tail cut off and didnt know what to do for the next day at school.

In primary little happened. I mean, most of it is so ****ing dumb and minor its not worth writing about. In secondary thats when it kicked off really good. Especially in the science classes (secondary school is junior high over there? ages 11-16 or 17). Anyway, of course, we got given equipment in science to do the experiment, but if it was anything remotely useful in terrorising anyone, then people would start to **** around with it. A couple of examples where, we were doing an experiment with a potato, and before anything even started the teacher said to us "if i see any potato's flying around the room, then somebody is going to be in trouble". Of course, none of us had thought of this until he mentioned it, and what do you know, about 3 minutes later when we start, this boy had thrown a potato full blast at this other boys head, which then missed and hit the locker and put a massive dent and loads of potato everywhere. He got suspended from science labs for starting off a potato war in the classroom.

Another one, in science, was where we got given these things called splints. I dunno if you have them over there, but basically its a thin stick of wood that sets alight easily, and its used to light a bunsen burner without getting burned. Anyway, we were all set to go for our experiment and everyone went to get their equipment. This boy Louis, who was always messing about, went straight to the splints, got all of them but them on the window ledge in our classroom (inside not outside), and then pulled the lighter out of his pocket and started a bonfire in the corner of our class. Then because the teacher was looking around, to hide it, he closed the curtain haha. But that made the flame even worse and everything was getting burned and ****. Seriously, if any of your guys had been there you would have been laughing your head off.

A couple of the others were stuff like the same boy, Louis, throwing all the equipment out of a second storey classroom. He was throwing test tubes, conical flasks stopwatches and everything. Then to top it off he threw a massive power pack out the window....

Outside of science we had to be a little more inventive. When it snowed once, some dude picked up a snow ball and then put loads of that mud slush **** on top of it and cucked it at a teachers head. That was ****ing hilarious....

Another one was when this small group of kids were running down the corridoors (against the rules), and we had this teacher who would literally go to any measure to find out who did it and then punish you. She noticed this group of kids running and began running after them in a proper serious face and everything. That was pretty funny, just because you wouldnt expect a teacher to do that. (she chased them through 3 departments and then lost them).

Ill share some more later. Ok they might not be like "oh yeah my teacher got shot in the head with a crossbow" but they were pretty funny at the time.

I have a pretty intresting class (agegroup).

In the first grade my class had a huge wrestling free for all everyday at lunch. We would run around running into each other occasionally punching and kicking when no one was looking. It was actually a lot of fun because none of us could do much damage to each other.

Fifth grade was a rough year for some people. There was a fight because some kid had never played soccer, got slidetackled and got pissed off. He got back up and just started wailing away at the one who slide takled him. He promptly ran away and we stood there awed for a couple seconds then ran after him. I dont remeber what happened but somehow he escaped till the teachers caught him. Then some other dude broke someone elses leg by jumping on it. And two girls faught. That was pretty funny to watch. We had this whole crowd around them, I managed to get front row, and some people were egging them on to fight. So one girl punches the other girl and tries to kick her but the other girl grabs her leg and flips her around. Again I dont remeber how it ended but they both had black eyes.

i had some weird experiences in elementary school, the best one being on my first day of school in grade 1 a kid stood on top of a huge folded up lunch table and did a swan dive backwards onto the tile floor, cracking his head open. i remember the kid i was standing beside saying he could see the kid's brain as he lay unconcious on the floor with a circle of us curious kids standing around him

I peed my pants once.

And had to wear the "emergency" school shorts.

The "HEY EVERYONE....I PISSED MYSELF, AND NOW IM WEARING THESE ****ING HORRIBLE TIGHT PAIR OF SUMMER SHORTS!!" pants.

