i'm out here on the open road..or something.

first things first..why do people back their cars in parking spaces? i need an explanation for this, like now. it is harder to back your car in than it is to back out. i want to know why this is so commonly done, what does it help?

the same people who back their **** in are usually the same who have V-TEK stickers, modified mufflers, flames or other stupid decals on their cars. all of this is done after being inspired to do so after watching that piece of **** movie "fast and the furious"..that movie corrupted a lot of minds between the ages of 12-54. your muffler sucks, *****.

if you want a car that goes fast why not just buy one that is meant to go fast..when you buy a car that gets 64 miles per gallon, obviously it isn't meant to exceed speeds of 80 miles per hour. i predict in 10 years these burger flipping ******s will have .5 liter engines in their car the size of a computer monitor with a 900lb super charge turbo. the car will have some cool futuristic space age look with unoriginal decals all over it.

there's also a difference between a mustang and a mustant that goes fast..just because it says mustang doesn't mean it travels at the speed of light. (credit goes to allison for this rant).

do you think the execs at mr. pibb hate the execs over at dr. pepper? their product is just a regular citizen living on main street driving a ford taurus meanwhile dr. pepper has a PhD framed above his desk at the hospital and parks a mercedes in 1 of 4 bays of the garage attached to his 5500 sq. ft country club home.

i wonder if dr. pepper is called like, husamma pepper in afghanistan?

last night i went to a strip club with two friends..yeah that's right, strip club, titty bar, strip joint, place where chicks get naked, whatever you want to call it. it was my first and last time..that place ****ing sucked. i refused to spend one single penny. it sucked..the strippers were dumb skanks.

last month i stole a shasta cola off of a delivery tray at the hospital...i liked it. does anyone else remember when shasta was a tv show? like shasta mcnasty or something...i don't think it even made it past 1 episode..i'm pretty sure it got pulled in the middle of its debut on UPN and after coming back from its second commercial break they were showing hank hill reruns.

a few weeks ago i was at a friend's house standing outside while he was washing his car. this old guy with a white beard in a 1980s dodge suv drives by staring at us, he turned his ****box around and drove by staring yet again.

i don't wanna lose you baby, and i don't wanna be alone
don't wanna live my days without you, but for now i've got to be without you...lenny kravitz rules from what i understand.

like, last week i was at my friends house about to starve to death and he tries to get me to eat a tv dinner. **** no, **** you. you have to like a food really good to eat the tv dinner form of it...those things are ****ing awful. they also had popcorn in the freezer, explanation please.

my friend has become obsessed with strip clubs, i thought he was going back tonight but he's not. we might go up to durham tonight, its near raleigh..about 2.5-3 hours away. there's nothing else to do. i don't really want to go, infact..i don't want to go at all.

there has been a smell in my room for the longest time, i always thought it was old food. i'm pretty sure it was me though..i came back from florida and it was pretty much gone but now its starting to return.

did anyone else think joe ****er was black, or was i the only one? he's the voice from the "love lift us up where we belong" song..i think its on the soundtrack of officer and a gentleman.

are there any doubts that ZZ Top and huey lewis and the news are the worst bands to ever exist? zz top just sucks, who the **** makes a song called "i'm bad, nationwide"..and who puts "the news" in the name of their band?

i talked to leftbench on the phone and my voice kept cracking, he probably thinks i'm going through puberty. i might be, i don't know.

actually i think my voice cracked all weekend long..**** you voice.

sometimes my mom doesn't want to bring me food back, so she pretends like she thought i wasn't going to be here(yeah right). i have to eat cereal for dinner..it sucks.

i'll just go ahead and throw this out there...prowrestling sucks. yeah, it sucks.

hamanaka is no sakuraba and i was very disappointed at the last pride. pride gp is going to be won by sakuraba or yoshida, wait and see. i'll be right.

i think i might post more later but my carpal tunnel is starting to flame so i'm stopping for now.

oh yea, i got a speeding ticket. i'm pretty sure he didn't need to do that. he asked me where i was going..where the **** else would i be going heading north on I-95 with north carolina license plates..**** you old man. **** you st. george, sc. **** you $150 that i won't have in a few weeks. **** you insurance payments that will probably be increasing due to me breaking the law and getting punished for it. sdfsdfsdfsdfsdffd

i've got a pocket full of money oh yes i do
and a pocket full of keys that have no bounds
but when it comes to lovin
i just cant get you off of my mind, yeaaah

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
Had I been the one to take you to the tittybars you would have had a great time, sorry it sucked for you bud! Maybe putting a dollar by the cooter might have helped?

If you're going to buy a mustang, dont get the V-6 and try to act like its a Saleen. Worse than that, there's a guy in my complex with a V-6 who actually put Cobra emblems on it and peels out every day. It was a good day the time I busted him. ***. The *** I work with bought the GT and tried to tell me it it was a 410. I laughed and walked away. ***.

i hate that allison knows more about cars than i do and she's a woman and its not supposed to be like that.

WTF? Allison are you some kind of grease monkey or something?

Originally posted by Green Iguana Queen
If you're going to buy a mustang, dont get the V-6 and try to act like its a Saleen. Worse than that, there's a guy in my complex with a V-6 who actually put Cobra emblems on it and peels out every day. It was a good day the time I busted him. ***. The *** I work with bought the GT and tried to tell me it it was a 410. I laughed and walked away. ***.

I think I just fell in love with you

Originally posted by Cesaro
i hate that allison knows more about cars than i do and she's a woman and its not supposed to be like that.

but you could help her decorate

NO!

I do change my own oil, though.

she's better at that than me too

I go to jiffy lube, even though my dad was a mechanic for a while, I don't know **** about cars. I'm not real mechanically inclined.

i know how to pump gas but i don't like to do it.

I can tear down and rebuild a 350ci chevy engine in about 4 hours

i can dismantle a bed while standing on my head

is a 350ci a computer or a car

yeah

LOL!!!!!

I can masturbate while driving.

i want to masturbate while driving

You have to watch out for semi's or real tall vehicles.