Today I was just ****ing around and I upset this woman I work with. It was just a joke like, granted, probably a bad one, but she took it all seriously and I had to apologise profusely and say I was only joking. She's a kind hearted woman so she is, and I thought, **** me I'm a cunt. So later on I was writing in the sickness book and i put in that this guy at work took a day off because of gonnorrhea, just for the crack, but then later I though, nah, what if the cunt gets offended, so I tippexed it out.

**** me, it's boring being serious aint it.

Cunts.

You should have kicked her in the cunt.

You can take some of my piss

You should have kicked her in the cunt.

I considered it laddie, but i feared that I may lose me foot in the endeavor, so I opted against booting her in the fanny.

I'll have a glass, Kaygay, if you please?

I'll have a glass, Kaygay, if you please?

My pleasure.

I know what you mean Hoff. I don't take things seriously at all... if you ever ask me a question... i will always reply instinctively with a stupid cunt answer.

Like my line superviser asked me what I'd do if I saw anyone smoking whilst on duty and I replied that "i reckon i'd run up and kick there head off" to which she was like "Michael... assaulting students is no way to remove the issue of illegal smoking on the site!"....then i was like "yeah... i know... sorry."

My mate then whispered "pwn".

True story.

You can take some of my piss

What for slag? It's useless. Your piss would never pass a drugs test. I want some quality piss that is gonna do me some good, not bleeding yours.

I know what you mean Hoff. I don't take things seriously at all... if you ever ask me a question... i will always reply instinctively with a stupid cunt answer.

Like my line superviser asked me what I'd do if I saw anyone smoking whilst on duty and I replied that "i reckon i'd run up and kick there head off" to which she was like "Michael... assaulting students is no way to remove the issue of illegal smoking on the site!"....then i was like "yeah... i know... sorry."

My mate then whispered "pwn".

True story.

In some ways i wish that other cunts would somehow acquire a sense of humour, and other times I just think, yeah I was a daft cunt for saying that, but in most cases I just feel like laughing and making a joke of things. Today this woman was quite upset and I really had to try hard to stop meself from laughing or at least smirking in a way that would have probably made her feel worse.

Fetid fanny farts the lot of em.

I feel i'm an idiot too at times.

Couple days ago, i went to visit my friend who works in a shop behind the counter. She is real sensitive when it comes to her weight. She isn't fat, curvy more so......with a huge set of tits.

Anyways, as we were talking a customer approached the till. She was one of the most vile, disgusting not to mention smelly fat person i have come across in some time. I had to take a few steps back to the other side of the shop.

As this beast stacked her products onto the counter.....i woefully sent my friend a text message. Message read 'Wow, it's like looking into a mirror'. As she read it, she gave me 'THE' look. If looks could kill, she'd be doing life right now.

She hasn't spoken or got in contact with me since. Stupid things like that get me into ****ty problems daily.

Today I was just ****ing around and I upset this woman I work with. It was just a joke like, granted, probably a bad one, but she took it all seriously and I had to apologise profusely and say I was only joking. She's a kind hearted woman so she is, and I thought, **** me I'm a cunt. So later on I was writing in the sickness book and i put in that this guy at work took a day off because of gonnorrhea, just for the crack, but then later I though, nah, what if the cunt gets offended, so I tippexed it out.

**** me, it's boring being serious aint it.

Cunts.

I must know what yer did to upset the slag. Did yer let yer trousersnake take over and she couldn't handle the serpents' bite?

My company has American offices and I go over three or four times a year.

While I was over there last year I found out that a girl who works for the company had gotten pregnant, now she wasn't ugly but she was certainly no oil painting either so when I commented in front of many of the other employees that I would hunt down her attacker for Child Support it went down like a lead balloon filled with concrete, she attempted to do me for sexual harassment and I felt like a right cunt.

A bouquet of flowers, apology and excuse about British humour and jet lag sorted it out but I too sometimes just say what I think! :rolleyes:

My company has American offices and I go over three or four times a year.

While I was over there last year I found out that a girl who works for the company had gotten pregnant, now she wasn't ugly but she was certainly no oil painting either so when I commented in front of many of the other employees that I would hunt down her attacker for Child Support it went down like a lead balloon filled with concrete, she attempted to do me for sexual harassment and I felt like a right cunt.

A bouquet of flowers, apology and excuse about British humour and jet lag sorted it out but I too sometimes just say what I think! :rolleyes:

:kiss:

I love yer micky. I've used that child support at least three times. Once against me own cousin so yer can see I am a man with very little morals.

:kiss:

I love yer micky. I've used that child support at least three times. Once against me own cousin so yer can see I am a man with very little morals.

I think we understand each other me lover :flirt:

British humour best in the world.