I was in elementary school in the mid to late 70s - back when kids generally didn't dream of talking back to their teachers and back when pricipals were allowed to "paddle" and spank children. When I was in third grade, a teacher confiscated a note my friend and I had been writing back and forth. We had used the word "bull****" in the note so were sent to the principal. My punishment was to watch my friend get "paddled". The principal felt she was a bad influence. Later, that same principal was drunk at a holiday party and hit on my mom. They were both single. He insisted on walkeing her to her car and tried to kiss her. She rejected him. I was in the car, but it didn't seem to bother him. hmmmmmm. :confused:

I remember that throughout elementary school years, the school nurse would conduct "lice" checks twice a year in every class. If she found any lice - you where immediately sent home, so it was very obvious who had it and who didn't. You were branded for life if you had it. Thank God, I never let anyone use my brush or hat and actually bathed nightly. lol!!

The worst kid in our school was a second grader, Mark. Mark was wanted sexually explore and most likely a victim of sexual abuse himself. He discovered a very large Banyan tree (he name the "love tree") on the outskirts of the playground - out of teacher's direct view. He would try to lure girls there to "pretend" they were married. little perve. He used to write me notes saying he wanted to kiss and lay on top on me and mush our bodies together. It freaked me out. We would all avoid him.
Someone told the teacher, but nothing was ever done as it was too "delicate" of an issue. They simply advised us to stay away from him.

Reading Dirt's recount of the smelly kid reminded me of a very poor kid at our school who was nicknamed Oscar because he smelled like he liked in a trash can. Kids were brutal to him.

Oh and in fifth grade we had a hussler - Bryan. He would bring all kids of **** to school and sell it and made huge profits. Back then a pack of Bubbalicious or Bubble Yum was .25 but he would sell one piece for .25 He also made homemade cinnamon toothpicks out of cinnamon oil (hot as ****!!) and various other items. No one would buy from anyone else. It was pretty funny.

What elementary school did you go to?

A tiny little school on the outskirts of Oshkosh called Sunset Elementary. It has since been condemed in recent years to a ridiculous amount of mold in the vent system, go figure.

Another story, this one always makes me laugh. Our school was kinda divided into half, with kindergarten and 1st on one side, and 2-5th on the other, and each had a small bathroom on their side. In 2nd grade a friend of mine, Nick, told us that he really had to go bathroom. The school policy was no more than 2 people from 1 class could go to the bathroom at once. Upon hearing this, a friend of mine and I quickly ran to the teacher and told her we had to go to the bathroom... Thus causing Nick to have to wait while we took our sweet time. My buddy went back, allowing Nick to go, but I held the door shut and he **** his pants in the hallway. It always bring a smile to my face thinking of this story...

aha, I just remember grade 4 we would always play football (american football) at lunch and recess and it would always be the 8 of us vs these 8 others ALWAYS. Anyways, we scored a touchdown which was a big deal back then and an oddball we call Pede stood on a bench with a pylon and threatening to hit someone with it.(he was a funny kid even back then) so this tall blonde guy who thought his **** didnt stink said what you gonna do hit me with a pylon? So pede wacks him in the face with a pylon and the rest of that team chased him but they never caught him.

;) ahhhhhhh elementary

I was in elementary school in the mid to late 70s - back when kids generally didn't dream of talking back to their teachers and back when pricipals were allowed to "paddle" and spank children. When I was in third grade, a teacher confiscated a note my friend and I had been writing back and forth. We had used the word "bull****" in the note so were sent to the principal. My punishment was to watch my friend get "paddled". The principal felt she was a bad influence. Later, that same principal was drunk at a holiday party and hit on my mom. They were both single. He insisted on walkeing her to her car and tried to kiss her. She rejected him. I was in the car, but it didn't seem to bother him. hmmmmmm. :confused:

I remember that throughout elementary school years, the school nurse would conduct "lice" checks twice a year in every class. If she found any lice - you where immediately sent home, so it was very obvious who had it and who didn't. You were branded for life if you had it. Thank God, I never let anyone use my brush or hat and actually bathed nightly. lol!!

