The Jake
05-22-2003, 11:21 PM
Here I am - in LA, besides the woman I love.
Today I went for a walk in the sun, over a 100 degrees F. The air was thin from the heat, making running in impossible. Looking up into the mountains I could barely see the sky, it was so hot and the light so blinding. It was beautiful.
One of my deepest regrets over my life, particularly the past four years, is that ever since I started tech support, I rarely ever saw the sun. It rarely shines as brightly, with the heat of intensity of LA. We also see about as much rain as Seattle. I was cooped up in an office, and if I wasn't in an office, I was cooped up in a university hall or at my desk doing homework. I never got to truly bask in the sun. So finally being able to, is, fantastic. I never felt more truly alive.
Can it get any better than this?
I just finished reading this book by David Gemmell called 'Druss the Legend' and before that, 'Legend'. It's a story about a man, a woodcutter called Druss who married at the age of 15 and not long after, his wife is kidnapped by slavers. Druss spends the next seven years of his life trying to find her and bring her back. Seven years! Can you imagine that? Kinda puts my three month absence into perspective, eh? Not as bad as Odysseus waiting 20 years to see his wife again, but still, pretty ****ty.
Anyway, in his quest to find her, becomes a soldier of epic proportions and the stuff of legends. It's like a Conan novel with a little bit more humanity. The book's theme is about struggling against the odds, no matter the cost, if for no other reason than you believe it's the right thing to do. Another is to make the most of everyday we have on this earth, and to try to make every action we make, every word we make count for something - and to savor it all. One day we will not be here and it will be by our own actions that we leave any legacy behind and will define how we are remembered.
These books have made me really think a lot about life in a very different perspective.
They have made me think of how I want to be remembered when I leave this world, what sort of difference I'd like to make,
They have made me think of how the mistakes of yesterday should be a heavy burden on us every day for the rest of our lives. That the lessons learned should be remembered, but the guilt must be left behind as it serves no function.
They have made me think about what it is to appreciate life.
Good friends, family, sharing moments in time, toasting them with a drink, helping them in their times of need, them helping you in your times of need, helping others - strangers even, because you know it should be done. Savoring the heat of the day, the bright sun, a good book, a nice beer. The little pleasantries and sensations of life we often trivialise and ignore. Sometimes it's nice to take a moment in time and just freeze it and dwell on it - if only for a moment.
I've been doing this a lot lately.
Looking at Arju, drinking a nice beer with friends, helping people move, so forth. Little pockets of time frozen in my mind for all eternity. And just by paying a little attention to that one moment, I am so much richer for it.
Ferris Bueller said "Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in awhile, you could miss it."
I heard that line many years ago when I first saw the movie. I tried to live it, every day, but only now, being a little bit older and a little bit wiser do I think I begin to appreciate the depth of that statement. And I think the older we become, the more value it takes.
Life does move fast. Take me a year ago, I would never have believe I'd be where I am now. I was not doing what I wanted to do, being where I wanted to be, or being the person I wanted to be. I thought I was, but I don't think I knew I was. But every day since then, I feel as though I've taken one step further down the road fate has set for me, and becoming one step closer to being the man I want to be. I also try to look around me with each subsequent step and not just focus on the road ahead. Which is what I believe I was doing for a long long time. I don't think I can ever adequately convey how meeting Arju has done this for me, but fact is she did, and through her I've learned more about myself than I ever thought possible. In loving her, I appreciate her and how she enriches my life in every way and I try to savor that moment every day of our lives together.
I just wanted to pass this onto you all because I feel there is a lesson to be gained in this. I don't know if I've been able to adequately convey the sentiment, but I hope you understand at least, what it means to savor the moment and live your life to the fullest and what it means to chase your dreams and follow your heart. Trust your instincts, even if it is at the expense of reason, take chances and whatever happens, do what you feel is right. Make sure so that when you reflect on your life in 10 years time, you do not regret the actions and choices you made today.
Take the plunge and enjoy the ride - life is an adventure so for gods sake enjoy it. Make sure it is one worth remembering and furthermore, one that you are proud to have lived.
