blah.
i feel like ****. this desk is a mess. coffee isn't kickin in quick enough. i hate monday mornings. i hate people who work in the "i.t." departments. they are worthless and if you work in one, congratulate yourself for being a waste of human.

there's too much **** to do today but i'm too stupid to know even how to get started. too hungover to even clean my desk. i can't even think of any clever lil smart-ass replies to throw into other people's threads.

**** i need to go to the dentist! **** i need dental coverage. i can't wait to go to bed tonight.





so i just left this appraiser a message with my eyes closed and my head down on the desk. these headsets are really cool cause you can save shoulder energy by not having to hold a phone up to your ear.

i can't believe all the lame **** i just typed out. **** you all.

ok ok. i just gotta get a lil organized. one step at a time...

1. type this post
2. drink cup #2
3. straighten up all this **** on the desk
4. write out my ususal "**** 2 do 2day" list
5. log in


ok. doin good.

Well, reading your posts I can see myself as a lucky guy, I've come of work for 2 hours.....

mmmmm...no, now I have to go to university....

some dude, that i don't even know, in the cafeteria just told me i looked like ****. well i feel like **** so at least we're keepin it real :)

Originally posted by Purity
some dude, that i don't even know, in the cafeteria just told me i looked like ****. well i feel like **** so at least we're keepin it real :)

Maybe you should stop drinking on Sundays??? hmmm.....

My guess is the people in I.T. departments think you are worthless too

yes mom. drinking on sundays isn't the brightest of moves but oh well.

no gman. i.t. departments are worthless and they know it. they can't think our department is worthless but they CAN think we have ****ty attitudes. **** em.




anywayz, steps #1-5 have been completed and i'm still stuck on stupid this morning.

Originally posted by Purity
yes mom. drinking on sundays isn't the brightest of moves but oh well.

no gman. i.t. departments are worthless and they know it. they can't think our department is worthless but they CAN think we have ****ty attitudes. **** em.




anywayz, steps #1-5 have been completed and i'm still stuck on stupid this morning.

What is the I.T. dept?

time ta yell @ another appraiser. let's see how this goes...

Originally posted by madcrewmom
What is the I.T. dept?

Internal Trash.

basically you can get an $80K/year job by waving a useless degree around and sending out repetitive emails and replies stating the verbage:
"technical difficulties"
"technicians are working to resolve"
"updates will follow"
"time of completion is unknown"





my eye itches. another person just told me i look like ****.

Yeah but they always have the big saying that if the computers didn't work nobody could do any work. I hate those guys too. Their fat assed people who are ugly and have swamp ass.

so your in I.T. too, huh Gman?

Hahahahahahhaha No ***

well so far i've dismissed i.t. and appraisers as ****sacks who make my life harder.
i'd also like to include divorce attornies to that as well. actually, all attorneys. i hate those arrogent *******s.

My morning sucks too Tony.

I'm off on Mondays :) I love Monday!!!!!!!!!!!!!

it's still 9:30.
8 more hours to go.
this coffee made me jittery but didn't wake me up.
i wanna puke.

Originally posted by Purity
it's still 9:30.
8 more hours to go.
this coffee made me jittery but didn't wake me up.
i wanna puke.

If you drink water while you are drinking, you won't have as much of a hangover. Drink water now, you've been drinking all dehydrating fluids.

water my boy.... drink lotsa water and have a salad for lunch

Originally posted by madcrewmom
If you drink water while you are drinking, you won't have as much of a hangover. Drink water now, you've been drinking all dehydrating fluids.

:lol2: :lol2:

Originally posted by Purity
blah.
i feel like ****. this desk is a mess. coffee isn't kickin in quick enough. i hate monday mornings. i hate people who work in the "i.t." departments. they are worthless and if you work in one, congratulate yourself for being a waste of human.

there's too much **** to do today but i'm too stupid to know even how to get started. too hungover to even clean my desk. i can't even think of any clever lil smart-ass replies to throw into other people's threads.

