View Full Version : The Dysfunctional Section of a Hallmark Card Store


nance
02-13-2004, 09:57 PM
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1.I always wanted to have someone to hold, someone to
love. And now
that you've come into my life...

(Inside card) - I've changed my mind.



2. I must admit, you brought religion into my life...

(Inside card) - I never believed in Hell until I met
you


3. As the days go by, I think how lucky I am....

(Inside card) - That you're not here to ruin it for
me.


4. Congratulations on your promotion. Before you
go....

(Inside card) - Will you take the knife from my back?
You'll probably
need it again.


5. Someday I hope to marry...

(Inside card) - Someone other than you.


6. Happy Birthday! You look great for your age....

(Inside card) - Almost lifelike!


7. When we were together, you said you'd die for me..

(Inside card) - Now we've broken up, I think it's time
to keep your promise.


8. We've been friends for a very long time...

(Inside card) - What do you say we stop?


9. I'm so miserable without you...

(Inside card) - It's almost like you're still here.


10. Congratulations on your new bundle of joy...

(Inside card) - Did you ever find out who the father
was?


11. You are such a good friend. If we were on a
sinking ship and there was only one life jacket...

(Inside card) - I'd miss you terribly and think of you
often.


12. Your friends and I wanted to do something really
special for your birthday...

(Inside card) - So we're having you put to sleep.


13. Happy Birthday, Uncle Dad!

(Available only in Alabama, Mississippi, and West
Virginia)


14. Looking back over the years we've been together, I
can't help but wonder...

(Inside card) - What was I thinking?


15. Congratulations on your wedding day!...

(Inside card) - Too bad no one likes your husband

VulgarTheClown
02-14-2004, 12:32 AM
Originally posted by madcrewmom
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~


4. Congratulations on your promotion. Before you
go....

(Inside card) - Will you take the knife from my back?
You'll probably
need it again.


7. When we were together, you said you'd die for me..

(Inside card) - Now we've broken up, I think it's time
to keep your promise.


11. You are such a good friend. If we were on a
sinking ship and there was only one life jacket...

(Inside card) - I'd miss you terribly and think of you
often.


12. Your friends and I wanted to do something really
special for your birthday...

(Inside card) - So we're having you put to sleep.




these were really funny!!