- J.
Today I went for a walk in the sun, over a 100 degrees F. The air was thin from the heat, making running in impossible. Looking up into the mountains I could barely see the sky, it was so hot and the light so blinding. It was beautiful.
One of my deepest regrets over my life, particularly the past four years, is that ever since I started tech support, I rarely ever saw the sun. It rarely shines as brightly, with the heat of intensity of LA. We also see about as much rain as Seattle. I was cooped up in an office, and if I wasn't in an office, I was cooped up in a university hall or at my desk doing homework. I never got to truly bask in the sun. So finally being able to, is, fantastic. I never felt more truly alive.
Can it get any better than this?
I just finished reading this book by David Gemmell called 'Druss the Legend' and before that, 'Legend'. It's a story about a man, a woodcutter called Druss who married at the age of 15 and not long after, his wife is kidnapped by slavers. Druss spends the next seven years of his life trying to find her and bring her back. Seven years! Can you imagine that? Kinda puts my three month absence into perspective, eh? Not as bad as Odysseus waiting 20 years to see his wife again, but still, pretty ****ty.
Anyway, in his quest to find her, becomes a soldier of epic proportions and the stuff of legends. It's like a Conan novel with a little bit more humanity. The book's theme is about struggling against the odds, no matter the cost, if for no other reason than you believe it's the right thing to do. Another is to make the most of everyday we have on this earth, and to try to make every action we make, every word we make count for something - and to savor it all. One day we will not be here and it will be by our own actions that we leave any legacy behind and will define how we are remembered.
These books have made me really think a lot about life in a very different perspective.
They have made me think of how I want to be remembered when I leave this world, what sort of difference I'd like to make,
They have made me think of how the mistakes of yesterday should be a heavy burden on us every day for the rest of our lives. That the lessons learned should be remembered, but the guilt must be left behind as it serves no function.
They have made me think about what it is to appreciate life.
Good friends, family, sharing moments in time, toasting them with a drink, helping them in their times of need, them helping you in your times of need, helping others - strangers even, because you know it should be done. Savoring the heat of the day, the bright sun, a good book, a nice beer. The little pleasantries and sensations of life we often trivialise and ignore. Sometimes it's nice to take a moment in time and just freeze it and dwell on it - if only for a moment.
I've been doing this a lot lately.
Looking at Arju, drinking a nice beer with friends, helping people move, so forth. Little pockets of time frozen in my mind for all eternity. And just by paying a little attention to that one moment, I am so much richer for it.
Ferris Bueller said "Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in awhile, you could miss it."
I heard that line many years ago when I first saw the movie. I tried to live it, every day, but only now, being a little bit older and a little bit wiser do I think I begin to appreciate the depth of that statement. And I think the older we become, the more value it takes.
Life does move fast. Take me a year ago, I would never have believe I'd be where I am now. I was not doing what I wanted to do, being where I wanted to be, or being the person I wanted to be. I thought I was, but I don't think I knew I was. But every day since then, I feel as though I've taken one step further down the road fate has set for me, and becoming one step closer to being the man I want to be. I also try to look around me with each subsequent step and not just focus on the road ahead. Which is what I believe I was doing for a long long time. I don't think I can ever adequately convey how meeting Arju has done this for me, but fact is she did, and through her I've learned more about myself than I ever thought possible. In loving her, I appreciate her and how she enriches my life in every way and I try to savor that moment every day of our lives together.
I just wanted to pass this onto you all because I feel there is a lesson to be gained in this. I don't know if I've been able to adequately convey the sentiment, but I hope you understand at least, what it means to savor the moment and live your life to the fullest and what it means to chase your dreams and follow your heart. Trust your instincts, even if it is at the expense of reason, take chances and whatever happens, do what you feel is right. Make sure so that when you reflect on your life in 10 years time, you do not regret the actions and choices you made today.
Take the plunge and enjoy the ride - life is an adventure so for gods sake enjoy it. Make sure it is one worth remembering and furthermore, one that you are proud to have lived.
- J.