The worst kid in our school was a second grader, Mark. Mark was wanted sexually explore and most likely a victim of sexual abuse himself. He discovered a very large Banyan tree (he name the "love tree") on the outskirts of the playground - out of teacher's direct view. He would try to lure girls there to "pretend" they were married. little perve. He used to write me notes saying he wanted to kiss and lay on top on me and mush our bodies together. It freaked me out. We would all avoid him.
Someone told the teacher, but nothing was ever done as it was too "delicate" of an issue. They simply advised us to stay away from him.

Reading Dirt's recount of the smelly kid reminded me of a very poor kid at our school who was nicknamed Oscar because he smelled like he liked in a trash can. Kids were brutal to him.

Oh and in fifth grade we had a hussler - Bryan. He would bring all kids of **** to school and sell it and made huge profits. Back then a pack of Bubbalicious or Bubble Yum was .25 but he would sell one piece for .25 He also made homemade cinnamon toothpicks out of cinnamon oil (hot as ****!!) and various other items. No one would buy from anyone else. It was pretty funny.


ah, so that's what happened to you, baby...i'm still saving a place under the banyan tree, we could still turn it into the love tree. baby, i'd still like to lay on top of you and mush our bodies together and poke u with apadravya...love, mark

A tiny little school on the outskirts of Oshkosh called Sunset Elementary. It has since been condemed in recent years to a ridiculous amount of mold in the vent system, go figure.

Another story, this one always makes me laugh. Our school was kinda divided into half, with kindergarten and 1st on one side, and 2-5th on the other, and each had a small bathroom on their side. In 2nd grade a friend of mine, Nick, told us that he really had to go bathroom. The school policy was no more than 2 people from 1 class could go to the bathroom at once. Upon hearing this, a friend of mine and I quickly ran to the teacher and told her we had to go to the bathroom... Thus causing Nick to have to wait while we took our sweet time. My buddy went back, allowing Nick to go, but I held the door shut and he **** his pants in the hallway. It always bring a smile to my face thinking of this story...
Haahahahahahhahaha.

That reminds me of a story i was involved in once. In our secondary school, for some odd reason we had a "one way system" around the corridoor. I think it was for health and safety, and basically meant you couldnt go a certain way down a corridoor because you might get crushed by all the kids coming the other way. Anyway one day me and 2 other friends shut this door that was the exit to this one corridoor. Once we shut it we just held it shut with all our strength. Seriously no joke, a whole yeargroup of kids was trying to get out of these doors and we were just holding them shut. The kids right by the door were getting swuashed up against the glass and stuff, it was soo ****ing funny i couldnt breath properly after it because i was laughing so much. But we got caught in the end and got in some pretty serious ****, but it was worth it... :cool:

lol!!!
it would not surprise me if Mark was on america's most wanted...
or at least has a record for rape or child moelstation.
He was just CREEPY as hell!! :eek:
ah, so that's what happened to you, baby...i'm still saving a place under the banyan tree, we could still turn it into the love tree. baby, i'd still like to lay on top of you and mush our bodies together and poke u with apadravya...love, mark

Haahahahahahhahaha.

That reminds me of a story i was involved in once. In our secondary school, for some odd reason we had a "one way system" around the corridoor. I think it was for health and safety, and basically meant you couldnt go a certain way down a corridoor because you might get crushed by all the kids coming the other way. Anyway one day me and 2 other friends shut this door that was the exit to this one corridoor. Once we shut it we just held it shut with all our strength. Seriously no joke, a whole yeargroup of kids was trying to get out of these doors and we were just holding them shut. The kids right by the door were getting swuashed up against the glass and stuff, it was soo ****ing funny i couldnt breath properly after it because i was laughing so much. But we got caught in the end and got in some pretty serious ****, but it was worth it... :cool:

Hhehe. That sounds the kind of stuff kids get up to in every seconday school across the country. Love it.

I remember we always had "play day" the last day of the year and I was suspended from two of those because one time I locked 5 younger graders in a rink that was beside our school until 5:30 and their parents went lookin and found me and two other guys locking them in.