**** i need to go to the dentist! **** i need dental coverage. i can't wait to go to bed tonight.





so i just left this appraiser a message with my eyes closed and
my head down on the desk. these headsets are really cool cause you can save shoulder energy by not having to hold a phone up to your ear.

i can't believe all the lame **** i just typed out. **** you all.

I agree 100% with everything you just said, especially the hangover part and except the dental coverage because I have that.

I'll cover your dental

No thanks, my teeth are white enough.

dammit

well i just puked out 4 cups of coffee. of course the jitters are still conveniently here.

anywayz, after looking at myself in the bathroom mirror, i now see why everyone says i look like ****. i'm pale, have heroin bags, glossy eyes, and since i didn't take a shower this morning, i still have crusty gel in my messed hair.

When I'm hung over I usually puke while brushing my teeth, or more specifically my tongue, which feels like fuzz is growing on it. I too have the jitters and a ****ed up stomach, but so far no puking. I'm only gonna eat celery today.

HAHAHAH!!!! dude the toothbrush gags ****in SUCK!! you ever been hungover and puked right in the middle of a listerine swish? talk about a ****ing disaster. that **** burns.

Why do you guys eat celery or a salad on a hangover. I like a nice greasy cheesburger the day after.

Originally posted by Purity
HAHAHAH!!!! dude the toothbrush gags ****in SUCK!! you ever been hungover and puked right in the middle of a listerine swish? talk about a ****ing disaster. that **** burns.

Yeah! Or worse(grosser at least) if you ate something or drank some milk prior to puking! And Prime cut, the thought of eating something greasy almost made me hurl right now. I know some people say coat your stomach with something greasy, but that isn't for me. I generally try too eat healthy because I'm one of those people whose body QUICKLY reflects what I'm doing to it. I did have some Pepeto Bismol which tastes like ****, but has made me feel ALOT better.

i could go for some tacos right now

Drank pepto Sauturday morning and it made me throw up about 15 minutes later. I thought that **** was supposed to help.

Alka Seltzer works best for me, but I ran out again. Pepto did help settle my stomach today though. Now I just have the jitters and headache.

7up is the best. mmmm.....thoughts of 7up and that paris hilton video are makin me feel better :)

Hangover aren't that bad for me.

I love pepto bismol.

Chaser

I remember this one time I had an allergic reaation to some antibiotics I was taking... I was SO sick. At the time, I didn't know I was having a reaction to the medicine. I had just finished day 10's pills. That night, all I could eat was a few grapes and a plum. I felt like I was going to hurl so I took some anti-nausea liquid, then ralphed about 30 seconds later. That was the most insane and disgusting puke ever. Bright purple. HAHAHAHA
I just knew I was dying.

The first time I drank Absinthe I puked flourescent green.

Originally posted by Blue Dawg
The first time I drank Absinthe I puked flourescent green.

I had a lot of absinto in Portugal. That **** is wicked, it gets you MAD F'ed up.

Shot recipe: YoYo
Doubleshot(possibly triple, can't really remember) of absinto, add coffee beans, light on fire, completely cover the top of glass with hand to create a suction effect(the glass gets stuck to your hand), shake it while it's stuck to your hand real good, as you slowly release your hand sniff in the vapors(F's you up), and finally drink up....enjoy!

Sounds horrible.

The only time I have puked from drinking was in L.A. and that was made up of beer/the **** kaps was drinking and steak.

Originally posted by Bella
Sounds horrible.

No, it's actually really good. I had um, a few...

Another way is to hold a shot of absinto in your mouth, have someone light it on fire while it's stilll in your mouth, then gulp it down quickly!!! Good stuff...

Originally posted by Purity
Internal Trash.

basically you can get an $80K/year job by waving a useless degree around and sending out repetitive emails and replies stating the verbage:
"technical difficulties"
"technicians are working to resolve"
"updates will follow"
"time of completion is unknown"





my eye itches. another person just told me i look like ****.

