2 condoms are walking down the street, bored and wondering what they fancied doing this evening.

They walk past a number of bars but can't decide on which one to enter. Finally they reach a gay bar. One jonny says to the other "what about this one eh?"

"nah pal, i really don't feel like getting **** faced tonight."

Ba-boom.

Whats the mating call of the black bird?

"Stick it in me Leroy!!!"

Why did more black soldiers die in Vietnam than white ones?

Because everytime the commander shouted "get down!!" all the blacks started break dancing.

A duck walks into a shop.

"got any matches" asks the duck

"no sorry, we don't sell matches here" the shopkeep replies.

Next day the duck waddles back in.

"got any matches guv?"

"I told you yesterday we don't sell matches here"

The next day the the duck walks back into the grocers.

"got any matches"

To which the grocer angrily replies. " I told you the last two ****ting days we don't sell matches, and if you ask again I'm gonna nail your twatting beak to the counter!"

"Have you got any nails" responds the duck

"No we ****ing don't sell any cunting nails"

"Pack of matches then please"

" I told you the last two ****ting days we don't sell matches, and if you ask again I'm gonna nail your twatting beak to the counter!"



Truth be told, I lmao.

Those black jokes were weak son.

anyway.

What's the worst thing you can find at the bottom of your daughters bed?
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Gary Glitter's silver boots.

Those black jokes were weak son.

anyway.

What's the worst thing you can find at the bottom of your daughters bed?
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
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Gary Glitter's silver boots.



Those jokes were good, and you know it.

Whats the difference between Jam and Custard?

You cant Custard your **** into an old man's mouth.

:?!:

What's pink and crawls up women's legs?









homesick abortions