View Full Version : A heavyweight story.


made in bed
08-28-2008, 04:44 PM
Most of you probably already know me because of my great contribution to this forum but I'll introduce myself to the newcomers.

As a young white boy I grew up in the suburbs. I now go boxing in the hood, so obviously I got it alot harder than all those black kids who are too poor to buy decent equipment or healthy food.
I'm now a grown man of 25 years old and I'm still certain I'll be heavyweight champion of the world. Why you ask? because I spend most of the time on my couch watching cartoons out of which I build up my life philosophy, that's why! Boxing requires a lot of determination ladies!

When you watch into the mirror you have to ask yourself if you are really built for it, for waking up 1 hour after you just went to bed and sprint 40 miles.
I currently weigh about 5k lbs (needless I need to you that when I look in the mirror I see future champion) but I'm on this awesome diet where I only eat a grain of rice a month. I'm losing about 200 lbs a day now so soon I'll be below 0. When I feel really hungry I just sniff some oranges through a straw to get my blood pumpin', that **** is heavier than xanax and all the other drugs I've stuffed my body with during my rebelious years 2 days ago.

You gotta work hard, and I mean GOTTA! Because boxing is not a game *****, no sir! You gotta work hard to minimalize your brain damage! That's why I try to copy a 70's George Foreman, that guy's defence was incredible and his style fits perfect for amateur. I have a PHD in being a dirty bastard in the ring and clinching, because that's how they roll in the AMs!

So as you should know by now, becoming a heavyweight champion is a ***** because it requires alot of sacrifice. I had to sacrifice food, cigarettes, and a boner, because the lack of tabaco gives me a limp dick. But hey, when you are as delusional as me, you KNOW sacrificing all this will lead to great glory, even though the only thing I've ever done is going all out in sparring while my opponent (tiger the ****ing survivor! OMG!!) probably just wanted a learnful session.

Boxing is not only physical, hell no! There's alot of rocketscience involved that I obviously master, like newtons second law mass + acceleration = force. The mass obviously means your fist alone, that's why I throw armpunches and still manage to leave my entire body completely exposed. (because thats how my hero george foreman does it right?)
And the acceleration part makes total sense too, because we all know acceleration = immediate speed, right? right??

Well, that's me in a nutshell, a very big nutshell obiously because my extremely fat ass has to fit in it.

TheBlackSwifty
08-28-2008, 06:33 PM
lol geeze how do you reply to that, ya cant flog a dead cat. You really have said alot without really saying anything. You talk too much, go to the gym, search/phone around for a decent sparring partner/s close to your weight as possible and get that first fight on ya scorecard.
:boxing:

JoHnNyBoXeR
08-28-2008, 06:42 PM
Most of you probably already know me because of my great contribution to this forum but I'll introduce myself to the newcomers.

As a young white boy I grew up in the suburbs. I now go boxing in the hood, so obviously I got it alot harder than all those black kids who are too poor to buy decent equipment or healthy food.
I'm now a grown man of 25 years old and I'm still certain I'll be heavyweight champion of the world. Why you ask? because I spend most of the time on my couch watching cartoons out of which I build up my life philosophy, that's why! Boxing requires a lot of determination ladies!

When you watch into the mirror you have to ask yourself if you are really built for it, for waking up 1 hour after you just went to bed and sprint 40 miles.
I currently weigh about 5k lbs (needless I need to you that when I look in the mirror I see future champion) but I'm on this awesome diet where I only eat a grain of rice a month. I'm losing about 200 lbs a day now so soon I'll be below 0. When I feel really hungry I just sniff some oranges through a straw to get my blood pumpin', that **** is heavier than xanax and all the other drugs I've stuffed my body with during my rebelious years 2 days ago.

You gotta work hard, and I mean GOTTA! Because boxing is not a game *****, no sir! You gotta work hard to minimalize your brain damage! That's why I try to copy a 70's George Foreman, that guy's defence was incredible and his style fits perfect for amateur. I have a PHD in being a dirty bastard in the ring and clinching, because that's how they roll in the AMs!

So as you should know by now, becoming a heavyweight champion is a ***** because it requires alot of sacrifice. I had to sacrifice food, cigarettes, and a boner, because the lack of tabaco gives me a limp dick. But hey, when you are as delusional as me, you KNOW sacrificing all this will lead to great glory, even though the only thing I've ever done is going all out in sparring while my opponent (tiger the ****ing survivor! OMG!!) probably just wanted a learnful session.