Hey I resemble that remark!

- J.

IT Deparments = Information Technology

It are the heart of any business. Without them, businesses would choke and die as people have forgotten how to live without email and an Internet connection and how they conducted business without it. Even before that, they were running the servers that companies hold their databases in.

If it is technological, it can be branded as IT. Phones, security systems, alarms, network connections, Internet, computers, PDAs, typewriters, etc. etc. Depends on company's definition of IT.

They're the people that read your email and office gossip, know what you are browsing at work and know what you are messaging to your colleagues and co-workers about your boss. They can even listen in on your telephone calls.

Do not **** with them.

- J.

Originally posted by Bella
Sounds horrible.

Actually it's great, I was just inexperienced. You shouldn't really have more than 3 glasses of it anyway because than the alcohol over rides what is known as "the absinthe effect". Lots of poets and artists including Van Gogh used it for inspiration. It gives you a wierd psychedelic clarity with enhanced colors, sounds and perceptions, along with a heightened state of stimulation/arousal which is why it's tempting to have too much and end up staring at your electric green puke. It just became legal in Europe again, but you can order it online and have it shipped too your home. Get the french Perrnod brand, it kicks ass but is about $60 for a bottle including S&H and takes a long time to arrive..

Originally posted by Blue Dawg
Actually it's great, I was just inexperienced. You shouldn't really have more than 3 glasses of it anyway because than the alcohol over rides what is known as "the absinthe effect". Lots of poets and artists including Van Gogh used it for inspiration. It gives you a wierd psychedelic clarity with enhanced colors, sounds and perceptions, along with a heightened state of stimulation/arousal which is why it's tempting to have too much and end up staring at your electric green puke. It just became legal in Europe again, but you can order it online and have it shipped too your home. Get the french Perrnod brand, it kicks ass but is about $60 for a bottle including S&H and takes a long time to arrive..

This explains a few things........

Originally posted by The Jake

They're the people that read your email and office gossip, know what you are browsing at work and know what you are messaging to your colleagues and co-workers about your boss.

Do not **** with them.

- J.

Then they know that I was just beating off too the Paris Hilton sex video and am logged on to Global all day. No wonder she looks at me like I've sprouted horns. I wonder how much of my administrative support knows and if the office manager knows why my door is always closed.....

Originally posted by Nuno
This explains a few things........

Back then the Absinthe was MUCH stronger because it had a higher concentration of the psychoactive agent known as thujole oil which comes from wormwood and was known for sometimes causing blindness and or Insanity, reputedly Van Gogh had a few too many glasses before he chopped off his ear and gave it to his favorite prostitute. However, they made it legal again because of advanced distilling techniques and using less thujole and making it safe enough.

Ooooohhh..........

welp i took the greasy cheeseburger advice. i'm not really feeling any better....

i need to yell at someone. gotta go find me an underwriter!

Originally posted by The Jake
IT Deparments = Information Technology



They're the people that read your email and office gossip, know what you are browsing at work and know what you are messaging to your colleagues and co-workers about your boss. They can even listen in on your telephone calls.

Do not **** with them.

- J.

HEY!! Sounds like my job!! Only I don't get paid at all, much less $80K/yr.

Originally posted by The Jake
IT Deparments = Information Technology

It are the heart of any business. Without them, businesses would choke and die as people have forgotten how to live without email and an Internet connection and how they conducted business without it. Even before that, they were running the servers that companies hold their databases in.

If it is technological, it can be branded as IT. Phones, security systems, alarms, network connections, Internet, computers, PDAs, typewriters, etc. etc. Depends on company's definition of IT.

They're the people that read your email and office gossip, know what you are browsing at work and know what you are messaging to your colleagues and co-workers about your boss. They can even listen in on your telephone calls.

Do not **** with them.

