View Full Version : Talking to the police...


nance
01-26-2005, 05:33 PM
WARNING: LONG POST



My daughter got called into the resource officer's office today.

He explained to her what a terrorist threat was and pretty much accused her of making one. He criticized our parenting skills and then had to eat his words (so to speak) when my daughter PROVED that she didn't make any threats of any sort other than to defend herself from those who have been harassing and tormenting her over the last few months.

Her dad and I went into his office to discuss this with him and got his side of the whole thing. There was some misunderstanding on Ash's part, but we also understood him to be using SCARE tactics. We calmly (it wasn't easy remaining calm) explained to him that she's been the victim for the last 2-3 months and he FINALLY asked questions about what started it all. Once he heard, he was much nicer and more understanding to Ash's position and realized that he did make assumptions that he shouldn't have. I partially blame him for not reading the info thoroughly like he should have. He read over the statements, but not thoroughly.

Now the police are involved and the officer has more info of what has been happening and if any of it continues, we can and will be getting a restraining order against these two girls who have made it their mission in life to harass my daughter for someone else's decision.

The quick rundown of it all: A girl wasn't allowed back on the flag team and she decided that it was my daughter's fault. That she forced the administration to not allow her back on the team. Her friends, who were on the team, quit in protest, then have proceeded to harass Ash. Over the last few months she has received phone calls, threats on the internet (online journals) and finally a face to face threat of her needing to "watch her back" on school grounds. Ash admits that she most likely brought the last part on with a post on her online journal where she told "to those following my parents and giving me attitude" ...."If you confront me....I can kick your ass" to which she can. She never addressed with a name, nor did she threaten them. Her last sentence was "I don't want to hurt them"

She hates confrontations, but she also won't back down if pushed. I'm proud of how she has handled herself and we both hope that this will just now go away. There is one more meeting to attend and that is the mediation meeting that the school would like to see happen. They mentioned peer mediation to which Ash told them no...administrative or not at all. We now hold the power over the one girl's head to have her suspended from school as she admitted to the threat. The other girl (the one not allowed back on the team) openly posted on her online journal that she "harasses flag team members/their mothers....worship ashley otherwise known as queen Z".

Ashes just wants them to go away. So do I. I'm tired of standing on the sidelines not able to do anything. Now maybe, somebody can do something. Ash doesn't want to go to school because of all this crap and I can't says I blame her.

Purity
01-26-2005, 05:57 PM
all this over flags

nance
01-26-2005, 06:42 PM
pitiful, isn't it?

HockeyFighter
01-27-2005, 02:14 AM
I've killed people over less.

nance
01-27-2005, 03:00 PM
The girl who made the threat got the same treatment from the officer with the added fact that she could be arrested if we chose to press charges.

Her mother approached me last night and we talked. She wanted to get this whole thing resolved and that's what we tried to do. My idea of resolving things and hers are two different ideas. Ash wasn't happy either afterwards, but she'll get a second chance.

The mother didn't want to hear what her daughter had done. She wasn't aware of every thing. She is now. Ash and the other girl talked for a bit and Ash apologized for what she did (the internet post) and told her why she did it. The other girl didn't really have too much to say, but did say she was sorry too. Ash said that she just wanted it to stop. No promises or anything, so we'll see. I called the school to let them know that it was taken care of and they said they still have to have the mediation meeting to cover their own butts. SO round two.

The mom stated that she wanted it resolved, but how can you resolve it completely if don't admit what you did wrong to begin with? I don't understand that. I'm a firm believer in AAAL

Admit it
Apologize for it
Atone for it (where possible)
Learn from it

That's what I've taught my kids and the girls have learned from it. Dan's learning too....just slowly.

Oh well....the other girl has to live with herself over it. My Ashes feels better in the fact that she did as I taught her. :-) I'm proud of her.

AgonYx0
01-28-2005, 04:20 PM
[QUOTE=madcrewmom


Apologize for it.[/QUOTE]




so should they apologize even if they didnt do anything wrong?

Those words have never came outta my mouth only to people i love. Other then that, nope. I dont care what ive done or said.

nance
01-28-2005, 07:01 PM
[QUOTE=madcrewmom


Apologize for it.




so should they apologize even if they didnt do anything wrong?

Those words have never came outta my mouth only to people i love. Other then that, nope. I dont care what ive done or said.[/QUOTE]


The other girl admitted to threatening Ash. That's doing something wrong. The harassment has been going on for months.