Boxing is not only physical, hell no! There's alot of rocketscience involved that I obviously master, like newtons second law mass + acceleration = force. The mass obviously means your fist alone, that's why I throw armpunches and still manage to leave my entire body completely exposed. (because thats how my hero george foreman does it right?)
And the acceleration part makes total sense too, because we all know acceleration = immediate speed, right? right??

Well, that's me in a nutshell, a very big nutshell obiously because my extremely fat ass has to fit in it.

LMAO !!:rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl:

smash ko
08-28-2008, 06:54 PM
dude ur a **** tip sum1 ban him ull never go pro! or semi n u dnt no **** n u luk like a twat in ur pic im 13 and i actually box my coach is pro and i only go on here to tlk bout modern boxing so jus fuk of

sugarshanenas
08-28-2008, 07:08 PM
Most of you probably already know me because of my great contribution to this forum but I'll introduce myself to the newcomers.

As a young white boy I grew up in the suburbs. I now go boxing in the hood, so obviously I got it alot harder than all those black kids who are too poor to buy decent equipment or healthy food.
I'm now a grown man of 25 years old and I'm still certain I'll be heavyweight champion of the world. Why you ask? because I spend most of the time on my couch watching cartoons out of which I build up my life philosophy, that's why! Boxing requires a lot of determination ladies!

When you watch into the mirror you have to ask yourself if you are really built for it, for waking up 1 hour after you just went to bed and sprint 40 miles.
I currently weigh about 5k lbs (needless I need to you that when I look in the mirror I see future champion) but I'm on this awesome diet where I only eat a grain of rice a month. I'm losing about 200 lbs a day now so soon I'll be below 0. When I feel really hungry I just sniff some oranges through a straw to get my blood pumpin', that **** is heavier than xanax and all the other drugs I've stuffed my body with during my rebelious years 2 days ago.

You gotta work hard, and I mean GOTTA! Because boxing is not a game *****, no sir! You gotta work hard to minimalize your brain damage! That's why I try to copy a 70's George Foreman, that guy's defence was incredible and his style fits perfect for amateur. I have a PHD in being a dirty bastard in the ring and clinching, because that's how they roll in the AMs!

So as you should know by now, becoming a heavyweight champion is a ***** because it requires alot of sacrifice. I had to sacrifice food, cigarettes, and a boner, because the lack of tabaco gives me a limp dick. But hey, when you are as delusional as me, you KNOW sacrificing all this will lead to great glory, even though the only thing I've ever done is going all out in sparring while my opponent (tiger the ****ing survivor! OMG!!) probably just wanted a learnful session.

Boxing is not only physical, hell no! There's alot of rocketscience involved that I obviously master, like newtons second law mass + acceleration = force. The mass obviously means your fist alone, that's why I throw armpunches and still manage to leave my entire body completely exposed. (because thats how my hero george foreman does it right?)
And the acceleration part makes total sense too, because we all know acceleration = immediate speed, right? right??

Well, that's me in a nutshell, a very big nutshell obiously because my extremely fat ass has to fit in it.

what kind of boxer goes to sleep at 3:30 and sprints 40 miles

lol

peewee1460
08-28-2008, 07:20 PM
he's just ****in with us, he knows he aint ****.

d_lyrik803
08-28-2008, 08:37 PM
i like this guy, hes a comedian.:rofl:

cosmichorn
08-28-2008, 09:11 PM
Lots of sarcasm i detect, especially stuff about foreman :lol1:

dfwtx
08-28-2008, 09:31 PM
that was ****ing hilarious especially with the oranges, nicely done. is that shawn?

floydfan
08-28-2008, 10:40 PM
LOL someone finally made an alt of this guy and made fun of him. Check the name theres no space.

sugarshanenas
08-28-2008, 11:54 PM
o **** i just realized it was an alt lol

KostyaTszyu44
08-29-2008, 02:28 AM
Most of you probably already know me because of my great contribution to this forum but I'll introduce myself to the newcomers.

As a young white boy I grew up in the suburbs. I now go boxing in the hood, so obviously I got it alot harder than all those black kids who are too poor to buy decent equipment or healthy food.
I'm now a grown man of 25 years old and I'm still certain I'll be heavyweight champion of the world. Why you ask? because I spend most of the time on my couch watching cartoons out of which I build up my life philosophy, that's why! Boxing requires a lot of determination ladies!