What else.....my grace 6 teacher really liked me and trusted me that much that I was part of the "note club", where I would take notes from people's desks and get them in trouble the next day...HOLY **** I WAS A *** BACK THEN, in grade 6 I would read all day cuz i wanted to get smarter. Oh how times have changed.

lol!!!
it would not surprise me if Mark was on america's most wanted...
or at least has a record for rape or child moelstation.
He was just CREEPY as hell!! :eek:



he probably changed his name to brian j. peppers - his photo is available at www.rensa.com or something

the love tree...ha ha ha...i'm never gonna forget that

I was thinking this morning (**** sleep) about random **** that has occurred throughout my life. While thinking about these random events my mind traveled back to my elementary school (Kindergarten through 5th grade). I realize there were a lot of weird thing that happened in elementary school surrounding some pretty weird people. I imagine my school stories are actually probably relatively tame considering I went to an extremely small school in which the only real troubled people usually came from the trailer park near by the school.

In the first grade there was a fellow by the name of Mark. He was a pretty oddball but considering everybody is at that age, none of us really thought much of it. However, soon after meeting mark we determined he smelled, really bad, almost always. Not a month would go by that Mark wouldn't **** his pants in the class and it would be the teacher and students who smelled it first, and Mark; too embarssed and to say anything, would sit in his **** until the teacher escorted him to the nurses office.

At this age I had only truly known 1 other black person who was my age. His name was Josh, and he was my best friend for a long period of time throughout the summer. My next encounter with what I assume is a crack baby by the name of Charles. He was extremely lanky, and a rather mishapen head (kinda like BeetleJuice from Howard Stern). He didn't seem extremely stupid, but he had the worst temper I've ever met. He also had emotional problems to boot. Twice he cut the girls hair in front of him with scissors... The first time was rather minor but the second time he hacked off the bottom end of a pig tail.

He was probably the closest thing to a bully in our grade since my grade was actually rather well behaved for the most parts. He simply did as he wanted and I don't think the teachers were even used to it. Charles was also extremely flexible and would often do the splits in an attempt to prove he was good and had a black belt in karate. One day a girl, Heather, provoked him saying how he wasn't a black belt in karate because he was too stupid to do anything right. Charles response was to spin around and kick Heather in the face as hard as he could as the rest of us looked on in front of the bus stop, quite awe struck.

We saw Charles a couple of weeks later back at school and it was quite clear something had changed in him... or so he thought. He was much more quiet and didn't have any real outbursts until he began using a scissors in class to cut our random things out of paper on the desk. The teacher told him to stop, his response was to throw a fit while threatening to stab her with the scissors. We had no guards, and very few male teachers at the school, so they got the janitor in an attempt to deal with Charles. Charles, most likely feeling the surge of power with us out of the room and the entire school focusing attention on him, thought he could do anything. He charged the custodian and tried to stab him... Mr Kelly (janitor) isn't really used to this situation and his own thoughts went more into the mind set of self defense. Mr Kelly hit Charles with a right cross that sent to the floor.

I smile when I think of my Elementary school days. I'll recall some more tales later most likely. Feel free to tell any odd, or ammusing story involving elementary school and preferably about the oddball people you met there.
...





what? :confused:

A tiny little school on the outskirts of Oshkosh called Sunset Elementary. It has since been condemed in recent years to a ridiculous amount of mold in the vent system, go figure.

Another story, this one always makes me laugh. Our school was kinda divided into half, with kindergarten and 1st on one side, and 2-5th on the other, and each had a small bathroom on their side. In 2nd grade a friend of mine, Nick, told us that he really had to go bathroom. The school policy was no more than 2 people from 1 class could go to the bathroom at once. Upon hearing this, a friend of mine and I quickly ran to the teacher and told her we had to go to the bathroom... Thus causing Nick to have to wait while we took our sweet time. My buddy went back, allowing Nick to go, but I held the door shut and he **** his pants in the hallway. It always bring a smile to my face thinking of this story...

...


OMG

Nautilus +2 post count.... :D