- J.

no. sales is the heart of every business and has been since commerce became a part of the world. those 2 statements are facts, plain and simple.
technology may be very well intertwined into the business world nowadays, but i believe most of these IT ****tubes are simply exploiting the fact nobody really knows what the hell goes on in techworld so they can appear useful and mandatory when, in reality, they are useless ****ing overpaid middlemen.

Purity is correct. Without the sales force, there would be no need for the IT department. IT the HEART of business? VERY WRONG. BTW, my minor in college was in MIS so I have no bias against IT, except for that our IT dept. knows what a perv I am that enjoys violent combat sports, but IT is only a useful tool employed by those that make the commerce happen.

I would think that the product or service, thus the customers, is the heart of every business......because without the product/service or customers you have nothing.

Originally posted by madcrewmom
I would think that the product or service, thus the customers, is the heart of every business......because without the product/service or customers you have nothing.

exactly. and sales is what brings the 2 together.

Originally posted by Purity
exactly. and sales is what brings the 2 together.

Exactly.

Originally posted by Blue Dawg
The first time I drank Absinthe I puked flourescent green.

I want to drink Absinthe! I read about it in Maxim a few months ago and have wanted to try it ever since. You gotta order that **** from Czech or Russia or some ****......

Get the **** from France, it's da bomb! Pernod makes it.

Originally posted by Purity
no. sales is the heart of every business and has been since commerce became a part of the world. those 2 statements are facts, plain and simple.
technology may be very well intertwined into the business world nowadays, but i believe most of these IT ****tubes are simply exploiting the fact nobody really knows what the hell goes on in techworld so they can appear useful and mandatory when, in reality, they are useless ****ing overpaid middlemen.

True dat. A lot of people do abuse their positions. Most of them get discovered for being frauds for doing that and get sacked and/or sued (my dad just replaced one of them). Although some of them maintain such absolute control over a company management will not take a piss without their approval. I saw it at the last place I was at, and Astro can attest to this (how Systems ran the show).

Sales drives commerce but that's true but the point I am making is technology is now HOW we do business. It's not a case of setting up a stall and pitching direct to the public like we did a hundred years ago. I've spoken to managers crying when they can't send email because they've forgotten how they got by without it. This is the problem and this is the age we live in.

We live in a society so DEPENDENT on technology that they cannot CONCEIVE of a live without it.

So what's your sales rep going to do when he needs to get out a proposal by 5pm (and it's 4pm already) but can't because the network is dead, or the power is out, or the phones are out. Is he going to powercycle the router, check the firewalls, run tests and make the call to the ISP or start troubleshooting the network? Does he know how to check a PABX? Does he know anything about bottlenecks and how they can impact on a network?

Hell no. He will run screaming and crying to the sysadmins. Whose job you think will be on the line if the dude doesn't get the proposal out? Certainly not the sysadmins. This guy left his proposal to the last minute. Why? Because we rely on the EXPEDIENCY of that technology. We rely on it being there 24/7, often to a fault. We expect technology to make up for our own shortcomings and it doesn't work that way.

- J.

PS: Absinthe is available now because within the past two years they were able to extract the toxic compound of the wormwood that drove people insane. Tastes exactly the same apparently, just without the nasty side effects. Some places like in France you might be able to buy the real deal, but I dunno how many people want to go insane :)

PPS: Purity - I understand what you mean. I think what you're driving at is that technology is just meant to help companies do business. That's the way it's meant to be, I'm trying to point out in practicality it doesn't always work that way.

People often can't understand the role technology plays in the perpetuation of the business model so they are often largely unsung. This is the case with my department. Our classification isn't Operations like most tech roles. It falls under Disaster Recovery and Business Perpetuation (something like that). Basically, we help keep the ship afloat.

Just to paint a picture of what I do, the ISP I work for would probably be out of business within 2 - 4 weeks if our department is gone.

Abuse deals with dealing with abuse within our network. If it not resolved swiftly, the company gets a bad rep and several independent groups start a process called "blacklisting" where your IP addresses go into a pool. Anything in this pool or "blacklist" are summarily disregarded. This means if you send an email and the address you are sending from or via. is in the black list, it gets dropped. Imagine running a business off only to find that your ISPs mailserver can't send email because they've been blacklisted. What would your reaction be?