When you watch into the mirror you have to ask yourself if you are really built for it, for waking up 1 hour after you just went to bed and sprint 40 miles.
I currently weigh about 5k lbs (needless I need to you that when I look in the mirror I see future champion) but I'm on this awesome diet where I only eat a grain of rice a month. I'm losing about 200 lbs a day now so soon I'll be below 0. When I feel really hungry I just sniff some oranges through a straw to get my blood pumpin', that **** is heavier than xanax and all the other drugs I've stuffed my body with during my rebelious years 2 days ago.

You gotta work hard, and I mean GOTTA! Because boxing is not a game *****, no sir! You gotta work hard to minimalize your brain damage! That's why I try to copy a 70's George Foreman, that guy's defence was incredible and his style fits perfect for amateur. I have a PHD in being a dirty bastard in the ring and clinching, because that's how they roll in the AMs!

So as you should know by now, becoming a heavyweight champion is a ***** because it requires alot of sacrifice. I had to sacrifice food, cigarettes, and a boner, because the lack of tabaco gives me a limp dick. But hey, when you are as delusional as me, you KNOW sacrificing all this will lead to great glory, even though the only thing I've ever done is going all out in sparring while my opponent (tiger the ****ing survivor! OMG!!) probably just wanted a learnful session.

Boxing is not only physical, hell no! There's alot of rocketscience involved that I obviously master, like newtons second law mass + acceleration = force. The mass obviously means your fist alone, that's why I throw armpunches and still manage to leave my entire body completely exposed. (because thats how my hero george foreman does it right?)
And the acceleration part makes total sense too, because we all know acceleration = immediate speed, right? right??

Well, that's me in a nutshell, a very big nutshell obiously because my extremely fat ass has to fit in it.

brilliant, great alt :rofl:

TheBlackSwifty
08-29-2008, 04:01 AM
Oh yeah, stupid me its a ****en alt,
just like me

markeeta
08-29-2008, 04:48 AM
there are a lot of ****ing sad cunts around this place. am i the only one who doesn't have an alt?

KostyaTszyu44
08-29-2008, 04:53 AM
there are a lot of ****ing sad cunts around this place. am i the only one who doesn't have an alt?

yes probably

i was aussieboxer but i got banned

and i was also futurechampion

TheBlackSwifty
08-29-2008, 05:10 AM
there are a lot of ****ing sad cunts around this place. am i the only one who doesn't have an alt?

miss out of heaps of fun

markeeta
08-29-2008, 05:22 AM
kostya...I think you are in my part of the world... you prob go to my gym and everything he he.

what do i need to do to get banned around here cause it seems like everyone else has?... gotta keep up my street cred.

Swifty... can you please explain in numbered order the process of having fun with an alt. I just write what I want through my own account and everyone thinks it is an alt anyway.

Markeetah
08-29-2008, 09:46 AM
Yes, please do tell.

eman-resu
08-29-2008, 09:57 AM
nice legs!

hinduw
08-29-2008, 11:13 AM
Anyone know who ThaUltimate was? The way he got exposed was hilarious.

Dan...
08-29-2008, 11:19 AM
Anyone know who ThaUltimate was? The way he got exposed was hilarious.

Why did you start posting under this account again?

hinduw
08-29-2008, 11:54 AM
Why did you start posting under this account again?

real account got permanent ban

Stormin' Norman
08-29-2008, 02:26 PM
Looks like I have a fan.


;-)

2/10

Golden-Gloves
08-29-2008, 03:08 PM
I wish they had a forum for bull****, instead of taking space in
the TRAINING & NUTRITION forum, ****

Stormin' Norman
08-29-2008, 05:33 PM
Go get me a sandwich and sit down

eman-resu
08-29-2008, 05:50 PM
more like 10 sandwiches

peewee1460
08-29-2008, 06:22 PM
more like 10 sandwiches

lmao :rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl:

KostyaTszyu44
08-29-2008, 06:42 PM
more like 10 sandwiches

:lol1: :lol1:

this **** made me laugh pretty hard, the title "a heavyweight story" was pretty funny, and the **** about the big nutshell at the end :lol1:

hinduw
08-30-2008, 05:06 AM
Go get me a sandwich and sit down

last thing you need is a sandwich fatso