Criminal and civil charges could also be brought to bear if we're being negligent or seen as complicit to network abuse, depending on the severity and type of abuse.

Email is the number one resource people rely on the Internet for despite the fact that 3/4 of it are spam.

If you're with an ISP and whole address ranges are added to a blacklist, then you can't get email out. Spammers and network abusers hammer the network until all our public address blocks are black listed. The ISP would be hammered with complaints from customers and people outside the network. The ISP would be severely crippled. People would leave because their Internet account would be effectively useless to them.

Throw criminal and civil charges in the mix with customers leaving a business like a rats leaving a sinking ship, and you're talking about a business going down quicker than a $2 hooker.

This is an addition to the other tasks we peform that try to save money for the company (which has a direct numerical value to upper management because they like numbers).

- J.

Originally posted by Blue Dawg
Get the **** from France, it's da bomb! Pernod makes it.

Except Pernod is not true absinthe, because it does not have the traditional wormwood..

Originally posted by The Jake
True dat. A lot of people do abuse their positions. Most of them get discovered for being frauds for doing that and get sacked and/or sued (my dad just replaced one of them). Although some of them maintain such absolute control over a company management will not take a piss without their approval. I saw it at the last place I was at, and Astro can attest to this (how Systems ran the show).

Sales drives commerce but that's true but the point I am making is technology is now HOW we do business. It's not a case of setting up a stall and pitching direct to the public like we did a hundred years ago. I've spoken to managers crying when they can't send email because they've forgotten how they got by without it. This is the problem and this is the age we live in.

We live in a society so DEPENDENT on technology that they cannot CONCEIVE of a live without it.

So what's your sales rep going to do when he needs to get out a proposal by 5pm (and it's 4pm already) but can't because the network is dead, or the power is out, or the phones are out. Is he going to powercycle the router, check the firewalls, run tests and make the call to the ISP or start troubleshooting the network? Does he know how to check a PABX? Does he know anything about bottlenecks and how they can impact on a network?

Hell no. He will run screaming and crying to the sysadmins. Whose job you think will be on the line if the dude doesn't get the proposal out? Certainly not the sysadmins. This guy left his proposal to the last minute. Why? Because we rely on the EXPEDIENCY of that technology. We rely on it being there 24/7, often to a fault. We expect technology to make up for our own shortcomings and it doesn't work that way.

- J.

PS: Absinthe is available now because within the past two years they were able to extract the toxic compound of the wormwood that drove people insane. Tastes exactly the same apparently, just without the nasty side effects. Some places like in France you might be able to buy the real deal, but I dunno how many people want to go insane :)

PPS: Purity - I understand what you mean. I think what you're driving at is that technology is just meant to help companies do business. That's the way it's meant to be, I'm trying to point out in practicality it doesn't always work that way.

i just walked into the IT department. 80% of the cubes are empty. 2 people are sitting on their desks bull****ing w/ eachother and one dude is in his own world, spacing out with the headphones on. here's the first email that i got this morning:
The UniForm application is experiencing performance issues. Technicians are working to resolve this issue. Updates will follow

**** IT

Originally posted by Green Iguana Queen
Except Pernod is not true absinthe, because it does not have the traditional wormwood..

No the company Pernod now makes and distributes TRUE absinthe with thujole oil from wormwood, you can only get it online, I'm not talking about the Pernod you can buy here in the states, that **** is weak.

Originally posted by Purity
i just walked into the IT department. 80% of the cubes are empty. 2 people are sitting on their desks bull****ing w/ eachother and one dude is in his own world, spacing out with the headphones on. here's the first email that i got this morning:
The UniForm application is experiencing performance issues. Technicians are working to resolve this issue. Updates will follow

**** IT

Hahahaha... yeah its a great line of work.

- J.